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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I have broken my leg

116 replies

littlebird55 · 29/12/2017 19:02

I have two young dc. My dh is working non stop and my nearest family member is nearly 200 miles away. All my lovely friends are away or visiting other family or sick. Literally no one is around to help me even a little bit.

I was doing okay up until this afternoon, I have been stuck inside this house for a week now and feeling the cabin fever. I have used up every last craft idea, movie idea and now I am just crying. I am in pain, I am tired as I can't sleep. We are snowed in and I don't think I can take much more.

Do you have ideas at all how I can get through this?
I am too scared to go out in the ice and snow with my leg in full plaster and crutches. I am trying to be positive but I have hit such a low, I don't think I can carry on with getting through the day much less another five weeks of this.

OP posts:

crunchymint · 29/12/2017 19:58

Can you do a food online delivery? Tell kids they can order x number of things if they help you do it and put stuff away. And order microwave things.

I broke my leg when I was already ill. I did not go out the house for 6 weeks except to hospital. You will get through it.

I wouldnt worry about washing, let DP or DC do it.

BumWad · 29/12/2017 19:58

Sounds tough op.

Chocolatecake12 · 29/12/2017 20:00

Have your kids had playdates in the past? Surely not everyone of their friends are away. Could you call parents and ask them to have the kids for an afternoon maybe?
You can return the favour when you’re better.
Old photos are lovely to look through if you can dig them out. Your hair and clothes from the past would give the kids a right laugh!
Have they got sharpies? Have they decorated your cast?

guardianfree · 29/12/2017 20:01

Op, It's the first week or two that is the worst. Once the break 'settles' and starts to heal, I found that I was much more mobile and less stressed.
By the fourth week I was remarkably mobile - I did slip on an icy surface once but apart from that I was much more mobile and creative.
Maybe give yourself a break - you've been through a tough time. I made friend with my local cab firm who took me to the local supermarke (who took one look at me staggering about on my crutches and promptly allocated me a helper to get things off shelves for me) I think they thought I was a danger to others . The cab firm would come and rescue me when I had wandered too far on my crutches 'Oh, you're the lady with the broken leg, where are you?" I was normally about 400 meters from the house but too tired to get back there!

Sending you all good wishes.

NC4now · 29/12/2017 20:01

Haven’t RTFT so apologies if I’m repeating what others have said.
I had a back injury a few years ago when my boys were about the age of yours.
I tweaked our general menu to involve lots of sandwiches and crisps that they could just help themselves to. And bits the older one could cook, eg soup, burgers, pizzas etc.
Healthy eating goes out of the window for the sake of getting by. It’s fine.
Can you manage the cinema, just to get a break? Or trampoline park, and just have a coffee while they bounce off some energy?
It’s rubbish and lonely having an injury that floors you. Have some

Joinourclub · 29/12/2017 20:04

I'd be tempted to let the kids do something crazy and memorable, like design and paint a mural on the bedroom wall. Then that will become the thing they remember about this holiday rather than the broken leg.

Mummyoflittledragon · 29/12/2017 20:06

Thanks. . I have a pretty brilliant dh too. He also works long hours but he does take dd out a lot when he’s free. She does a lot of activities as I can’t play with her as much as I’d like. You’ll get through this. I hope homestart can help. They took ages to set anything up for me when dd was little but maybe your local one will be more reactive.

Can you face time/Skype family? Give you a bit of a break. Dd also used to like playing PE (and asked to play it again today). You get the kids to do a workout basically. Run round the room. Hop, crawl, tip toe, jump, big strides, sit ups etc. Get them to stick loads of pieces of paper together and draw round themselves and fill it in. Lifesize drawings of themselves. Do they like crafting? Could they make a musical instrument/junk model with all the crap lying around? Perhaps a little too old for your eldest but they would be there to help the youngest. Teach them to knit? Online coding? Sign them up to educational websites? Eg maths.

ny20005 · 29/12/2017 20:07

@littlebird55

Luckily my kids were in school but my poor dh was run ragged trying to sort them, me & work. My mil was fab & sent soup & a couple of dinners home with dh fur the first week or so.

We've now got into a wee routine & I can manage to cook.

I bought a chair online that has me at right height for cooker.

I can't shower or dress without dh so plenty of times, I've been up & dressed at 6am before he goes to work.

I got a travel mug so I can make coffee & bring it back to living room

Eldest is a great help, youngest not so much

I've got never damage so while I'll probably be out of boot in the new few weeks, I'll still be off work & having physio for some time

Parker231 · 29/12/2017 20:08

What about your DC’s school friends? I’m sure their parents would be pleased to help by collecting your DC’s for a day and sort out a meal for you.

NapQueen · 29/12/2017 20:12

Does your dh always work such long hours?

AJPTaylor · 29/12/2017 20:19

Have you tried sitters.com?

