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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think this was Neighbours fault? (diagram included)

166 replies

HiyaMummy · 26/12/2017 15:46

I live on the top floor of a block flats. 2 flats per floor. Rented from a Housing Association. Diagram not to scale

The squares in the corner of the flats are our front doors. Next to our front doors we each get a space, probably the size of an understairs cupboard. The HAs contract with us says this space is for the storage of pushchairs (which I do for DD) and non perishable food and drink items. The alcoves don't have doors on so you can see into each others alcoves and easily access them. We're not allowed to add doors or even poles for curtains/screens - I've asked before, but the HA say the block is secure so anything that gets stolen should be easily found.

Over Christmas I stored some of DDs Christmas Presents and some alcohol there. I left some of the chocolate out there along with some bottles of beer.

Neighbour has a dog. On Christmas Day after coming back from family his dog was off lead and while neighbour unlocked the door, the dog got into my alcove, where he promptly knocked over a crate of beer bottles licked that up and ate some of the chocolate.

This morning neighbour knocks on my door and asks me and DH to pay for the vets bill he's now got as his dog has become very ill from eating and drinking the contents of my alcove.

While I sympathise because it's awful when your pets ill I have a cat and I hate it when she's ill I feel it's the neighbours fault for allowing his dog to be off lead in the communal areas where he may have access to stuff he shouldn't be having such as chocolate.

Neighbour is coming back later to discuss it and I want to know if I'm UR to refuse (we can't really afford vets bills, we have pet insurance for the cat for this very scenario)?

AIBU to think this was Neighbours fault? (diagram included)
OP posts:
slashlover · 26/12/2017 18:42

You're not responsible for his vets bills. But if I had kids and lived there I would be furious you were storing hazardous breakable bottles there and particularly alcohol. TBH, I think you're quite fortunate it was a dog that got in there rather than a child.

It would still be your responsibility to watch your kids. If they broke bottles in a shop would it then be the fault of the shop?

Taylor22 · 26/12/2017 18:46

But if I had kids and lived there I would be furious you were storing hazardous breakable bottles there and particularly alcohol. TBH, I think you're quite fortunate it was a dog that got in there rather than a child.

Better never take your child into Tesco, any pub or restaurant, any friends houses...
No.
If your child leaves your sight and causes damage that is solely your fault.
If your child fell off a bridge would you blame the people who built it?

Talkingfrog · 26/12/2017 18:56

Dog owners responsibility. Dog should be under their control. If it had been in your garden and the fog had found it would they still consider it your fault. If the area is considered by the HA to be your space to store things it amounts to the same thing. They should have apologised to you for the damage and offered to replace instead of asking you to pay vets bills.

Refuse to pay. If he has a problem with that inform the HA. If you feel brave give him the link to this thread as there aren't many responses in his favour.
Hope the dog is better soon.
Good luck.

Tapandgo · 26/12/2017 19:13

Dog out of control and destroyed your property - yet wants you to pay the vet bill? Neighbour must be on glue!

HiyaMummy · 26/12/2017 19:14

Wow thank you for the replies everyone. Sorry for the delay was getting DD to sleep.

Firstly, I've been inspected by the HA since moving in and they've seen I store glass bottles of alcohol, chocolate etc there, they had no problem with it. One woman stores her children's outdoor toys in hers and no-one seems to mind. We don't have much space within the flats themselves for storage so I think the HA let you get on with it as long as it's not perishables. My rent includes a "service charge" which says some of the money for that is used for lighting the "storage areas" which I assume this is, so I am paying for the use of that space.

Secondly I didn't take the pushchair out with me as DHs family gave us lifts yesterday so didn't see the mess until this morning when I actually needed to use the pushchair. He did just leave it but I'm not sure if he knew what had actually happened, as you say he may have been in his flat or bringing presents up from the car. The selection boxes were ripped but the actual chocolate bars from them were scattered over the floor, the dark chocolate was in a cardboard wrapper type thing (it was one of those Lindt 70% bars) and the card was ripped and the foils missing so assuming dog ate that as well (do dogs eat foil?). It was also quite slippy where the alcohol was. I cleaned it up myself as I was worried that if DD had been in there she'd have slipped and quite badly hurt herself, plus I didn't want her picking up the glass and cutting her hands, she's usually good about not touching anything but you never know do you? Also the neighbours with children are a floor below me, so really have no need to be on our floor so I would expect the only child to go into my alcove would be DD.

Lastly, neighbour has been back. He said the dog is suffering from poisoning as a result of digesting chocolate so I assume she ate the dark chocolate bar and the cuts are from the broken glass.

