In the process of splitting with DP. We have a 4 month old baby. He’s sleeping on the sofa (partner, not the baby!) He’s originally from London and we live in Scotland. His family are coming up at the weekend to visit (Mum, Dad, Bro & Sis).
Originally I threw him out and his work put him up in a hotel for the week. After this however, he had nowhere to go so came back on the proviso he slept on the sofa and found somewhere else to live ASAP. Also, he was not to add to my load so tidying up after himself etc which he promised he would do.
We’ve just got through Christmas together and I’ve tried to be as civil as I can (for my daughters sake). We just had a chilled day and cooked together. He cleaned up the kitchen that night whilst I went to bed with the LO.
Yesterday I went to my Mums for dinner and to exchange presents. Took my daughter with me. He had been invited but declined the invitation due to the situation. So stayed at home and played computer games. I came back after 5 hours and the kitchen was a mess, the oven had been left on for god knows how long and he’s sitting on his arse playing a game but proudly stated “I’ve tidied up!” I asked him what he’d done as the living room clearly hadn’t been tidied nor the kitchen. Transpired that he’d moved all the cardboard boxes for recycling into our daughters room so they weren’t in the way in the kitchen and made the bed. To me that doesn’t constitute tidying up. I told him before I left he didn’t have to do anything whilst we were out as he was going back to work today and only stopped on Christmas Eve night after working for 7 days so I did feel a bit sorry for him and thought he deserved a rest. I bit my tongue and again took LO up to bed and dealt with the night feeds myself. I’d rather he just didn’t say he’d tidied up as I feel it was taking the piss and I did tell him not to do anything.
He left for work at 7.30 this morning so was working early. I was up in the night and had to go to the kitchen - which was even more of a mess. He didn’t clean/tidy before he left. He phoned earlier to ask me to do something and I reminded him of how he said he wouldn’t be adding to my load and how he would help out. He didn’t take this well and commented on how I was running him down 
.
Anyway....I’m knackered, grumpy and resentful. AIBU if I go and stay at my Mums this weekend and get some rest? She lives round the corner so I wouldn’t be far away. My baby has expressed milk which I can provide. I just don’t want to play happy families. His family know what’s going on but I don’t trust myself not to make a sarky comment whilst he plays “Father of the Year” in front of then. I’m thinking would be a much better atmosphere if I weren’t there. Whilst not to drip feed we lived with his brother for a year in London and he and I really don’t get on. To the point I get majorly anxious around him (he’s a massive cokehead) and would threaten me when my partner wasn’t around - he’s 6’3 and I’m 5ft. I’m just not comfortable around him and can’t get past that really and I’m someone who wears their emotions. Nobody had told me his bro was coming up until he FaceTimed ex on Christmas night and I was in the room and heard. It’ll be his parents second time seeing their granddaughter so I want the time to be nice for everyone involved.
Anyway, sorry for the length of this! Thank you in advance if you reply. I’ve put the link for a previous post I’ve written below (if it helps for more info)
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3106685-Baby-is-3-months-old-and-he-s-leaving-me