To think you don't keep giving a Christmas card to someone that never gives one back?

[littleredelf]

So if you send a Christmas card to say 40 people, and (neighbours/colleagues etc,) and 3 don't send them back, would you send one again next year, and then the next year and the next???

Seems pointless to me, as they are not sending one for a reason; they either don't 'do' Christmas cards, or they don't particularly like you. (Maybe there are other reasons, I don't know....) So why keep sending one?

My cousin keeps sending a neighbour of hers one (a woman around 50-ish who lives alone,) and complains CONSTANTLY that she doesn't send one back, saying 'it's very puzzling, I wonder if I have offended her, she seems ok normally!'

Personally, I would send a card, and if I didn't get one back, I would send another the following year. But if they didn't send one to me again, then I would not send one again, unless I got one first (as they are obviously not bothered about them...)

So AIBU to think it's daft to keep sending one when people don't send one back - ever (and then keep complaining that they never sent you one! )

The middling category you refer to therefore doesn't exist.

For you evidently, but it does for us, we are not all the same! Another example is, we outsource various tasks throughout the year for our business and it's good to keep in touch , especially with those people who become friends. But sometimes it's not appropriate the following year.

And of course keeping track is not done in a nit- picking tit-for-tat kind of way, I send cards because I genuinely want to send people our good wishes, and don't care if I get one back. But I do care if I have forgotten someone or not reciprocated when someone has sent us one.

Why is everyone so desperate to attribute mal intent to keeping a list out of basic politeness?

As an aside, a close friend of ours died this year, and he didn't have a spouse or family, and I don't know what we would have done about funeral arrangements if we hadn't had his Christmas card list!