Risk food poisoning to placate DH?

[CheekyFuckersAreEntertaining]

SIL has terrible food practices. She's always got the runs but claims it's got nothing at all to do with the fact she leets her dog lick her tongue after he's just licked dog shit off his own arse. She doesn't follow standard food hygiene practices either, like refrigerating roasts between servings.

We've arrived at hers and there's a bag of chicken dippers on the side, partially defrosted FOR COOKING. I've told DH to go out and buy us some lunch but he's insisting we have to eat what she's offering. I've told him that I don't want diahorrea and cramps for Christmas. I've told SIL a million times before that when chicken defrosts the outside defrosts first and the inside remains frozen longer. When cooking the defrosted outside cooks but the inside is still frozen/uncooked. AIBU saying we don't want to risk it?

The chicken in a dipper is already cooked! You're just re heating them in the oven!

I wouldn't eat at dogshit queen's house either!

Anything left over from a roast in my house gets left out until it's eaten, or binned a day or two after.

The dippers will be fine too, I wouldn't eat that processed shit but if you eat them they are not going to poison you.

Blugh! Have the argument. Can you offer to take everyone out for lunch? I would be throwing money at this problem, or just walking out .

I think the chicken dippers would be fine, if 'fine' is the right word. Who serves up chicken dippers to guests at all, it sounds awful. It's the lack of hygiene generally would put me off. Why did you arrange this? Did you know you'd have to eat there?

Dog licking aside you'd better not come round to eat at my house then.

Do you have a reason for being so uptight, nothing is going to happen to anyone who eats partly defrosted chicken dippers, what a non issue.

And even leaving food out at this time of year's got to be pretty low risk too. Maybe me and my DC have cast iron stomachs but no one's ever suffered from a slightly less than anal approach to food.

oh and YABU to have even considered a meal at her house! Why do this to yourself?! You know what her standards are like, you know she's regularly making herself ill. You know she hasn't listened to your advice in the past.

What on earth made you think it would be different today?!

There's a lot of this on MN, posters who keep trying to make other people change their behaviour, then getting upset when they don't, rather than changing their own behaviour /expectations towards that person.

Your SIL will never serve a 'safe' meal. You know this. You know you won't want to eat a dangerous meal. So why are you arranging to go for a meal and not thinking before you arrive and she's 'catered' for you, that you won't want to eat it?

Arrange to meet in restaurants, or plan your visits to avoid meal times, perhaps bringing cake with you.

Don't do exactly the same thing, yet expect different behaviour from her.

Gross she sounds filthy. I wouldn't eat there and wouldn't care who got offended. Is she really serving you all that for a lunch?

It sounds grim and I say this as someone who gets a chicken out of the fridge an hour before cooking it (I hate cooking meat that is really fridge cold). I'll also leave a cooked chicken/roast on the side for up to two hours before putting it in the fridge.

Disclaimer: I don't do this during a heatwave.

Ew! No I wouldn’t eat there. I hate mucky houses and the dog licking is hideous.

The rest of it sounds extremely grim, but the chicken dippers definitely aren't going to make you sick. Not really sure why you think they would.

I'm with you OP. I think the chicken dippers are a bit of a red herring. The fact is she's unclean, with very questionable food safety practices and you feel uncomfortable eating the food she makes - for good reason. I wouldn't even want to use her cutlery let alone eat anything she makes.
In short: YANBU.

That made me feel ill,about teh dog.But you know what shes like why take the risk.And im pretty lax about most things.Does she wash her hands before handling food,thats what i would be concerned about.Not chicken dippers.

I have IBS and have funny guts at the best of times I wouldn’t eat at your SIL or anyone like it, a bout of food poisoning would floor me for weeks.
Can’t you say you feel a bit queasy today and don’t fancy eating anything, that’s the excuse I always use!
My friend often has a pot of chicken curry or chilli on the hob which has been out for a day or two, she just reheats it and serves, never refrigerates, never had food poisoning, they must have guts of iron.