TheMadGardener · 29/12/2017 20:22

I broke my leg 8 years ago -on the knee so whole leg plaster. The first couple of weeks were the worst. DH rallied round with cooking, laundry, pet care etc. We hired a wheelchair with a leg rest from the Red Cross and that really helped. I wore a little bag round my neck so that I could carry things from room to room in it. I also needed a picnic mug with a lid so that I could carry drinks without spilling them. And DH got me a litter picker so I could reach out and grab things more easily. It was June and Wimbledon was on so I watched a lot of tennis...

GlitterGlue · 29/12/2017 20:30

You poor thing.

A perching stool may be helpful for the kitchen.

Children can load and unload washer/dryer. And make their own sandwiches, bung things in the microwave at the very least.

I suspect the children would also take great delight in pushing you in a wheelchair.

Can you hire a cleaner to come in for a couple of sessions? Just to keep on top of things?

Any possibility of children being booked into a holiday club for a couple of days? We have one that operates a sports camp - well exercised and worn out children - result!

buttfacedmiscreant · 29/12/2017 20:45

Seatoski... great list...

I'd add...

making forts out of sheets and sofa cushions

picnic for lunch on blanket in middle of living room

making a big loop of string around doorknobs or something similar with a piece of paper and send messages back and forth. When they get bored of doing that then suggest they make up a code and send secret messages between them.

who can build the tallest tower out of XYZ (we have plastic drinking cups that work well for this)

something from here.... www.telegraph.co.uk/comedy/what-to-see/family-party-games-christmas/

give them a ball of yarn and one of them make a "web" by wrapping it around furniture etc while the other goes out of the room. then the other one comes in and has to figure out how to unwind it. They can also do a mission impossible course where they have to climb over and under it. If they do it by you lying on the couch you can hold the end for them if you want to get (minorly) involved.

XYZ movie marathon.

that game where you put a potato in the toe of a pair of tights and then they take it in turns to put it on their head and try and knock over plastic cups

living room obstacle course

one hour (timed) quiet reading with cozy blankets, hot chocolate and a fire on (or picture of fire on TV) after lunch. Order everyone a new book on Amazon and pick fun ones if you can afford it.

House elf game... mum closes her eyes and pretends to be asleep. "House elves" clean, tidy or put away one thing and then mum wakes up and has to guess what was done. Children having seen the house elves have to give warm, hot and cold clues as mum guesses.

buttfacedmiscreant · 29/12/2017 20:47

sorry, didn't explain well... big loop of string is like a pulley. Paperclip/clothes peg a piece of paper on the loop then pull it over to the other person.

buttfacedmiscreant · 29/12/2017 20:49

oh and if you did say, two things a day and let them play and be bored the rest of the day you are doing your job. Kids need time off school to rest and be bored. They shouldn't be entertained all the time.

Plus you are teaching them empathy and caring skills having them help you and help look after you... so they will know how to care for a loved one as an adult.

yippyyappy · 29/12/2017 21:02

I second a knee walker/knee scooter. I got a terrible lisfranc injury and was non weight bearing for almost 3 months with a 3 year old ds and absolutely no help apart from dh a couple of hours.

I wouldn't have been able to cook for ds or look after the animals if I hadn't had the knee walker. It was AMAZING.

I got really down, it's amazing how people show their true colours when you need them.

yippyyappy · 29/12/2017 21:03

My knee walker had a basket on the front so I could even tidy the house/ do laundry etc.

yippyyappy · 29/12/2017 21:04

I also couldn't take painkillers because I'm in a state with a huge opioid problem and so they wouldn't prescribe me anything strong enough for more than a week.

NC4now · 29/12/2017 21:08

For mine it’s always been physical. I need to wear DS1 out. DS2 not so much.
I always need to think of ways to burn off energy. If we’re cooped up, we don’t cope.

hellofresh · 29/12/2017 21:11

Time to teach the dcs some independence. They are old enough to cook, clean and do laundry at that age. They shouldn't need to be bribed with cash. At 11 I reguarly did all those jobs, and happily too. I could see my DM was busy and it made everyone's life easy if we shared the domestic work. Plus you'll be doing them a favour. Everyone needs to learn life skills.

ny20005 · 29/12/2017 21:17

@yippyyappy

It's amazing how people show true colours ! I had loads of messages wishing me well. My best friend lives round the corner & ive seen her about 4 times in the 5 weeks I've been housebound

I've had flowers from work but only 2 friends visit

AuntLydia · 29/12/2017 21:44

I'm glad to see you've had some great practical suggestions here, I really hope they help a little

ZipItZebedee · 29/12/2017 21:48

Have your kids had playdates in the past? Surely not everyone of their friends are away. Could you call parents and ask them to have the kids for an afternoon maybe?

This is a good idea. I think people would respond well to this.

A text might be an idea. You could phrase it really politely

ZipItZebedee · 29/12/2017 21:53

Can you send your DCs to the shops together? Depends where you live and what your kids are like but maybe the 11 year old could at least get out the house a bit.

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