Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think your DC don’t want to be dragged around shops on Boxing Day

111 replies

AaronPurrSir · 26/12/2017 16:12

Fully prepared to be flamed for this, but having no DC myself I need to know what goes through some parents heads.

I never normally shop on Boxing Day as I don’t agree with it in principle, but I was forced to spend an hour in a town centre earlier today and I couldn’t believe the amount of parents dragging their DC around.

I saw several children who were clearly completely and utterly fed up, crying, tantrumming (and these were children too old for the tantrum stage - think 6-10yo).

They have had a week of over excitement from Christmas, too much sugar, probably more gifts thrown at them than they can handle and are then dragged around a hellishly busy town centre for hours on end because their DM/DF can’t possibly cope without getting 10% off some tat in sports direct. I don’t understand it at all. When I was small, Boxing Day was for eating leftovers, watching films and relaxing. The most we would do would be a walk to get some fresh air, or visit family members we hadn’t seen the day before.

If you want to inflict the horror that is Boxing Day sales on yourself, go for it. But don’t inflict them on your overtired, overstimulated DC.

OP posts:
paperandpaint · 26/12/2017 20:20

I’m a bit torn on this. I hate shopping centres and shopping generally and it wouldn’t be my choice of activity for me and the kids - I’d pick outdoors stuff any day.

But then again I also think that like a lot of mums, I have just spent two or three days trying to create a wonderful Christmas for my children. I’ve done nothing except wrap presents, make decorations and mince/jam pies, shop, cook, tidy up and make the rooms and table look festive etc etc etc! They had a lovely time which I’m really chuffed about. I have however done nothing for myself at all for days. If I did like shopping I might well think that maybe it’s time for me to do something for myself for a few hours and would take the kids with me if no other option. It’s hardly the end of the world.

BTW - What I don’t get on AIBU or mumsnet in general is when people say ‘it’s none of your business’ or ‘what business is it of yours’? It’s AIBU - if everybody kept their opinions to themselves there would be no mumsnet!!

Coloursthatweremyjoy · 26/12/2017 22:32

When did everything start having to be about children? I spend countless hours on my children's needs and indeed wants. So they come shopping for a few hours and don't like it...they'll live.

I remember shopping trips with my parents. Weekly ones in Fine Fair (shows age) goodness it was mind numbing...but it was what it was. As far as I'm aware SS take a dim view of children being left on their own for hours at a time.

littlepoppett · 26/12/2017 22:40

I think you are too quick to judge. We went to a small shopping place today. We are not the kind of people who like staying in all day, so we went out looked round a few shops/had a coffee etc. DD is 21 months and she loved it, getting to walk around and look at the Christmas decorations etc. It was a lovely day.

YouTheCat · 26/12/2017 22:47

Poppett, I don't think op would judge you and your happy child and chilled out mooch about. OP clearly stated that she'd seen fed up children being dragged around the shops. Fine if kids are happy to go shopping or want to. 7th circle of hell if kids don't want to be there and it's really busy.

TheNaze73 · 26/12/2017 22:48

I think shopping on Boxing Day is wrong full stop

soup00 · 26/12/2017 22:49

Agreed! I said the same thing today. Unbelievable! Pushchairs everywhere with screaming kids and parents just abandoning them to go looking at stuff! Just horrendous!!! I felt sorry for the poor kids

RunningOutOfCharge · 26/12/2017 23:12

Why naze?

Rachie1973 · 26/12/2017 23:13

So few kids are 'fed up'. Big deal. Kids often get fed up when they're not doing what they want. It kinda goes with the territory.

A few hours of having to be patient won't hurt a child.

Starlight2345 · 26/12/2017 23:19

I don’t shop on Boxing Day and was visiting relatives today so wasn’t in pj’s However. If I was to A I am a lp and don’t expect others to look after my dc to go shopping when he is more than capable of shopping . I also know most of the run up to Christmas has been about children so sometimes they have to do what parents do . We are going shopping for a particular item tomorrow ds said can we have a look round too

RainyApril · 26/12/2017 23:21

I love it that judgy op was only shopping because of a very excellent incontrovertible reason, but everyone else was shopping because they're slack-jawed sports direct-loving fools.

It doesn't take much imagination to work out that there are loads of reasons why a parent might be shopping with a kid who'd rather be elsewhere.

They're actually on their way to meet friends and family, theatre, cinema, restaurant but have to pass some shops and decide to pop into one.

Kids have vouchers or money to spend and did so cheerfully but are now a bit bored in Boots.

