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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have embarrassed myself? (lighthearted)

21 replies

ShimmerShineandMe · 20/12/2017 18:47

Have name changed for this.

DD is 2.6, has a developmental delay and a very bad speech delay, she has other issues as well but they're not relevant here. She says a few 3 word sentences but it's mostly unintelligible nonsense.

She's very affectionate, and is loved by everyone she meets. I love her with all my heart, but I always worry that our relationship isn't as strong as it could be as we spend a lot of time at hospitals with strangers, and I had bad PND after her birth. She goes to a private Nursery 3 days a week, has a small group of children she plays with and is loved by staff, and I often feel she prefers her keyworker or the staff there to me. DH works long hours but when he's home, she runs to him shouting "daddy daddy" I've never had that.

Today after Nursery I took her to the supermarket as I needed some grocery bits. DD was walking which is rare for her and she walked off into the flower bit. She came back with a big bunch of flowers big grin on her face and handed them too me and said "For you mummy". I couldn't control myself for crying, that a member of staff came over and asked if I was ok. DD looked so confused that I was crying.

I feel a bit embarrassed and might have to go back and apologise to the staff member. I was in such a state I couldn't buy the flowers and feel like I ought to as it's not a good message to send DD, as it was such a nice thought.

I know I was UR for crying. But I just feel so proud both for her speech and the fact that she saw something she thought I'd like.

Feel free to boast about your own DC too, I love hearing about others achievements.

OP posts:
missiondecision · 20/12/2017 19:00

What a lovely moment for you both, don’t think about what anyone else was thinking.

Beerwench · 20/12/2017 19:02

Well not the same as from your DD obviously but here Flowers for you.
And a wonderful well done for her achievement!
I know what you mean about the not feeling as close because you get a different reaction to others. It stings like hell when they run up to someone else with delight and don't to you. My DD was the same for a few years and it really upset me. She used to cry coming back to me from nursery sometimes or from my family. I think back now though and realise that from a child POV everything I did and sacrificed was 'hidden' and she saw and reacted to what was in front of her. At nursery she had other children to play with and adults on hand all the time, at home with me I had 101 things to do as well (lone parent) so no, unfortunately she didn't get my undivided attention. At Grandma's or Auntie's she was the only child, and they did things while she wasn't there so they could give her their undivided attention. Unfortunately, after working an 8 hour shift after dropping her at nursery I'd have shopping to get on the way home, dinner to cook, washing to sort out and any other jobs that had to be done - I'd have loved to play with her and give her a long and fun bath time and read more than one rushed story at bed time - but if I did that we wouldn't eat, would have lived in a pig sty and have no clean clothes. Seeing her run up shouting 'Daddy! Daddy!' When she went once a week, for a day, was like a kick in the teeth. But the small moments like you describe made it worth it.
I also had PND and really struggled to cope, I think I became paranoid that I'd ruined any bond we should have had.
It's easier now she's older and has realised a few things on her own. Hang in there OP.

Mousewatch · 20/12/2017 19:03

Ah that's lovely! Bless you and your beautiful DD. I don't think you should go back to apologise but I would go back to buy the flowers. Flowers

Neverender · 20/12/2017 19:04

That's lovely - I'd have cried too Flowers

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 20/12/2017 19:04

Ah, she sounds lovely Smile. Don't even think of apologising to anybody, just treasure the moment.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 20/12/2017 19:10

Oh that’s lovely!

I’m lucky, my DD runs to me, wants me to comfort her, wants me to put her to bed. I do feel very loved but when I have things to do/am completely exhausted and need a break, I would like to be able to ask DP to put her to bed without being able to hear her screaming for me. It breaks my heart and I end up going to her. However, I know she loves her DDaddy and loves spending time with him.

Your DD loves you and knows you love her. Don’t doubt yourself. Xmas Smile

HangryHanderson · 20/12/2017 19:12

Nah life's too short for Blush. You are clearly doing something right Daffodil well done x

shouldiwouldi · 20/12/2017 19:16

You've made me cry too!!! That's really warmed my heart...thank you for sharing this. Your dd loves you xx

MumGoneMild · 20/12/2017 19:19

Ya definitely nbu

It's a big moment, cry away!

Moanyoldcow · 20/12/2017 19:21

That's lovely!!

My son is an extremely fussy eater (some other issues being assessed) but this is all that we really struggle with at home.

The day he ate a fishfinger I cried. Now he's added in pizza and chicken nuggets. Every new food feels like an Olympic gold medal.

MustBeThursday · 20/12/2017 19:25

Well done to your DD! What a lovely little girl you have!

DD1, now 3y9m has a speech delay (first words at 2y6m). She now speaks in short phrases, mostly phrases we use a lot or short sentences. A few days ago she randomly started singing "Twinkle Twinkle Chocolate bar" all the way through. I was speechless!

jarhead123 · 20/12/2017 19:29

Thats lovely OP.

My daughter performed in her Christmas play today, she sang beautifully, so much enthusiasm. My kids drive me mad but they're my world

DeathByMascara · 20/12/2017 19:33

How lovely!! She sounds gorgeous.

I have embarrassed myself several times today crying in public - proper body-shaking sobs. Deep down I’m a bit embarrassed but hey, someone looking weirdly at me isn’t going to ruin my day.

horatioisabrick · 20/12/2017 19:33

What a lovely moment for you and your DD. Xmas Smile YANBU at all (I’m a bit teary eyed reading this, tbh.)

OfaFrenchmind2 · 20/12/2017 19:35

So so lovely Smile
This is the kind of things that will make you smile for years to come!

Draylon · 20/12/2017 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SilverDoe · 20/12/2017 19:49

You've made me cry too. I'm genuinely so happy for you and your lovely DD, it's moments like those that which make all the hardships of parenting worth it :) Flowers

Messelina · 20/12/2017 19:50

That's beautiful! I remember being reduced to tears by my kids when they were small and did sweet things, and having to explain, 'Sometimes grown-ups cry when they're happy' which always astonished them Grin

BrownEyedPeanut · 20/12/2017 19:54

My eyes are watering!! So sweet!!!

wornoutboots · 20/12/2017 20:25

I did cry on Monday when my 5 year old who's now mostly caught up but 2 years ago could barely put 2 words together was the clearest, loudest, best-spoken child announcer in their Christmas show.

"our next song is about a donkey!"

Those who don't know us looked at me like I was insane.
My friends had tears in their own eyes.

ShimmerShineandMe · 20/12/2017 22:31

Well done to all the amazing achievements on this thread. They really do surprise you at times don't they? Grin

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