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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask someone’s child to shush in the cinema?

51 replies

mrskevinclifton · 07/01/2018 19:01

If the parent is not even attempting to shush their child in the cinema am I okay to turn around and ask them to? Just sat through Jumanji with incessant child (5 ish y/o) yabbering all the way through. I appreciate it’s a kids film but I’m not a fan of paying £10 a ticket to listen to someone else’s child process the plot out loud.

OP posts:

genever · 07/01/2018 19:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

specialsubject · 07/01/2018 19:30

Good for you. You paid to see the movie, not to listen to jabbering.

I was worried about my recent cinema trip, still school holidays. Have to say that parenting was excellent, all peaceful even in the quiet bits. Faith restored!

CarolineForbes · 07/01/2018 19:32

I was wondering this on Friday evening. The kids looked to be about 8 and it was Pitch Perfect 3 which is a PG 13. The mum obviously didn't care though as she was talking back to them at normal volume

ilovemydd · 07/01/2018 19:33

If they do it again (excuse my language) but tell them to shut the f**k up!

If they still do it ask the staff for a refund and walk out.
You bought the ticket and payed for it so you are entitled to watch the film.

Anditstartsagain · 07/01/2018 19:36

I took ds1 to Jumanji Friday evening he's 5 but very capible of sitting and watchiny he's quiet and likes to follow the rules, my dn didn't see a 'grown up' film as in not a disney during the day until she was 10 as she can't sit still or keep quiet she seems noisy by nature it's a battle to keep her quiet at the best of times.

I always remind them both before we go to ANY movie even the kidsAM showing they need to sit and watch not jump around. If other kids do I would shush them and death stare the parent.

LittleWitch · 07/01/2018 19:41

We went to see Dunkirk recently. Cinema practically empty, three young women came and sat right in front of us, feet up on the seats, phones tapping away and eating their cheesy nachos. At no point did they look up at the screen. They went in and out two or three times, individually and as a group. Is this a thing now - just hang out in the cinema as if you were at home? Chatting, eating, surfing?

SouthWestmom · 07/01/2018 19:41

My kids were outraged after sitting behind some wittering kid in the Pokemon movie who just kept dribbling on - naming the Pokemon, shouting out, etc etc.

As we all left the manager came over and gave this kid some promo posters, saying he'd never seen someone so excited about going to a film before - wish he'd come in and heard it all before giving him a reward!

BashStreetKid · 07/01/2018 19:43

YANBU. Did it work?

MadamPatti · 07/01/2018 19:50

Went as a large family group over the hols to see Star Wars. IMAX 3D. Thick end of £20 per ticket. Busy screening. Spent most of the time listening to infernal rustling of snacks from the row behind us. There seems to be a certain breed of sweet packet designed to generate maximum volume. Wasn’t any one specific person. Gives me the bloody rage.

Gatehouse77 · 07/01/2018 19:50

I've told other people to be quiet with talking in the cinema and to put their phones away. I've also told older kids to mind their language when mine were younger (not restricted to the cinema but queues, etc.) And at the theatre once told a child to stop making a racket with their sweets. I have no problem 'teaching' manners in the right context and, so far, have never been approached by an angry parent.

At home, mine were expected to be quiet during family films and even watching certain TV programmes (DH has only recently given in to watching Dr Who and the like with the kids because he gets wound up if they talk). I have also taught them that if it's absolutely necessary to talk wait for a loud part or, at the very least, not when the actors are talking.

I did go to the cinema with 2 friends once and one of them was on her phone - myself and the other were so embarrassed and did tell her to put it away.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 07/01/2018 20:19

I do remember one time at the cinema, someone had got so fed up of the teenage girls at the back giggling and shrieking at each other, they stood up and bellowed across at them: -
"Shut up or get the fuck out!"
There was silence from then on. Probably helped that he was built like a brick out house and had lungs like Brian Blessed. I don't think I'd have had the same effect.
Went to see Star Wars recently. The family next to us seemed to be of the somewhat squirmy variety, with much switching of seats and passing stuff about during the adverts. They settled as the film began, but about half way through the mum started talking to her daughter. I was about to shoot them a death look, but then the daughter said "Shhh mum, the film!" Good for the daughter!

And what is it with people nipping in and out the whole time? We paid over £10 a ticket, I'm not going to get up and miss part of the film! For goodness sake, go to the loo before you go in, turn your phone off and if you're hungry, tough!
(dons Kevlar helmet for people ready and waiting with their excuses as to why they need to be up and down so much)

Mumhomealone · 07/01/2018 20:28

DC and I were the only people in the whole cinema when two girls (probably 7 and 10) came in with their mother and grandmother. They sat right by us, despite having the whole, large cinema to choose from. The girls and the adults chatted constantly throughout the film. Shortly after the film started the girls left their seats and started wandering around and lying across various seats before eventually sitting on the stairs .

