How to get the presents you want.

[runwalkrun]

Next year I'm going to issue a list of things NOT to buy me.

I don't want any of the following

Body Shop
Bayliss & Harding
Chocolae
Ted Baker
Avon

Every year I end up with tons of the above and every year it ends up in the bin or the jumble sale. It's such a waste. I would rather have two (or even one) item of something I love than a pile of random rubbish that I'll never use.

Wibu to make a list next year?

Things I like

Gift vouchers
Gin
Clarin's/Clinique/Lancome/Mac

Has anybody done this? How did it work out?
Did it make things easier or did it comes across as grabby?

Amazon wish list. I add stuff to it throughout the year, a significant amount of my presents came from it this year but still surprised me as they were things I had added to it 6+ months ago.

We all make lists in our family, no one wants to buy something that isn't going to be liked.

In my family, I ask them/they ask me - probably October ish - what they want for Christmas
I tell them
We don’t do massive spend (£25-40) for sisters
I tell them what DC want and send screenshots
Imo it’s a bit rude to ask for things that are hard to get or will lead to lots of choice by purchaser. I have no intention of making family traipse round shops for hours choosing stuff and I know they don’t like it
I choose for one sister but she’s easily pleased tbh with kiehls/ EA 8 hour cream or product / Harvey Nichols Xmas gift sets
Depends on relationships in family though

I send DH a link to the exact dressing gown I wanted, with details of the size to buy.

I received it!

We all just trade lists around October time.

Tell your DH so if people ask him for ideas he can tell them (and while you're there tell him what to buy you).

Buy the sort of thing you would like for others, and then say how much you like it so you hope they will too. Hopefully people will cotton on.
At the very least if you give them Clinique and they get you Body Shop they will hopefully realise the disparity and rectify next year.

Pick one thing you love and say to people you'd be happy with just that this year - for example my mum likes on brand of gin. She says to everyone she'd be happy with just a new bottle of X. She gets several, but at least she likes it and drinks it eventually, and she gets other things as well.

We make lists. I hate wasting money, and giving people things they dont like or want.

I know many people think you have to be grateful for what you get, but I dont agree. Its one thing to teach children to be polite and not yell 'I hate it'; its another to teach people they have to gratefully accept rubbish such as out of date food.

I just use dh credit card now and order some things. Can't help what others buy but mainly regift them anyway

Just be warned that some people still won't stick to the list. Every year we are asked by brother in law for a list. We give a list with lots of different priced things on so as not to assume a budget (so from £3 up to about £30 with lots of choice) every single bloody year I get a pile of crap that goes straight to the charity shop. OH did better this year and has about a 90% success rate with his brother. I got absolutely nothing of use. I would rather they saved their money.

DH and I send each other links to what we want, exact details. No disappointments. In-laws give me vouchers, that’s fine by me. The only surprises really are from my sister’s family and mine but we are really close so we know each other well! We have agreed that SILs will only buy for DD so there’s not the awkward exchange of gift sets any more.

I deleted my Amazon list. DH's family repeatedly looked at the list then shopped elsewhere, so I got endless duplicates! Also, three years in a row my MIL rang to say that she couldn't find my list. All three years she was on the American site. The final straw was when she rang to say she had bought a book I'd never heard of "because it's on your list". The header on my list had my full name, the town where I live and the fact that I'm married to her son, with his name! She ordered me a book from someone else's list. They had the same name as me but gave a different home town and bio!

I bought it myself.

My mother would phone to ask what I would like then once I had told her, would say "I've already got your present last week" or some such comment.

Here's how! Stop exchanging gifts. Buy it yourself. Job done. It's a surefire way to stop wasting money because a) it's rather grabby to distribute a list if you haven't been asked b) no one is under any obligation to stick to a list. The only way to end all this ridiculousness over not getting what you want as a present is to stop gift exchanging and buy it yourself. Saves money, saves the planet, everyone's happy, win win.