To feel a bit deflated about Christmas this year?

[DonkeyPunch88]

As the title says really. We're struggling financially this year after a series of unexpected large bills, so I've saved as much as physically possible for Christmas but it was always going to be tight.

I have 4 DCs so the 3 bigger ones have all been given 1 main present each (£50 per child) and a stocking full of books, chocolates, games, PJS, smellies etc. Littlest DC is only a baby so just had her main present from us.

This is the first Christmas we have all spent together, usually 3 older DC go to their Dad's house. I was really looking forward to a proper family Christmas. I bought as much yummy food as I could for our budget, their main presents are all the ones they asked for. We did hot chocolate and marshmallows with Christmas films last night, I just wanted a nice no frills but happy family Christmas.

So far all the kids have done is scream, fight and argue. They are 10, 8 and 5 by the way. Oldest just complained that he hasn't got much, main present is exactly what he asked for but apparently it's the wrong colour white?! (Scooter)
Middle child is sulking because something wasn't right with stuff in her stocking.
Little one is grumpy because he was too rough taking a toy out the box and immediately broke it. They keep screaming and shouting, the eldest has just told me I've not tried hard enough this year! He doesn't realise I haven't eaten anything but toast some days just so I could afford all this.
They've got everything they've asked for and yet they are being complete spoilt brats it's just so bloody heartbreaking. I know they are just children and I wasn't expecting fawning gratitude but I just feel so sad and deflated.

Sorry if it was a bit long

expat, I am so sorry for your loss, I think I remember reading some of your threads before x I have experienced a late loss, not quite the same, I know but Christmas somehow brings my loss home to me (and the loss of other loved ones) more than ever x

The fact your ten year old said you hadn't tried hard enough is just something has gone very wrong for a kid of that age if be shouting this at his mum on xmas day. Jesus. Don't brush this under the carpet once they calm down OP. This is an insight into his mentality.

to those experiencing a loss this Christmas, I'm very sorry.

lemonshark that's his mentality all over unfortunately, nothing is ever good enough. It becomes very wearing.

DonkeyPunch88 So what's your plan to do something about it, to shape him into a better person while he's still young? Did you read my suggestion?

Yes, I think that's a very good idea. We've had a chat about his comments today and why it upset me. They received a fair bit of money for Christmas from relatives so I've suggested we take some of that to but some toys for the local women's refuge where the kids don't get anything at Christmas.

*buy

It is shit here too, but for different reasons.

My gorgeous elderly ginger cat suddenly became very ill late last night and had to be put to sleep by the out of hours vet this morning.

To all suffering loss

That includes you, Topsey

Oh my gosh Topseyt I'm so so sorry for your loss 😓 Xx

Money is a different concept to kids, I think it'd have a bigger impact to give away an actual tangible toy they were given, than to use money to buy something new to give away. But either way it sounds like you're considering some consequences to try and teach them so you can have a better Christmas next year and raise caring grateful kids.