To feel aggrieved?

[KangarooCanCan]

I feel as though my DSis is getting preferential treatment over me from my DM.

Apols for the long post, but let's set the scene...

I have a DH and one DC. We own our own home and are entirely financially independent (as I would expect to be given our circumstances) We're both ft employed but have to watch the pennies. It's tight (mortgage, childcare etc) but we made our bed so are lying in it...

My DS is less than 2yrs younger than me, also ft employed but single and renting. She's told us how much disposable income she has each month and it far exceeds ours. She also has savings of at least £50k.

Here's the rub:

My DM still pays for my DSis to holiday with her and recently bought (on top of xmas and birthday gifts) a suitcase because my DSis "needed it for work".

While I appreciate It's for my DM to spend her money how she wants, I'm not afforded the same financial luxury, it seems.

When I was my DSis's age I had my ducks in a row and didn't think it appropriate or fair to still rely on my DM given I had moved out, bought a home, had a kid etc.

Am I the mug here for trying to be a separate entity to my DM or am I right to feel a bit put out?

I would ask dm where she is taking you and don't forget your suitcase also!!
Bloody hate this!!
I have adult dc and treat them the same financially - even though one had a dc and one hasn't!!

I think it’s pretty much up to your dm what she gives you and your dsis. I’d be a bit of a bitch and drop into the conversation that dsis has this 50 grand savings, however!

Maelstrop

me too hahahaaaaa

Yes I'd feel a bit put out in your situation op but there's zilch you can do about it and still keep the high moral ground.
As children I believe we all have an inbuilt sense of fairness, dividing the pie up equally etc but we grow up and realise that's not the way of the world. It's entirely up to your DM how she spends her money, fair or not. You need to accept this difference, rise above it and take pride in your financial independence or it will eat away at you.

Same thing in our family. DSis is treated like a child and I'm treated like a family friend.

Unfortunately it's never really going to work out fair- there's one of her (dsis) and 3 of you, so for your dm to take you on holiday or buy a suitcase x3 it will work out more then what dsis has had financially although likewise only spending on dsis isn't fair on you.

Would you be willing to holiday alone with your Mum?

If so, does she know this?

Holidaying isn't the issue. Its the fact that i am trying to be financially independent because i have a job etc and DSis seems to be being treated like a child

Buy her a doll/Teddy for her birthday and go along with the charade!!