To not want to travel to see this friend

[user1498912461]

So I had a message recently from an old uni friend. I haven't seen her for many years, we occasionally comment on each other's FB statuses but that's about it. She lives 7 hours away and recently messaged saying that she's on holiday soon and would I like to catch up? It's a 4 hour train journey to where she is staying so I told her that unfortunately it's too far for me. I offered to meet her if she came my home town. She replied saying that as she is traveling 3 hours to "get close to me" I could at least meet her halfway! The whole thing is just weird after all these years. AIBU to think her behaviour is odd?

Yanbu. That’s quite strange. I’d just reiterate that you aren’t able to meet her and ignore from now on.

Mmmm - l do this with an old college friend, we live at opposite ends of the country but meet for a couple of days in the town where we studied, which is about a hour from me and about 3 hours from her. I really like catching up and mooching round the galleries but if you haven't been in touch much and don't particularly want to see her then don't bother ... lt's too far and you're busy!

She isn't coming 3 hours to get close to you is she? She is having a holiday slightly closer than she usually is.

She's not travelling to meet you and even if she wanted to do that, she would need to talk to you first?! YANBU at all.

That argument would only work if you had made an agreement before she booked her holiday that you would meet halfway. YANBU.

Thanks all. Her message was completely out of the blue. She had booked her holiday already and told me the dates. I work and have small children and wouldn't be able to just take off on my own for a day or two. She's bonkers!

in that case I'd reply saying "you have booked a holiday, I hope you enjoy it but I can't come and meet you" and then ignore. Sounds bonkers!!

It sounds very odd. Who thinks that people can take a 8 hour round trip to meet up with them just like that?? I think it might be better off just keeping her as a fb friend.

Does she realize it is 4 hours away for you? If she thought it was 1-2 hours, that might explain why she thinks you could make more of a effort?

Could you meet her half way between her holiday destination and your home? That sounds fair to me. If not, why be in touch at all?

An old uni friend of mine suggested something similar last autumn. She'd moved slightly closer to where I live, however way out in the sticks so still requiring an inconvenient 4 hour journey to get there.

By then we hadn't met in person in more than 3 years and only communicated via the odd facebook message once or twice a year at most.

We didn't have a lot in common even when we were at uni. Cannot for the life of me phatom what possessed her to try to rekindle a relationship which was never really there in the first place.

I pleaded work commitments and pray to God she doesn't ask again!