So panicked I'm an impostor in new job - they're all so high flying

[KnifeEdgePrecision]

WTF. I feel they made a mistake or something, like maybe the company mixed my name up with someone else's cv?

I'm so drained tonight. I love the job itself and everyone is extremely nice, but I feel fake! I'm so worried everything I say is wrong! What the actual fuck am I doing there they are all extremely capable with prestigious backgrounds and then there's me sitting there like a lemon.

I have to pretend I'm confident, obviously, so that means I have to speak sometimes - honestly it's almost like I float out of my body and sit watching myself be a twat. I get so nervous I can hardly formulate sentences and my voice sounds weird and then I start worrying I sound like a complete weirdo, in addition to having nothing good to say.

Went over and over everything I said on my commute home, cringing so much at stuff I said.

Everyone is so nice and encouraging and scared that's all going to stop once they realise I'm not intelligent, talented or glittery like they are

I'm probably just tired, but I'm genuinely close to tears tonight. This job means everything to me and I'm so scared now I've got a dream opportunity, I have to confront the fact I'm not good enough

They wouldn't have given you the job if they didn't think you could do it. Too many of us fall prey to Imposter Syndrome. You are super!

Fake it til you make it.
Still doing that after 10 yrs in management. The secret is a lot of people are winging it!
They have given you the job for a reason. I interview people - I pick zest, enthusiasm & eager to learn over drab with qualifications every time x

I've had Imposter Syndrome several times over the years. (or maybe I've always had it but it doesn't surface if my job is shitty ) It's weird and very disconcerting, isn't it?

I'm sure they haven't mistaken you for someone else! And if everyone is so nice and encouraging them presumably they are aware the there is a settling in / learning period. Well done on the new job

I got this when I started my job. I have realised everyone is winging it!! You'll be fine, keep at it and enjoy!

Don't worry, half of them are probably faking it, they are just more experienced at pretending than you.

I’m ‘senior’ in my job... post grad... etc etc and feel like an imposter... head hunted for my last job... been there 2 years and had a bonus and a pay rise I didn’t ask for... I get good appraisals and feed back but like you OP I feel like a fraud... My mum tells me it’s a confidence thing... my mum is usually right :) stick with it! In my experience those who question themselves are far more likely to be decent than the arrogant types who are all self belief and charge ahead regardless! Give yourself time and be kind on yourself! You were picked for a reason!

Best thing you can do is tell someone in your new place about it, and they'll either say they had it too, or that you're not an imposter. Win win :)

Like others I have had this, and some of the most externally confident and awesome people I know have had it too. Don't compare how you feel on the inside to how everyone else appears to be on the outside.

They chose you for a reason, hang on to that.

Hugs xx

I have just started a new job and feel the same even though I have enough qualifications it seems that however many I do it is not enough to make me feel ok. I think experience in your job will increase your confidence.
It’s interesting that lots of women suffer from this. You are good enough and maybe you don’t need to know everything immediately.

I second ‘fake it til you make it’ this really has got me far many times. Aim high.

Another fan of "fake it until you make it" here too. I think most people have that feeling when they start a promotion but itll go in time. Well done and good luck!

I've always felt like a total fraud for the first month of a new job. It's a sign that it matters to you and that you care about getting it right. These people who know so much more than you are the same people who thought you were the best available candidate for your job. Guess what? They were right!

I remember talking to a really senior academic - a professor at Cambridge university - once, and he told me that he never walked across the lawns in his college without being scared someone would yell at him to get off, that he'd been found out, that he didn't deserve to be there and his decades long con was over.

A friend was promoted in a marketing company when another firm took over, and she'd got her own degree from an ex-poly. She was exactly as you describe in her first few weeks there, because all the very polished, shiny people at the new multinational went to Oxbridge, or UCL, or Bristol, or Durham etc. She said, after a month or two, that they weren't actually any better than she was, and she couldn't believe how intimidated she'd been. It ended up increasing her confidence in herself. But the bridge to that point was painful, to say the least.

I have come to the conclusion, from incidents such as that (too many to relate) that Imposter Syndrome is what separates normal, functional, conscientious people from the Donald Trumps of the world. What sort of a narcissist has no doubts, when in your situation? It's your dream job. You're in the deep end, you are working out how to perform, and you are aware of that. You're aware of the increased responsibilities, the really competent peers, and what sort of arse doesn't suffer moments of anxiety, in that scenario?

The reality is that they employ good, high-flying staff, as you can see from those around you. This means they are highly competent in recruitment and skilled at selecting an excellent workforce. This would, now, include you. Have some faith in them. They sound like they really know what they're doing.

I knew this feeling. 15 years in IT, then I got moved sideways, into the senior science tech role. I was going to quit altogether, got offered it.

"Science?! The only qualifications I have are my old GCSEs.".."you learn fast, you're smart, you're careful".

6 months mentoring from a lady who'd done it for 40 years, then solo. Biology/chemistry/physics, all the labs, staff, kids, equipment, chemicals, acids, poisons, ordering, audit, H&S etc etc.

Bit terrifying if I step back and look at it now. But 4 years on, we're holding fine. Few explosions, few "oh, shit" moments, few "duck and covers", lots of time reading and researching, testing and.. Ok, ok.. Playing.

I'm feeling pretty confident now, but like you by the sound of it, there was no learning curve.. More a vertical take off.

Keep going, don't ever be embarrassed to ask for help.

I have to pretend I'm confident, obviously and they are probably doing the same, good luck

I have this got 22 years experience in my industry. Feel i’m Going to get found out!!

I'm so glad I found this thread as I have just started a new job and I honestly dont think I should be there! My Manager is amazing and so encouraging , I just hope I can pick it up.

I exist in "fake it till you make it" mode.

I keep waiting to be found out. Instead, last year, I won seven scholarships, 2 major awards, and was awarded a prestigious internship for the summer (it's even paid!)

I still feel like a fraud.

Don’t compare you’re insides with other people’s outsides.

It’s early days OP. Brazen it out. You got the job, that means you were the best, and most defintely capable of doing the job. Trust to that and try to relax. You’ll feel more at home in no time

If you don't think you should be there, it means one thing, you care about what you are doing, simple as that. Give it time, it's all new.

I've done quite a lot of recruitment over the past couple of years for my team, I'd always pick enthusiasm, ability to learn and a good attitude over some one who is a high flyer and can "hit the ground running" (hate that phrase!), but is an arrogant sod.

Perfectstorm's post is excellent.

Put in one to one catch ups with people who can help you. Ask lots of questions outside of the big meetings. Take a complete time out lunch break each day and keep telling yourself you can do this. I have been there and it is scary but it feels amazing when you overcome the settling in period and people begin to see your value. Remember you have fresh eyes to offer. You can bring experience that they don’t have but use their experience as much as you can too.

How long have you been in post? I think it takes a good year to fully get to grips with a new role. Do you have a supportive manager or mentor you could confide in?
Also agree with everyone about this being completely normal. I work in academia and it’s very common - I’ve been on various leadership courses and everyone nods furiously whenever imposter syndrome is discussed!