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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

About setting an alarm?

11 replies

44PumpLane · 19/12/2017 21:44

Fully prepared to be told IABU so please do be honest.

DH and I have just had a conversation...... we have to have our twins out for an appointment in the morning, DH typically gets up when he wakes up (self employed so no 9-5) and I get showered and ready when he comes downstairs (still on maternity leave so no urgency to be out the house at present).

I've just reminded DH of the babies appointment in the morning and reminded him to set himself an alarm.

DH thinks I should wake him up as I am already awake. He thinks the fact I want him to set his own alarm is indicative of the fact I don't work together as part of a team.

My point is if I need to get up for something I set an alarm, as does everyone else I know. I'll have been up with the babies from 6am and what if I don't realise the time and don't wake him? In order to make sure I don't miss waking him I would probably set myself an alarm, so why wouldn't he just set an alarm?!

Also he objected to having to set himself an alarm whilst being on his phone, so it wasn't like he had to go off and find his phone in order to set the alarm.

So AIBU to think that if you need to get up for something you should just set yourself an alarm?!?!

OP posts:

Magicmonster · 19/12/2017 22:04

This is craziness (on his part). Why is it your responsibility to get him up? There is absolutely no reason for him not to use his phone.

Pengggwn · 19/12/2017 22:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

positivity123 · 19/12/2017 22:10

He should set an alarm. HIBU. His idea that you are not working as a team is actually him not taking responsibility. He is the weak team member here.

hereitis · 19/12/2017 22:14

Why is he not up with them every other day?

mineofuselessinformation · 19/12/2017 22:17

If you sleep in the same room as him, just set an alarm - and don't turn it off or put it on snooze. It will soon wake him! Tell him you were busy with the babies if he gets arsey about it.
And keep doing it. There's no way you should be the only one who ever gets up with your children in the morning, is there?

Original poster

44PumpLane · 20/12/2017 06:36

Brilliant! Thank you for Tyne replies- I knew IWBU but sometimes it's good to just check!!

Pengggwn I get up with the kids through the week and hang out with them downstairs, when he gets up and ready he comes down and looks after the babies while I shower. I'm on maternity leave so no issues, when I go back to work next year he'll be doing the mornings and taking babies to nursery/childcare while I get off to work.

hereitis he doesn't get up with them every other day because I'm still on maternity leave and he's at work- he will be getting up with them when I'm back at work.

mineof he gets up with the kids when I ask him to, no issues there it literally is just this random phobia of his to set himself an alarm that is bugging me!

I like positivitys thinking that in fact he is the weakest link due to his inability to set himself an alarm! I feel particularly vindicated!

OP posts:

Original poster

44PumpLane · 20/12/2017 06:37

Too early. I knew IW Not BU!

OP posts:

UserEleventyBillion · 20/12/2017 06:48

YADNBU. I'd wake him up whenever I got up and just do an innocent expression, pointing out he said to wake him when he complains. If he wants the extra sleep he can take responsibility for it himself. You could easily not see the time dealing with the twins then end up running late or having to dash out the door with no time to shower.

HermionesRightHook · 20/12/2017 06:51

Get hold of his phone and set random alarms on it.

DH and I have separate alarms for the same time - apart from anything else it's a failsafe, what if there's an issue with one phone?

hereitis · 20/12/2017 07:00

Who’s up with them in the night? Hats off to you if you’re on ML and not in desperate need of some sleep!

Original poster

44PumpLane · 20/12/2017 07:18

hereitis I'm actually very fortunate that the babies have been decent sleepers since about 6 or 7 months. They either sleep through 7-6 or one of them wakes once.

I also have an amazing ability to fall asleep immediately once back in bed, so I get up, pad across the hall, replace dummy and am back asleep within about 30 seconds.

In the early days of little sleep my DH would do the late shift till 12/1/2am and then I'd take over the night feeds (3 hourly feeding) so that I could go to bed at 8 or 9 and get a decent chunk of undisturbed sleep.

I like users suggestion of waking him when I wake "just to be sure" I dont forget to wake him in time!

OP posts:

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