I was gobsmacked but the mother and grandmother didn't seem to think it was an issue (too busy chatting to each other to care).

alfagirl73 · 07/01/2018 20:59

The PP who mentioned Woman in Black... I was so annoyed when I went to see this film. I'm pretty liberal about certificates and I love horror films... but I personally thought that film should've been a 15. What occurred to me though was that, being one of Daniel Radcliffe's break-out roles from Harry Potter the film makers had obviously pushed for it to be a 12a so as to pull in all his Harry Potter fans. The problem was that most of them had spent years following him in Harry Potter and had never been to see a horror film before. So I had the pleasure of a large group of teenage girls screaming hysterically throughout the film and being overly dramatic about it. Very annoying! They ruined it for me - they were so noisy through the whole thing.

I can't stand when people go to the cinema and are incapable of just sitting and watching the film! What's with all the talking and texting etc... have we really got to a place where enjoying a bit of escapism at the cinema for a couple of hours is a challenge?!

crazycatgal · 07/01/2018 21:08

Totally agree with everyone talking about The Woman in Black and its 12a rating.

I went to see it in the cinema and ended up sat behind two boys who were between 10-12 (didn't really look old enough to be without an adult) who kept talking and shouting cockily at the start of the film. A teenaged girl told them to shut up and the boys tried mouthing off at her until several other people in the cinema also told them to shut up.

PrincessoftheSea · 07/01/2018 21:14

I hate it when you have paid a fortune and people have taken children far too young to sit through a film either because they are just too young or the film is not age appropriate and they get bored or don't understand and ask constant question. A lot of people seem to think this is ok.

I think its just a lot of people who don't know how to behave these days. A lot of anti social behaviour.

madeyemoodysmum · 07/01/2018 21:14

I don't think women in black should be a 15 as no blood or swearing. It's all the mind. But should have been a 12 not a 12a. In fact I hate the 12 a rating Attracts the wrong audience.

TheCrossKeys · 07/01/2018 21:15

My kids were outraged after sitting behind some wittering kid in the Pokemon movie who just kept dribbling on - naming the Pokemon, shouting out, etc etc.

My DS has ASD and knows everything there is to know about Pokémon. He did exactly as you described when we went to see it and I shushed him as best I could but he forgets, you see. I tell him and a minute later, poof, forgotten. I had emailed the cinema beforehand to check their policy on what would happen if we had to leave because of him making a noise and the manager responded to say that as the noise was outside of his control I shouldn't worry and that their accessibility policy encourages the idea that the cinema is for everyone. I don't know if anyone complained about his noise but I imagine they'd have been given replacement tickets if they did.

crazycatgal · 07/01/2018 21:20

@TheCrossKeys I'm not sure whether it's Odeon or Vue but I'm pretty sure that one of them does autism friendly screenings if you're worried about shushing him. I'm not saying that your DS has to go to these screenings but it's just a thought.

JessicaPeach · 07/01/2018 21:26

I shushed someone (a mum chatting on her phone in a normal voice) at a showing of the wizard of oz at the cinema before xmas. So rude.

My 3.5yr old is a dream at the cinema, I took him to see Jumanji last week (I was nervous it might be too scary at a 12a) but he loved it and was perfectly behaved, the lady next to me commented on how good he was at the end, I bet she was nervous when we sat down next to her!

juliesaway · 07/01/2018 21:29

People just care less and behave how they feel in public now, not caring about what anyone else thinks. Another 10 years it will be impossible to go to the cinema and enjoy it. We already go less than we used to because of all the talking, phone use, attitude, etc.

SylviaTietjens · 07/01/2018 21:30

As long as it’s not at an Autism Friendly screening or equivalent. I’ve had my ds shushed during that and I could’ve cried. We’d been twice and he absolutely loved it - not so much the film but the whole getting popcorn, sitting in a big comfy seat and not being frightened. Then a woman tells me to shut him up because he’s distracting for her kids. His little face just crumpled and he sat in silence for the rest of the film and now refuses to go back. He was only laughing and flapping because he found Moana funny.

TheCrossKeys · 07/01/2018 21:35

Sylvia

I expect a certain level of noise at kids films, especially cartoons, because you know there are going to be a lot of excited children there and excited children tend to make a noise.

crazycatgal · 07/01/2018 21:38

@SylviaTietjens You should have put in a complaint about her, nasty woman.

SylviaTietjens · 07/01/2018 21:38

It seems fairly common tbh crosskeys. A lot of people go along these (very clearly advertised) autism friendly sessions. Then complain that there are autistic people/ people with additional needs there.

manicinsomniac · 07/01/2018 21:53

YANBU

But I wouldn't have had the guts ... and I'm a teacher

Did it work?

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