Cousins and competition

[corkgal]

Before I even start, I know I Abu but I just want to vent. We live close to
Husbands dn who is the same age as ds2.
Dn parents are very financial comfortable - more than us but we are doing ok too ( not sure if this is relevant)

Over the last year I've noticed that when ever ds2 has a new interest ( these are frequent and tend to be a little eccentric to be honest) dn claims the same interest too, he asks his parents for the relevant toy/book etc and they give it to him. On Halloween after they wore their costumes to school a few days before the trick or treating he demanded and got the same slightly odd costume that ds2 wore. All ds2 presents for Xmas were the rolls Royce slightly better version of what my son has asked for. Today they popped over and dn was wearing an expensive obscure rugby shirt that my ds has gotten from his godmother for Xmas. He doesn't play or follow rugby. His mom who I am close to just shrugged and said he wanted it.
This has started to send me over the edge, I know it's a compliment etc etc but I think I'd feel better if dn didn't have the slightly better version of everything ds2 has.
Ds2 (if I'm honest is a bit of a nerd), very bright but definitely some odd interests and while wouldn't be as athletic as his brother is definitely average at sport, dsil has said that she feels dn will be very sporty as is his dad (even though I don't see any evidence of that yet) and can in a joking way slag ds2 about sports etc when even I can see they are both fairly equal is not being great to be out honest.
This has started to eat away at me, dn tends to be a bit whiny which is a trait that grates on a little. You can break every thing in my house but don't whine at me, I find myself avoiding them which I hate about myself.
My question is really how can I stop this bothering me. I really really want it not to bother me.
Sorry for the length and typos, am on my very old dodgy phone!

I totally understand why this is annoying but I'm not sure there is much you can do. I think it would be very hard to push back against it without looking a bit unreasonable.

Does it bother your son that his cousin copies him? If he doesn't mind I would be tempted to just acknowledge the fact that the situation is annoying and then just let it go. It's likely that your nephew will grow out of it as he grows up and develops More interests of his own.

I had a friend like this... it started with the odd toddler toy... then clothes and then gym classes and dance lessons... The thing is, it still gets to me and I hardly ever see her now! I also had a colleague who did the same but nicked my ideas and sucked up to the boss... she moved on but I found out years later that she named her daughter the same name as mine (quite an unusual name).

Sorry for waffle and it still bothers me so I don't think I've helped at all!!!
I keep telling myself that copying is a form of flattery etc...

This would annoy me too!

I'm not sure of the solution to be honest ☹️

I would try and source things from very difficult to find suppliers, and refuse to disclose where I had got them.

Thanks ladies
I know it's a form of flattery and I also know In the scheme of things it's completely unimportant but it irritates me to an irrational level.
It has started to bother ds2 a little since he started to notice but I'm definitely more bothered than he is.
If I hear the phrase "what shop Is that from" again in the next few days I think I'll scream.

Could you get DS2 to take up the trombone? Or violin? And say he was getting to quite a competitive standard and you’ll definitely be inviting them to shows much later in the year! But no they can’t hear him now as it would ruin the surprise about how talented he is!
Or just get him to wear the same hoodie every time they see him. Over some even more obscure football team from another country.
Maybe place some bets on how soon they will copy him to keep you sane

Altiara

I know it's wrong but I'm considering things like that....
Telling them that ds2 is taking up ballet( wonder if that will fly) and see what happens.
Honestly I'd be shocked at this stage if he wasn't in the class before him..

I'm actually more annoyed with his mom who never ever says no to him.