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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

2nd hand car seats

32 replies

TheRebel · 12/01/2018 08:46

I wonder if I’m being precious so hopefully Mumsnet can set me straight.

I was chatting to some other new mums I met through a baby group and they all mentioned that they bought their baby’s car seats and cots second hand online. I always thought that you weren’t supposed to use 2nd hand car seats unless they were from someone you know and you’re certain they’ve not been in an accident but I don’t see how you could know that if you get them off some random on Facebook.

For background I’m sure none of these women are particularly hard up, they all got enhanced maternity pay, drive newish cars and own their own homes. If I thought that 2nd hand was their only option I wouldn’t be judging but I just can’t get my head around being so cheap!

OP posts:
SleepingInYourFlowerbed · 12/01/2018 08:54

I was told that about car seats too. You're meant to replace it after an accident so I don't think I would personally trust someone I don't know selling one.

upshltcreek · 12/01/2018 08:54

I would be a bit wary of second hand car seats but second hand cots are absolutely fine provided that you buy a new mattress. You sound a bit judgy to be honest.

TrinitySquirrel · 12/01/2018 08:55

Yabu. None of your business. The risk of buying 2nd hand is no greater than the risk of buying one from halfords and hoping the staff haven't dropped the box in transit or storage (they are not generally packaged in anything other than their cardboard box).

If the seat was involved in side impact collision where it would be dangerous to use 2nd hand, chances are the kid was so badly hurt the parents wouldnt give a toss about selling the seat.

WhyamIBoredathome · 12/01/2018 08:57

It's a huge risk. I bought one second hand extended rear facing seat from someone I know, so I know it hasn't been mistreated etc. I wouldn't buy from a random on fb.
I did sell our infant seat on fb though. I felt fine doing it as I know it had been looked after but obviously the person buying was just trusting me.

RatRolyPoly · 12/01/2018 08:59

I got my infant carrier seat new but my extended rear facing seats, those were second hand, and I definitely sound like the same demographic as the mums you're talking about.

For me I felt that the seat I could buy brand new for the same money would not be as safe, as the only ones that fitted my car were forward facing. I know you can't ever be sure a second hand seat hadn't been in an accident, but you can be reasonably sure, primarily by picking up the seats in person and chatting to the sellers.

The seats I bought are very expensive new, and anyone who bought one really doesn't need the money from reselling a damaged seat. Secondly these people have children which can easily be checked when you go to pick up, not only meaning you can confirm their reason for selling is valid but also that they're unlikely to want to endanger someone else's child.

Not saying it's for everyone, but personally I'm comfortable and think the insistence to buy new is a bit of a rip. I'd rather have high quality second hand than middle of the road brand new, but it's up to the individual.

WhyamIBoredathome · 12/01/2018 09:00

trinity advice from car seat manufacturers is usually to replace seat after any crash above parking speed.
My car was hit from behind and quite badly damaged, two (empty) child seats in car. Car seats showed no sign of damage but they were replaced by the insurance company. We had to cut straps and remove covers before taking to tip so that no one else would try to use them.

WhyamIBoredathome · 12/01/2018 09:02

I also suspect that someone who sells an erf seat second hand is unlikely to sell on a potentially unsafe one, if they cared enough about child safety to have researched and bought erf in the first place.

user1493413286 · 12/01/2018 09:04

I wouldn’t buy second hand seats; we were offered one by a friend but it was 5 years old and I was concerned about any improvements in safety that this car seat wouldn’t have, that might be a bit precious but when it’s about safety it’s important.
As long as they’re replacing the mattress I dont see an issue with second hand cots; I buy quite a bit second hand as babies often use things for so little time it feels a waste to constantly buy new.

Zampa · 12/01/2018 09:07

I've been wondering about the morality of selling/donating a (safe) car seat. As you're not supposed to buy them second hand, should you sell one on?

It seems an awful waste to bin mine when it could easily be used again.