We pointed out the contract and that I am allowed to store things in the alcove, and his dog should of been on a lead. He argued we shouldn't leave chocolate out there and what if my child had got in there? DD is 2, so is walking and does know about the area but is only ever in the communal areas supervised and if she ate a little bit of chocolate it's not going to harm her although I'd be very cross. DH then said that if anyone should be paying anything it should be him replacing the chocolate and alcohol - luckily anything we were given as presents where either in the flat or still at my MILs so the dog only broke the stuff we'd bought. Neighbour said he can't afford the vets bill as he's a single guy on his own. DH then pointed out that it wouldn't be a problem if the dog had been either on a lead on inside his own flat. I asked if insurance would cover it but he just shuck his head so I assume he either doesn't have any or his policy doesn't cover it.

We both said we were sorry the dog was ill and understood how upsetting it is, but we wouldn't be paying the vets bills. I said we were happy to ignore the damage if it was the last of the matter. He left muttering about us being irresponsible and how could we let an animal suffer.

So I'm sure it's not the end of it. Not sure whether to log it with the Housing Association in the morning but then I don't want him to have to get rid of his pet as I'd be so upset if we had to get rid of the cat due to a complaint. And I do worry he might try and put a counter complaint in about the cat out of spitefulness, although the cats indoor only, never goes into the communal area and won't even step onto our balcony so he'd struggle but I'd not put it past the HA to tell us to get rid of her to stop complaints escalating.

OP posts:
lollipop7 · 26/12/2017 19:20

If he can’t afford vet’s bills he shouldn’t have a dog. They incur something known as cost.
Oh and responsibility.

I suspect he’s likely to get into more hot water for allowing his dog to effectively roam freely and unsupervised in a communal areas of a block of flats than you are nor anything.

Munchyseeds · 26/12/2017 19:29

Don't give him anymore head room...bet it's the last you hear from him....you did nothing wrong at all and the bill is his prblem

Tistheseason17 · 26/12/2017 19:36

Well done OP
I think it will go quiet now

ZenNudist · 26/12/2017 19:41

Cant you log it with HA as an info only. State its not a complaint about the dog or the neighbour but you want this interaction on public record. Including the resolution that you have no responsibility for paying his vets bills and have only agreed to not persuing the man for payment for your missing goods if the matter can be considered closed. You dont know what kind of nutcase he is and if he seeks revenge on you later you will have a record which goes to motive. Im not trying to worry you its just a belt and braces approach.

flumpybear · 26/12/2017 19:48

If he can't afford a dog he shouldn't have one. It should have been on a lead, what if he hurt your child? You're entitled to put non perishable food there, I'd assume
That to be stuff that can be stored out of the fridge, chocolate is relatively non perishable in that case - he's in the wrong and should have his dog controlled - it's not your job to ensure your property is dog proof, he needs to keep his pet under control

tabulahrasa · 26/12/2017 19:51

He should have been supervising the dog and you're not liable for the vet's bill IMO.

But, with respect to leaving the mess... unless it's a huge dog, that's an awful lot of chocolate and he'll have very likely rushed the dog straight to the vets as soon as he found it.

HiyaMummy · 26/12/2017 20:17

It's a middly size dog, DH (who loves dogs and would happily have one) says it's an Irish Red Setter.

She seems a really nice dog, saw DD in her pushchair outside the block the other day and stood there while DD petted her with no reaction from the dog at all so I'm assuming it was a lapse in judgement from the Neighbour not deliberate.

OP posts:
Badweekjustgotworse · 26/12/2017 21:02

hiya if it is an Irish red setter they are notorious for being totally barmy and if any breed ever needed Insurance then it’s them. They’re nuts and generally behave like unruly toddlers.

our neighbour had one for years and it used to jump their gates and bolt down the road at least once a week. I’m amazed it lasted as long as it did before meeting an untimely death on the road when it was hit by a Car....

which incidentally, the driver claimed damages for as dogs are the responsibility of their owners and should always be kept on their leads, so poor neighbour had massive vets bills because of the the dog being hit and subsequent failed surgery to save it AND had damages to pay to the driver.

shakingmyhead1 · 26/12/2017 21:05

ToadOfSadness she could have had a full box of meat sitting there and it still wouldnt have been her fault! the law states that dogs must be kept under control at all times and clearly this dog wasnt under control at all and also it was set free for long enough to break a box of beer and rip two boxes of chocolates open and eat part of a block of chocolate... not under control... the owner should have been there before he got to anything... if that had been a child being bitten how long would it have taken for the dogs owner to stop it? too long!
HiyaMummy pay the dogs owner nothing and if he kicks up a fuss inform him the cost of what the dog destroyed and remind him that HE is responsible for everything his dog does in the building ( and out) NOT YOU!

