This is more of a rant but here goes...
DM, dd and myself have developed a bit of a yearly ritual of going to the panto on Christmas Eve. I have always paid, not necessarily intentionally but there has never been any offer off dm to pay me back for her ticket. So I have always counted the ticket as part of her Christmas present whether she realises this or not.
This year my sister and aunty wanted to join in on the trip so I booked 5 tickets (back in Feb!) and the plan was to go to dinner in the restaurant next door afterwards. Nobody paid/offered me any money for their ticket. I did tell them I would need the money by a certain date as the transaction was on my credit card. My Aunty said that she would pay for mine and dd's meal after the show so that was fine.
About 3 months ago my sister dropped out, leaving one spare ticket. I could not find another relative/friend to take over the ticket so was technically at a financial loss.
The main problem has been DM. Last month she suddenly said that she didn't want to have dinner afterwards anymore as she was seeing her partner in the evening and wanted to go out to eat with him. She didn't want to eat twice.
We then quickly discussed going for lunch before hand instead (a bit of a rush as panto starts at 1). My Aunty could not do this as she was working until 12. Stupidly I agreed to make both plans as not wanting to upset either one. Last week I cancelled the early lunch with my mum. I am 9 months pregnant (due next week!) and, aside from being extremely tired and uncomfortable, did not want to have to leave my house for 10am and not return until 6.
DM seemed understanding of this and no more was said until today when I was trying to sort arrangements for getting there. I can't drive so dh was going to drop me and dd at the theatre and I arranged with Aunty for her to drive with dm.
I then clearly made the huge mistake of asking dm if her partner would be able to pick her up after the panto or would she like us to get her a taxi (she lives roughly a mile away from theatre) as obviously the three of us would be staying in town for dinner. My dm went ballistic at me saying how inconsiderate I was, I've completely let my Aunty take over the day and that my dh should be coming to pick her up (he will be at work by then) and how do I think she feels being made to go home alone whilst we all enjoy dinner together, how could I prioritise dinner with my aunt over lunch with her etc etc.
That was bad enough. I was stunned and didn't really know what to say. I tried to rationally explain that my mum had been the one to change the original plan in the first place! Then dsis got in on the act and phoned me screaming that she would come and pick dm up after the show, how could I be so mean to make her go home alone, dm Is really upset, it's not her fault she couldn't afford to join us for dinner (???) we are rubbing it in her face by going to dinner without her blah blah blah.
My mum and her partner have a table booked at a very expensive restaurant less than two hours after we will be eating our dinner.
It didn't seem to matter what I said to explain the situation, I have no idea what is happening.... And now my aunty has just said to forget about dinner afterwards if it's causing so much hassle! So tomorrow has basically cost me £150 for us all to go and be miserable with each other!
AIBU to just book 2 tickets for myself and dd for next years panto and telling the rest of them to stick it where the sun doesn't shine??