Husband going through midlife crisis

[Ordinarymamma]

Please someone help me, im going insane here!! Got 2 children, 19 and 13. I love doing family things like we always have done, even though the children are getting a bit older. My husband on the other hand, appears to be bored with it all. He, all of a sudden, has to go to the pub and watch football everyine his team is on and then continue to stay out in different pubs because of course random bands are in that he now also loves listening to. I'm just moaning for no reason and also I am very boring. Because why dont I come out with him?? These are all his words. So I yhen have to remind him that actually we have got children at home and on a sunday afternoon there are other things in the house that needs to get done. Not getting pissed in a pub. We have been together 25 years. Ì woyld never have chosen a man who prefers the pub to his family. The final straw came on Christmas day evening. Our oldest daughter had gone to her bf so it was myself, him and the youngest at home, chilling on the sofa, eating rubbish and watching tv. He then all of a sudden got up, went to the fridge, took some beers out and went to our neighbours who were having a Christmas gathering. My youngest was tired so went to bed so i was left all by myself on Christmas day evening. Ì now actually hate him. Ì spent boxing day looking for places to rent. We have not spoken since although no arguments either. Am i completely wrong for disagreeing with this? I cant listen to him saying this because i actually want to cause him harm when he does. Maybe if you all agreed with him, I will understand that I have turned in to a boring old nag. Please help me!!! I cant live like this anymore.

I also don't see that he's doing anything particularly wrong. The thing I think you're struggling with is the change of pace. You're content to sit at home in front of the telly but he's looking for more varied outlets of interest.

Have you fallen into that trap where you've grown apart but didn't really realised because everything you did was centered around the kids and it's only when the kids are older that you start realising you have little in common?

Could it be that you are holding on to your family life whereas he is wanting to do things are adults again? My kids are 17 and 14 and even the 14yo doesn't care much to do things as a family any longer and wouldn't care less if we went out Xmas eve or Xmas night. Maybe he went to his room because he could feel there was a terrible atmosphere between you two?

The main complain from wives in these circumstances is that their husband are going through a midlife crisis. The husbands complain that all their wives can do is moan, have faces of thunder, forgotten what having fun is (and some add are only good at spending their money).

Time to reassess your marriage and make the efforts to save it before it's too late.