MrsU88 · 26/12/2017 21:12

it is not your responsibility to pay for someone elses vets bills....that is what insurance is for. If he hasn't got insurance then that is his problem not yours.

also...does he think a couple with a young child, who is also living in HA house so I'm guessing on a low income too to get a HA house (I mean no offense, please correct if I am wrong) so why would you have the spare money to pay for his dogs vet bills?

Maelstrop · 26/12/2017 21:14

Setters are quite crackers. It’s not your problem. You were storing stuff that’s allowed by the HA. I think I’d contact the HA to request doors/locks. It’s stupid to imagine all of the neighbours are going to be honest/not have children who might wander in. Again, he should have had the dog under control. She must have been in there a while to break the bottles/eat enough chocolate to make her sick. The drip is probably a cautionary move by the vet. Not your problem if he doesn’t have insurance.

TatterdemalionAspie · 26/12/2017 21:20

He is a fecking loon! He needs to keep the dog on a lead and out of people's stuff. Our dog is a thieving hound and will snaffle down anything she can grab (which then makes her really ill). When she does that, the only people to blame are us - it's our responsibility to make sure that she doesn't knick stuff and eat things that are bad for her. You've handled it really well, and he's trying it on!

buttfacedmiscreant · 26/12/2017 21:21

I agree with the others. If he brings it up again I might say to him "If you keep pursuing this then I will complain to the HA authority about you having your dog off-leash/unsupervised in common areas. You need to keep your dog out of my space and under your control."

buttfacedmiscreant · 26/12/2017 21:23

(I have two dogs and I would not blame anyone (except me) for leaving something in their own space that my dogs ate. Now if they threw it into my garden or something...)

Ghostontoast · 26/12/2017 21:29

I would inform the HA of the incident l, after all he should keep the animal under control.

mistyweather · 26/12/2017 21:42

Not your problem. They should have been watching a dog

InspMorse · 26/12/2017 22:00

The fact that he allows his dog to roam around unsupervised for enough time to create the mess/distruction you describe is the problem.
You have done nothing wrong.

VivaLeBeaver · 26/12/2017 22:14

Also if he says his dog is suffering from poisoning I am guessing he didn’t take his dog to the vet immediately after he ate the chocolate. If you take a dog to the vet within two hours of eating it the chocolate hasn’t had time to be digested enough to cause poisoning.....the vet gives the dog an injection to make it vomit. Job done. And not an expensive bill either.....though if it was out of hours it would be I guess.

But if he put off going to the vet hoping things would be ok then he’s silly. He gambled and now has an ill dog and a bigger bill. Not your fault.

StaplesCorner · 27/12/2017 00:43

The vet will normally offer a payment plan, but of course he should have had insurance - dogs are expensive to keep and care for - especially setters - and these things happen, sometimes they happen a lot. My dog ate a zinc tablet and some grapes when he was a puppy within 6 weeks of each other, just things we'd dropped and he'd got to first; each incident cost nearly £400, all covered by the insurance.

But this dog must have been going apeshit for maybe 10 minutes to have ingested glass/beer and all that chocolate and then by the sounds of it the guy didn't even notice just let the dog back in the flat then found he was ill later. What if you had stored raisins there? They can be fatal to dogs, sometimes more so than chocolate. The list of what can harm a dog when left unsupervised (and its the unsupervised bit that's important) is very long. And what if you'd left a bag of chocolate/beer etc on the doorstep as you went inside with DD, you came out, the dog was in the bag - would that mean you had to pay the vet bill too?

Are all tenants meant to change what they store in these areas to take account of an off lead dog that might want to come and have a look around at any point? The vet will not let the dog suffer, he will care for him and even if the guy can't pay the bill he will make an arrangement, vets have a duty of care to do this.

harrietsoton · 27/12/2017 04:08

Neighbour said he can't afford the vets bill as he's a single guy on his own.

There you go. That’s the crux of it. He’s pinning the blame on you to get you to foot the bill, but what happened was not your fault. You didn’t purposely poison the dog.

He left muttering about us being irresponsible and how could we let an animal suffer.

The exact same could be said about him, why wasn’t he being responsible and supervising his own dog? Sounds like the dog was there for a while too - why didn’t he retrieve him sooner? The dog is suffering thanks to his owners own inaction