Going to be the best mother in law

[iheartcupcake]

Hi
Those of you who doesn't have a good relationship with your mother in law, do you sometimes think about what kind of mother in law you will be when your children get married? Like you know how it is and how it feels to be treated like that, so you just wanna be the best mother in law? Or is it just me lol.. I don't have a good relationship with my mother in law, how dare I marry her golden boy.

Posting here for traffic

*impossible

I have 2 daughter in laws and 2 step daughters, all have children under 7. I never give unasked for advice, treat all grandchildren the same, dont expect my adult sons to be at my beck and call, always babysit/collect from school when asked, help out as and when needed.
I have an excellent relationship with 3 out of the 4 girls, the other seems to dislike me and is not interested in a relationship of any kind.
So we can only do our best.

It is one of the daughter in laws that doesnt like me.

I have two DSs so hope to be a good MIL one day.

My MIL is a nice person but she's overly personal and after almost fifteen years she still hasn't realised that it makes me uncomfortable. She doesn't understand that I am a private person.

But she's a nice person and the kids love her. I think she would like us to be friends and talk daily / pop round several times a week but that's just not me. All the partners of her other children either live with them or very close and have been sucked up by the family, so I think she wishes that had happened with us too.

The single most important thing to me re my MIL is: treat me like my own separate person with a past and ambitions and my own desires rather than just an extension of your son.

Thats what Ill try to do if I'm ever a MIL.

Respect the person your son has chosen as being her own woman.

One of my ds has been in a number of long term relationships and with each his partners I hope I have been friendly and welcoming. I have not tried to be best friends with them as they have their own best friends already but I have been happy to know them.

My mil died before dh and I met so have not had any relationship with her. Dd - 25 - has just lost her mil (she was only 57 when she died) so I hope I am being a good mil to my sil and supporting him.

mumoftwo yes you’d think so wouldn’t you