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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this customer in Marks &Spencer was incredibly rude

48 replies

user1485342611 · 10/01/2018 11:12

I visited a Marks & Spencer cafe with my elderly aunt at the weekend. The place was packed and one member of staff was going around with a trolley clearing tables.

One customer (I'm not sure if she was a friend of the staff member) decided to engage her in conversation for about ten minutes (no exaggeration), while customers waited and waited at dirty tables an eventually began to clear the tables themselves.

Myself and my aunt were sitting at a table with a huge amount of dirty crockery, because it was the only table available. After waiting ages, and because there was too much to clear away ourselves, I eventually went up to the staff member and, after saying 'excuse me' three times, she eventually turned around.

I said that there was a lot of dirty dishes on our table that needed clearing. She just replied 'okay I'll be there in a minute' and I said 'thanks' and began to walk away. Whereupon the customer who had been holding her up shouted indignantly 'excuse me, excuse me, we're talking' and seemed outraged that I had interrupted them.

I just said 'yes, and I'm just asking for our table to be cleared' and walked away.

WIBU to have interrupted them? I don't think so as we, along with loads of other people, had been waiting for ages while they chatted away.

OP posts:
eastwest1234 · 10/01/2018 11:13

YANBU

M&s aren't paying their employee to talk to her pal

Original poster
user1485342611 · 10/01/2018 11:21

Thanks. I was really taken aback to be honest, but the staff member didn't seem the least bit phased or embarrassed. I'm all for a bit of friendly chit chat between staff and customers, but this was going on and on.

OP posts:
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 10/01/2018 11:41

"Excuse me we're talking" Cheeky patronising twunt" I'd have said "Excuse me I'm a paying customer. However the working is also as much if not more to blame.
Only that I'm not a cunt and wouldn't want the women to get into trouble. I'd advocate putting in a complaint. However at the same time in wouldn't blAme you if you did.
Perhaps she needs pulling up on her woeful customer service. "I'll be there in a minute". No love you'll be there now.
It is after all what you're paid for is it not.
I mean if she'd rather stand chatting shit with her obnoxious rude mate all day that's fine. I'm sure there are plenty of poor souls on the dole who would willing and properly do the job. No one is forcing her to stay there.
If environmental health walked in on the dirty plates ect ect. They'd have laid a egg.

DuchessofLondon · 10/01/2018 11:47

YNBU. You said excuse me first politely before asking staff member to clear your table. You didn't just barge in there with an order.

Llangollen · 10/01/2018 11:56

without knowing what they were talking about, it's difficult to judge. You were not wrong in any case, but could the other customer be complaining about something?

if they were just having a chit chat, it's not acceptable.

Original poster
user1485342611 · 10/01/2018 12:03

No, she definitely wasn't complaining. It was a relaxed and friendly looking chat. If there was a manager around I probably would have said something as I was not only annoyed, but embarrassed at being shouted at like that in front of other customers.

OP posts:
GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/01/2018 12:07

It wouldn't matter what this woman was discussing with the employee. Tables needed clearing! Cheeky cow. I think you were very restrained OP in your response to her.

londonrach · 10/01/2018 12:07

Yabu. Very rude but you dealt with it perfectly

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/01/2018 12:09

You what LondonRach? How on earth was the OP rude. The staff are there to work not to spend time idly chit chatting to their mates!

CheapSausagesAndSpam · 10/01/2018 12:09

The staff member's friend was annoyed you pulled her friend up...but where was the manager!?? I hate things like this. I was trying to pay for something at a till and another staff member began asking questions of the woman serving me...and LOADS of them so the woman couldn't concentrate on putting my stuff through...it was fabric and haberdashery so she needed to ask me measurements etc.

In the end I said "Shall we stick to this sale and then you can ask your questions later?"

The questioning woman was Shock

But really! Basic manners people.

CheapSausagesAndSpam · 10/01/2018 12:10

Duck LondonRach OBVIOUSLY meant YANBU but missed off the n.

Did you read her comment?

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/01/2018 12:12

Ah yes you're most likely right.
Sorry London.

RavingRoo · 10/01/2018 12:13

M&S encourage staff to build relationships with customers, especially regular customers. You didn’t do anything wrong from a customer point of you, but from a social / manners point of view you do need to wait until a conversation is finished before you interrupt & that is what the other customer was pointing out.

Mummyoflittledragon · 10/01/2018 12:13

The staff member and other person were very rude.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/01/2018 12:19

Ravingroo I disagree. The OP could have been waiting another 10 mins or more! She didn't just barge in but said excuse me. She wasn't wrong in any way. I'm sure if the employee had been seen by her manager they wouldn't have been happy.

Viviennemary · 10/01/2018 12:21

M&S cafes are horrible. Always full of uncleared tables and dirty crockery. And no-one around to ask where basic things are such as spoons if there are any clean ones. That other customer was extremely rude IMHO. And the staff member should have been doing her job and not chatting.

MrTrebus · 10/01/2018 12:25

YABU because m&s cafes are shit anyway full of miserable buggers and always dirty tables. And their coffee tastes like dirty nappies Grin

f83mx · 10/01/2018 12:26

@ravingroo - i can't imagine that m&s encourage staff to talk to customers over and beyond doing the basics of their job though surely - i.e. making sure a table is clean so someone can actually sit there and use it?

starray · 10/01/2018 12:28

No, the staff member and the other customer were 100% rude and inconsiderate. One of my pet hates is when there is a long queue at the till and the person in front of me decides to have a long, long, long, slow, slow, slow leisurely chat with cashier, totally oblivious to the fact that there are loads of people behind them...(this is even more annoying when you are reaching the time limit on your parking and risk getting fined!)

paxillin · 10/01/2018 12:28

As you say, you don't know if this was a friend of the member of staff, could have been a customer with a question or a complaint.

Some people are able to make their enquiries and even their complaints look like a a relaxed and friendly looking chat. I do.

There was a queue on that staff member's attention and you jumped it.

Shineystrawberrylover · 10/01/2018 12:30

My nearest m&s cafe is great (except at weekends). I have been going there reasonably regularly for more than 10 years. A few members of staff know me. They are always friendly, but they are working and whilst I might ask how they at a quiet time are I'd never dream of saying anything other than hi when someone clearly has a massive task/ is very busy. Rude chatty woman appears to be somewhat lacking in that level of social awareness. Hell even if it was her long lost sister some sort of "you're busy can i get your number" would be the way to go. YWNBU.

gillybeanz · 10/01/2018 12:30

Tbh, I'd have got up, walked out and spoken to the duty manager on the way out.
I know it might have been difficult with an ageing aunt, but people need to take action and not put up with this type of service.

AntoniaCaenis · 10/01/2018 12:33

I find that the staff in my local M&S are generally very rude and unhelpful, especially when actually asked to do their jobs... (such as being asked for a different size, or placing an order for an unavailable item) until I get to the till to pay and get a scripted interrogation about my kids.

It's the least helpful and pleasant customer experience in my (small) town. but they do the best knickers

Hillingdon · 10/01/2018 12:36

Its a real shame that M&S have got into the mess they have. I am a Premium Club member and get some coffee vouchers every month. The cafe's need a jolly good shake up. Massive queues, often young inexperienced staff or oldies who aren't quite as quick as they were.

Tables piled up with dirty plates. I believe they are one of the better paid retail jobs yet the quality of staff isn't good.

leccybill · 10/01/2018 12:38

I'd have probably got up and dumped the dirty crockery on her trolley in a slightly slammy way, because I'm a passive aggressive coward like that.