To worry about to him staying at her house?

[thestarryeyedsurprise]

I don't want to drip feed so apologise in advance I'm looking for some clarity and good advice.

Back story. I was in an EA relationship for 3 years. My sister passed away too and was a very horrific time for me. After spliting with EA partner I met with a friend I hadn't seen for over 10 years, we started a relationship etc. He has 2 children, 2 mother's. 1 DS and 1 DD. After split DD mum text DP and said she couldn't stop thinking about them having sex etc. Since it's made it difficult for me to be okay with them texting all the time. DD lives 300 miles away and DP drives every month to see her. He has stayed at ex's house whilst visiting Dd. I said I didn't think this was okay considering she still wanted a relationship with him, he agreed and said he would stay elsewhere in future which he has DoNE

This Christmas. Due to a few reasons, death of my sister, parents separation and impeding custody case. I stupidly overdosed. My son was with my mother and I hit rock bottom. My DP made sure I was okay but left next day to visit DD. This was fine. He ignored me the time he was away but upon return admitted to staying at ex's house and said she was away at the time.

AIBU to feel betrayed he stayed at her house and worrying now every time he stays away?

If she wasn't there what exactly is your problem? I think that perhaps your grief/depression is clouding your thinking. Sorry about your sister, her loss must be terribly painful.

Sorry to read you are having such a terrible time.
If she really wasn't there then there's nothing to worry about.
I hope things improve soon

Sorry to hear about your bereavements and problems and I hope you are feeling a lot better now.

Regarding your Partner, I think you are going to have to trust them. Maybe have a conversation that you feel she texts too much.

You don't say how long you have been together. If not long, then it's a bit unreasonable to dictate how he sees his daughter.

So sorry about your sister

Did he visit his DD the after you overdosed?

It was shitty of him not to at least text you now and again while he was away.with his dd being so far away, it sounds like he's going to be (rightly) making these trips for many years to come. Can you cope with that? I wouldn't be happy with him staying at ex's either. How did you find out about her feelings for him?

*the day after

Sorry Petal have been together around 7 months, I think it's massively important he has a relationship with his DD as I personally grew up without my biological DF, I just feel his timing was bad and now it has triggered trust issues.

Cherry It was very next day. I have always said amicable relationship doesn't bother me but it's when she is OTT and texts him for no reason to do with DD that it bothers me.

Cherry He admitted what she had text him about him wanting sex and his response was that she didn't want it whilst they were together.

Sorry to say but I feel you should forget about your relationship and focus on yourself, your health and your child.
I think being in this kind of relationship, with your current state, is not good for you. You are likely to become more and more paranoid and insecure when your DP goes away, which will be detrimental to your health and relationship.
I suggest you take a step back and heal yourself first. Then develop the relationship.

If the text are OTT, then maybe you should discuss this. Are you allowed to see the texts? Are they on the level, or is there an element of an EA going on? Why don't you travel up and see DD as well? It's good you support the visits.

Sorry but him staying at her house seems the least of your worries.

Maybe try and step back from the relationship and focus on yourself and your son.

I wouldn't trust him or her. Sorry.

Seconding what the previous poster said. It doesn't sound as if you should be in a relationship at all at the moment, with him or anyone else you have been through a horrific time and your state of mind is understandably not very strong. Focus on getting your mental health and strength back before you get into a relationship.

I've no idea if this man is sleeping with his ex or not. Unfortunately you're not really in a position to dictate under what circumstances he visits his DD yet as your relationship is in fairly early stages. If you generally trust him and the relationship is strong then I would say you might want to give him the benefit of the doubt but based on what you've said here I would question that. It sounds as if he is playing games with his ex and is generally quite emotionally immature.

Look after yourself and your child first, get some help if you're not already getting some, take some time out. Tell this guy you want some alone time. If he's still there after that he might be the guy.