to not understand why people that don't like us keep buying presents for us?

[Bananamanfan]

DH has 2 aunts that are very rude to us whenever we see them in person, but still send Xmas & birthday presents for the DCs.
I think I must have committed an unacceptable social faux pas in the distant past to cause the dislike/rudeness; I didn't book them a taxi to get to our wedding ceremony (i assumed that they would just arrive at the time indicated). They actually ended up going in DH's wedding car and he arrived about 20 seconds before I did.

Other times PILs have invited us to family events (like DH's DGM's 90th birthday) and when we have arrived there haven't been seats for us (even though they knew we were coming) and we have had to go somewhere else nearby for lunch on our own (twice).
We haven't bothered with any family/social events for 2 or 3 years now, but they still send Xmas cards & presents for the DC. Why do they do this? I wish they would stop.

They want to be seen to be nice and generous (similarly invites to events)
It is also a passive aggressive test - if you forget to send a thank you card I bet they tell all and sundry how ungrateful you are!
I may also have a friend of the family that cannot stand the feeling is mutual who without fail sends birthday/Xmas gifts for my girls.

That's the thing pink the one year I didn't send a thank you card, my ILs reported that they wondered if we'd received the gifts as they hadn't heard anything. Maybe this year I won't send a thank you and ask ILs if they got the thank you card as I 'haven't heard anything.'

So they can inflict pointless tat on you.

They are British presumably?

Liking someone or not is no barrier to batshit gift giving surely? Nor is whether or not you’ve seen them in person 😂

Duty?

My parents buy presents for my in-laws every year, despite never being purchased one in return. They do it out of a sense of familial respect based on their Confucian upbringings.

We get gifts for dc’s every year from abou 6 different women that I’ve never met. They’re all friends of mil. It’s always something completely unsuitable - one year we got those little socks with bells on to help babies find their feet, ds was 4. It’s then a complete pita as we have to spend ages writing bloody thank you letters.

Yy to random presents from mil's friends.

We don't do thank you cards but still they continue. I couldn't pick these women out of a line-up.

My family decided to stop the pointless consumerism and end gifts for adults. Such a relief. Dh's family are still at it so every year I am given stuff I don't want or need or indeed keep.

Poor dh has to buy gifts for his side.

I wonder if the economy would collapse without Christmas gift giving.