To ask you about your bad sleeper?

[Candyfloss1122]

I am expecting dC2 next year, and the only experience I have of baby sleep is Dc1. She is an ok sleeper, still up once or twice at 11 months but its fine for us. She's a terrible napper...but that's a whole other issue for which I have very low expectations!

I know that all babies are different, and that dC2 will most likely be nothing like Dc1, so I'd like to ask you about your bad sleeper. What is their sleep like?

I like to prepare for the worst, its just my personality, so please fill me in on life with a bad sleeper, routines, lack of routines etc

Dd1 had her day and night confused as a baby so we would often be up till 5am in the early weeks. She was good as gold during the day and people wouldnt believe me when I said how bad she was at night! She'd also take forever to settle between feeds and wake up as soon as her head hit the mattress.

DD2 who is 12 weeks old doesn't have that issue and will settle between 8-10pm and be up every few hours for a feed and go straight back to sleep. Instead she's really fussy come evening time and can also be moany during the day.

I'm sure we've learnt a lot of tricks since our first DD (white noise, sleepyhead etc) but I truly believe every baby is totally different. That's been my experience!

Ok well you asked!!

DD1 was and is a nightmare sleeper. Till 4 months she would only sleep on my chest at night (and as she got older, not even there), and only in a moving buggy in the day. Would ping awake if put down or if buggy stopped. 4 months onwards she was much better but still not great. Getting her to nap was always a fight but she really needed it so as not to get overtired. Life revolved around her nap - not too late or she wouldn't sleep at bedtime, but late enough that she was tired. Needed the buggy to drop off for her nap (apart from age 1-2ish). Insanely early waker, we had to push bedtime to 8.30 to get her to sleep to 6.30. Now age 5 she still struggles to sleep at night and has been prescribed melatonin.

DD2 unlike DD1 likes sleep and if everything is ok, she will sleep well. However she is a princess and the pea type and will wake if she is even slightly teething, ill, overtired, etc. And she has been ill a lot. So we have had a lot of dreadful nights with her, and still do sometimes, but I can see that past a certain age she will probably be a good sleeper.

DS1 was terrible he'd fight sleep until it was inevitable. DS2 would be on the go until he was put to bed and then he'd go out like a light. DD loves her sleep and once she could she'd often put herself to bed

Dd1 was awake every 2 hours without fail until she was 5 and a half.
Dd2 slept like a dream until about 3 years of age and then seemed to have separation anxiety type thing going on.
I ended up having a bed on her room, I have not long moved out, she is 11 now.
It all seems a distant memory and I has no issues in doing whatever was necessary to give them both (and me) a good night's sleep.

My 11 month old is still up 2-3 times a night on average. My 6yo was the same and finally started sleeping through at 2.5! Feeding choice are no difference either. BF into almost 6 months followed by ff and weaning. No impact at all.

Ds1 was a dream, slept through from 4 months old and now he's 9 and still brilliant... ds2 is 2y7m and still up at least twice every night but it's anything up to two hours at a time. Even the HV is at a loss because we have tried everything. We just hope he grows out of it one day. So no, definitely don't get two the same.

DC1 was a brilliant sleeper.
DC2 was ok ish up until 10 months, then screamed every time she was put in her cot past 11pm (she’d settle fine initially). Was often awake for 2-3 hours in the middle of the night.
DS3 (currently 10 months) is co sleeping as he has refused to sleep in a cot since birth. He didn’t sleep in the hospital, Moses basket, side crib, or cot. He wakes up 4-5 times a night to bf to sleep. I can’t lesve his side or he wakes up. It’s tough but I’m just trying to power through and keep in mind an end is in sight.

Both my boys have been angelic, the can be hurtling around the bedroom as hyper as anything but as soon as they get in bed, they're asleep in about 10 minutes and stay there. They go to bed about 7.30 and then I wake them at 7am for school. I know it's bad if one of them calls me in the night as it's usually only if someone has been sick!

