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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend I have known since childhood

1 reply

FriedGreenTomatoesLady · 02/01/2018 11:33

I have a very good / very old friend.
We have known each other since school. We are both mothers of young children (She has one child I have more)

She works 2 days a week sometimes (self employed)... sometimes not at all. I work full time.

She is always saying how much she misses me and wanting to see me / catch up.

I often suggest get togethers and frequently she is either too busy or when we do meet it's always at some random time she deems acceptable to her "busy" life. I.e: I fit around her schedule - which as far as I can make out seems to involve going to the gym mostly.

Why can't she see the effort I make is out of proportion to the effort she makes?

I'm sure she doesn't secretly dislike me as a mutual friend has exactly the same issue with her - it's just how she operates.

Drives me insane. We are all busy. We are all tired. I get it. But I also make the effort to see people I want to see. I feel like not making the effort again right now. AIBU to find this behaviour a bit selfish or should I just get over it? I would hate to fall out with this person as she means a lot to me - I would just like to feel that it wasn't such an effort for her all the time.

OP posts:
Els1e · 02/01/2018 12:37

I have a friend like this. We (me and her) make a joke about it. I always meet as part of a group as she is so flaky on her own. I just text “A and I are meeting whenever. Great if you can make it too”. I don’t expect a reply. I have noticed she is now turning up more.

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