So, I've been friends with this person for around 12 years. We had children around the same time. We've been quite close in the last few years, I supported her through a significant relationship break up and also through a disastrous affair with a married man that went on for far longer than it should have and only served to cause misery for all concerned. Even when she was arguably in the wrong, I supported her and propped her up when needed. I'm her friend, not there to judge.
We used to go to the gym together (I left the gym due to financial stresses at the time), and she was also (and still is) in my book club and we would meet for coffee about once a month. We would text each other most days.
This was until a couple of months ago. I've been going through separation and it's been a really stressful and hard time. To give you the full picture, I met someone else and I think this is where the problem stems from. My marriage has been hanging by a thread for a number of years and I finally took the step to separate in summer. I was honest with my husband about having met someone else, perhaps that wasn't the right thing but I didn't want to have an affair on the side.
My friend was supportive at the time, but has since become very distant and quite bitchy on text, sometimes telling me she feels so sorry for my husband etc (she would only know him to say hello to, not very well). In the last couple of months she's stopped texting altogether unless I send her one, and then I get a very terse reply with no coversation or enquiry as to how I am. It was her birthday a few weeks ago and I got her a card and present as usual, and the morning of her birthday I was going to send her a Facebook message.
It was then that I realised she had de-friended me. I was quite upset at the time, was actually in tears. Quite a kick in the guts. I only have a few close friends, and would have included her that group.
I dropped the gift and card off with her nanny as she was working, and I got a one line message thanking me for the gift.
I've had nothing since.
Clearly she is upset about something, I simply don't know what apart from me leaving my husband, but she did the very same thing about 4 years ago and I supported her without judgement.
I haven't said anything to her about Facebook as I don't want to be petty, and I'm terrible with confrontation. It's eating away at me though, and really makes me feel awful about myself.
Am I blowing this out of proportion? Should I ignore it or straight out ask if there's a problem? Should I just distance myself and realise she's not a real friend or do I deserve this for leaving my husband for someone else (I know that's a pretty awful thing, but we have both been miserable for years and we are trying to amiably sort things out).