WIBU to report this historic sexual assault(?) *possible trigger*

[Namechangegamechange123]

It happened 16 years ago now so i don’t know if there would be any point...

When i was14 I met an older man online (23)... we spoke for ages and ended up ‘in a relationship’
At the time I knew he’d been in prison before for statutory rape... he told me he’d thought she was 16. He knew absolutely how old I was, he used to collect me from school!

We slept together, at the time I would have said it was consensual but as an adult obviously I know it’s wrong.

He was later arrested for another offence against a minor... went to prison again, used to write to me, thankfully at this point my mum found out and put a stop to the ‘relationship’.

Whilst we were ‘together’, a younger girl (13 I think?) came forward and accused him of raping her. I know something happened because I found her school jumper in his room.

I’m so ashamed that I didn’t report anything. It was just all so normalised, and I was so young.

I don’t know much about him now, he added me on Facebook maybe 8 years ago now? And he had small children... I’d like to hope that given he would almost certainly be on the sex offenders register that he wouldn’t have contact with them but what if he does?!

Is it even assault if I consented? I didn’t even know what to call it in my title.

I don’t want to waste anyone’s time

You couldn't consent because you were 14. This is both from a legal perspective and just a common sense one.

You wouldn't be wasting anyone's time and you might help another victim - your evidence could be what pushes the case forward for, for example, the girl raped at 13.

I'm sorry this happened to you. I think if you are prepared to, you should report it. There's a chance it wouldn't go anywhere which I you'd need to be prepared for.

You can't consent at 14.

You won't do any harm in reporting it, maybe help in fact. But equally it might be a big lot of stress for you and then a damp firework, if you see what I mean. Which isn't a reason not to report, more to be aware of the possibility that it very likely won't result in much.

That, however, is a reflection of the legal system, NOT the reality of what happened. He groomed you and then raped you.

It wasn't your fault, even a tiny bit. These people are very manipulative and focus on a goal that as a child/teenager you were biologically (because your brain isn't fully developed at that age) unable to see or understand. An same goes for if you found it enjoyable or liked the attention. None of that matters. It was abusive. Which it seems you know, but just in case you have a flicker of doubt.