Parents do first day of the sales to pick up clothes or household items at a lower cost, making them more affordable - sorry kids, but you're off school for two weeks so you'll just have to be glum for a few hours today.

I could go on. Loads of reasons.

TheNaze73 · 26/12/2017 23:28

Hi Running

I think it’s bad & sad, that workers in retail have to work on Boxing Day. It’s fuelled by people doing the shopping. If we all were sensible & boycotted the shops for an extra day, there’d be no demand.
Can’t two days without the shops being open, be too big an ask, especially when there are multi channel offerings like online, from the big retailers

YouTheCat · 26/12/2017 23:30

The OP didn't want to be shopping though. I presume it was some kind of enforced outing.

Cantspell2 · 26/12/2017 23:41

I dragged my 21 year old son out to the retail park today to look at sofas and curtains. He would probably prefered to be killing random people whilst play COD. But he survived the experience and his PS4 still worked when we got home.

Juicyfruitloop · 27/12/2017 00:16

Mine were begging to go shopping today, with the vouchers and cash they got. Thankfully I am the boss so we stayed home Grin

RainyApril · 27/12/2017 00:16

Can't spell, how selfish, you should have been at home following a programme of approved activities designed to educate, character build and/or broaden the mind not saving a few hundred quid on a sofa. When will he spend time with his family and go for a frosty walk now eh? Eh?

Cantspell2 · 27/12/2017 00:30

RainyApril ‘‘tis ok as I have arranged for him to start counselling next Tuesday, been in contact with my local MP to get the church on the corner pulled down so that the bells rings next Christmas won’t wake him, cut the electricity supply to the house opposite so their outside light don’t keep him awake and we will do a 5 mile coastal walk tomorrow followed by a game of scrab. With a bit of luck he will be over the trauma by Easter.

Cantspell2 · 27/12/2017 00:32

Scrabble as I don’t think there is such a game as scrab

juliesaway · 27/12/2017 00:39

OP I’m with you on this. I was out and about on Boxing Day and the amount of unhappy children I saw was really sad. I just wonder what goes through people’s minds that it all has to be a family expedition. When we were kids we were left with grandparents, friends of parents who’d host parties for kids over Christmas or babysitters. Saw many people trailing around yesterday looking utterly miserable. More like mindless automaton consumers who’d been ordered to spend by adverts, rather than enjoying family time or a nice experience.

Only1scoop · 27/12/2017 00:44

'slack-jawed sports direct-loving fools.'

Grin
Original poster
AaronPurrSir · 27/12/2017 09:31

If your children were happy to be out and wanted to shop, then clearly I am not talking about them, am I?

Those of you saying that children having to do things they don’t want to builds character and makes them less selfish...normally I would agree 100%. But my local shopping centre really was horrendously busy, people were aggressive, pushy and rude. It genuinely was deeply unpleasant and quite intimidating. You could barely get into shops to look at things as there were so many people. I was only there for an hour and it was more than enough. If someone had forced me to stay there for several hours I would have had a screaming tantrum myself and I’m in my 30s.

There’s a difference between a child having to suck up something they don’t find particularly fun, and forcing them to endure several hours of deeply unpleasant crowds full of grumpy and aggressive people pushing and shoving them all over the place.

But hey, as long as you got your 20% off your new work trousers, huh?! Hmm

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 27/12/2017 09:37

Things children should suck up on Boxing day includes having to visit Great Auntie Mildred who smells of wet dog and makes them eat cabbage, or going for a bracing, family walk or being pleasant to cousins that they don't really like much - not being dragged around shops full of angry people.

I8toys · 27/12/2017 09:39

Mine have never gone shopping with me and especially not in the sales. Its miserable for all concerned. Online all the way. Its not a pastime.

Allthetuppences · 27/12/2017 09:41

I didn't and don't do shopping on a boxing day but my you are quite full of the judgy spirit. Too much sugar. And you know this how? Dragged around? Really, you're sure the children weren't after getting something with Christmas money?
Maybe they too were "forced" just like you against their ethics out to the shops into said sports shop where you just had to be. Who knew unethical sports shops stocked essentials?

Original poster
AaronPurrSir · 27/12/2017 09:48

Allthe If you read my OP, you’ll see I mentioned 10% off at sports direct to make a point, I didn’t say I was actually in there. But if it makes you feel better to be bitchy towards me, you go right ahead sweetheart Smile

OP posts:
Ofthread · 27/12/2017 09:53

When did Boxing Day sales start? Didn't it always used to be January Sales? It seems a bit close to the last round of shopping.