The girls however are a different ball game DD1 didn't sleep through the night until she was 3. She would often still be awake at midnight despite a strict routine. She is a chronic sleepwalker meaning I have to go fetch her several times on a bad night as she wanders about the house, she also dreams very vividly meaning she quite often will sing, shout and laugh loudly whilst asleep. She is also an early riser and never sleeps past 6am
DD2 is only a baby but she's either one or the other. Some nights she settles and does 8pm til 6/7am and doesn't stir or wake. Then the next night she might wake every 2 or 3 hours and need feeding or cuddling back to sleep.
In our house it's a proper mix!

Dc1 was hysterical on her back but slept instantly when placed on her side. Only discovered this at around 3 months after surviving on 3 hours of broken sleep a night. I then started wedging her on her side with a towel and a bag of rice. Worked brilliantly for about a month until she became heavier and the rice wouldn't hold her in place. We then had 2 months of her waking up and screaming hysterically approximately 15 times a night because she had rolled onto her back. I had to get up, put her on her side. I literally couldn't finish a sentence I was so tired. It resolved itself overnight when she learned how to roll over by herself.

Dc2 with the benefit of hindsight almost certainly had a milk intolerance / allergy. He would scream a lot and projectile vomit 45 mins after every feed. So, I'd feed him in the night, hold him upright for 45 mins, he'd vomit over everything (me, him, my bed, his bed etc), I'd have to change all bedding / clothes, then feed him again because he'd vomited up his feed and the whole process would start again. Those weren't a very happy 6 months either.

Dc3 was better but by then I had exceptional low expectations.

My dc (nearly 4) was the sleeper from hell until just after her 3rd birthday.

She slept for 20 minutes at a time and no more from the day she was born until 6 months. From 6 months on she would sleep for an hour or two but only in our bed and only with a boob in her mouth, this would be accompanied by a singular nap, usually in the car and usually disturbed as I had to remove dc for the school run.

That lasted until age two when we finally got her to stay in her cot for a couple of hours. She would scream until around 11pm every night before she'd finally (after sitting on her floor with her/picking her up and putting her down/feeding her) fall asleep from exhaustion until 7am.

We took the sides off her cot at around 34 months which initially caused a regression and resulted in her climbing into our bed every night at about 3am. I tried everything to get her to sleep and none of it worked. Looking back, I can't believe I didn't have a complete breakdown. Some nights I'd sleep on the sofa whilst she ran round the living room, before getting up and doing a full days work.

The stress of broken sleep and having no evenings to ourselves because of her screaming nearly broke up our marriage.

DS1 - Average sleeper - good weeks and bad, slept through at about 5 months

DS2 - Didn't sleep through until about 6, we ended up co-sleeping from about 5 months when I was hallucinating from tiredness. He still crept into bed with us (huge bed tf) up until about 9. He also didn't wean until about 3 yo, has food sensory issues, several food intolerances that he's finally growing out of (wheat and aspartame being the main culprits) suffers with migraines now (prob hormone related) and has been diagnosed with dispraxia aged 13. I think the sleeping/settling issues that he's had might be related to all the above.

We often (only half) joke that he would have been an only if he arrived first!

My pfb went 12 hours a night from about 10 weeks old, but my no2 son was 18 months before he slept longer than 2 hours at a stretch. The first time he went from midnight to 6am I FLEW to the cot and snatched him up wailing cos I honestly thought he had died in the night
That said, if anyone had told me beforehand how he would n't sleep, I would have said I couldn't cope, but looking back, I just got on with it - his cot was beside the bed, and he would wake, I would shove his dummy in or offer a drink, and we would go back off.
He was 2nd of five DCs and now, looking back, although they all had their moments, I can't really remember any of it - I think the "trick" was having them sleep beside my bed, having a drink or a dummy ready so nuke me dummy and BF haters and just plain "getting on with it""
It passes over so fast really, even though a year/18months/2 years seems like such a long time, but it is actually over with before you know it.
If you get really tired, get your DP or a grandparent or someone anyone lol you trust to mind the baby and have a nap!