RatRolyPoly · 12/01/2018 09:12

If you're honest about the good condition then sell it on! God, we're grown ups, people should be allowed to make their own choices. Anyway, the seat you're selling second hand may be significantly "better" (potentially safer) than the one someone could afford brand new, so isn't that a good thing to do?

weepingangel12 · 12/01/2018 09:15

It's really easy to see if a car seat is cracked or warped or damaged.
It's the manufacturers that advise us to keep buying new ones....funny that.

GinIsIn · 12/01/2018 09:17

I would give mine to a close friend or family member who would know I was being truthful in saying it hadn’t been involved in an accident, but I would never sell it as it’s encouraging a market for 2nd hand seats and they aren’t all going to be safe.

Barbie222 · 12/01/2018 09:21

I got new for the baby cradle thing and the next size up. After that got second hand as we were on those little boosters then. Not sure how much difference an impact would make with small boosters if you can’t see any damage. Now we all have to get high back anyway. People do get puritanical about this though and the very expensive rear facing seats for older kids.

thethoughtfox · 12/01/2018 09:36

It's very often wealthy / mc women who are relaxed about 'things' and clothes because they have nothing to prove whereas families who don't have a lot of money want to make sure their child isn't disadvantaged and want they to have the best of everything. The only people I know who buy designer clothes for their babies and children are less well off.

Original poster
TheRebel · 12/01/2018 09:37

I know I can be a bit judgy so I just kept my mouth shut when they were talking but they didn’t buy new mattresses, they just used the 2nd hand ones and one of the car seats looks ancient, probably about 10 years old! I know you’d like to think people wouldn’t sell a damaged car seat but I wouldn’t trust a stranger, everyone’s idea of what is reasonable is different.

All 3 have had a foreign holiday while they’ve been on maternity leave, personally I’d rather spend my money on a new car seat or mattress than a holiday but each to their own!

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 12/01/2018 09:38

A cot is basically just a wooden box. As long as you change the mattress, why would you need a new one. Are you planning to buy a new cot for each child?

BarbarianMum · 12/01/2018 09:42

As for car seats, I really doubt many people drag themselves and their children out of the wreckage and think "oh better flog off these car seats now". The odds of a seat having a) been in a serious accident and b) show no signs if damage are phenomenally low - a lot of the shock absorbtion comes from polystyrene ffs. That stuff bother dents and brakes.

GeorgieBoy95 · 12/01/2018 09:43

I've used second hand seats - they're fine. Of course the manufacturers would recommend them being replaced - they want to make as much money as possible.

weepingangel12 · 12/01/2018 09:45

All 3 have had a foreign holiday while they’ve been on maternity leave, personally I’d rather spend my money on a new car seat or mattress than a holiday but each to their own!

Oh yeah, you're not judging. Hmm

BarbarianMum · 12/01/2018 09:49

brakes? breaks

Original poster
TheRebel · 12/01/2018 09:51

Weepingangel12 I absolutely am judging, That’s what I said I was doing!

Like I said in my first post, if I thought they couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t judge, but these women are absolutely not short of cash.£400 for a car seat would be a drop in the ocean for them so I am a bit shocked that they’d be so cheap!

However I will keep my judging thoughts to myself and smile and nod next time it comes up Grin

OP posts:
weepingangel12 · 12/01/2018 10:06

You wouldn't judge if they were poor? So its ok to have an old car seat if you are poor, but not ok if you are not?
That makes no sense at all. Either its ok or it isn't, your income level does not change whether you think it safe or not.

Original poster
TheRebel · 12/01/2018 10:13

WeepingAngel12 because I’m judging the choice that they’ve made, if you can’t afford anything but a 2nd hand car seat then you don’t have the choice to buy new, but if you had the choice why wouldn’t you buy the best you can afford for your baby’s safety?

OP posts:
SheepyFun · 12/01/2018 10:42

Some of our car seats have been second hand. They look OK, and I'm with BarbarianMum, I really don't think many people are flogging damaged car seats. Also, the chances of being involved in an accident where having the newest carseat over an older one would make a difference are vanishingly small.

KenForPM · 12/01/2018 10:48

I volunteer in a charity shop and yesterday someone wanted to donate a car seat; we had to reject it for safety reasons. That was only my shop, though, I’m not sure about others.