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Original poster

DD and taking car to uni

116 replies

mostlikelyanunpopularviewpoint · 13/12/2017 03:16

After being disappointed with her A Level results, my middle DD has finally got her act together and has thankfully received offers from Manchester and Kent for after her gap year is over.

We are having a bit of a disagreement over her car.

DD wants to take it and potentially rent a parking space

I think she should leave it, she won't really need it at uni and can get the train home and drive it in the long holidays. I may then use the car myself during term time as I can't afford my own car- I will also then put some money towards her insurance

She has savings to pay for her car at uni

Who is being unreasonable? Or more sensible?

I think DD is just wasting her money!

OP posts:
AuntJane · 13/12/2017 12:40

It's not just the parking space - what about insurance? She'll need to change the address it's kept at, which could affect her premium.

But, at the end of the day, it's her call.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 13/12/2017 12:48

My DD is at Manchester. Didn't take her car for the first year: she was in halls right next to the uni with no parking.

She has lived further out in her second and third years. She parks her car on the street and uses it for; supermarket shops, gym, getting to jobs (works casually for a bar agency and does events all over the place), visiting distant boyfriends and coming home.

I have no idea about Kent but Manchester can be dodgy late at night for a girl on her own.

SilverySurfer · 13/12/2017 12:54

You don't need a car at the Uni.

Let me re-phrase that for you ' I don't (didn't) need a car at uni'. You have no idea if the OP's DD needs a car with her at uni or not.

LookingForwardToChristmas · 13/12/2017 12:58

It is her car and she is an adult leading her lift, so her decision.

I suspect you pushing the matter will just make her dig her heels in and take it regardless.

QuestionableMouse · 13/12/2017 12:58

I brought mine and I love having it here. Means if the buses are delayed for any reason I can still get in to lectures, I can shop at more places, I can pick up extra shifts at work if I want. You sound a bit selfish... If you were driving my car more than me, I'd expect you to pay for more than just your portion of the insurance!

Seniorcitizen1 · 13/12/2017 13:11

Manchester has an excellent public transport system and literally dozens of buses each hour pass the university on Oxford Road - I managed with a bike in the 70s - she wont need a car if she goes to Manchester but dont know about Kent

SendintheArdwolves · 13/12/2017 13:29

OP, can't she take the car for the first term and see how it goes? She doesn't have to decide right now for the full three years.

She may find that it's useful, or she may find it's a pain. But it's her car either way, so I don't think you should be pushing her one way or the other.

(FWIW, I went to uni in a big city, and one of my flatmates had a car and it was GREAT - we all chipped in money and would drive to a big supermarket to do a cheaper shop and buy in bulk, pick up second hand furniture when we needed to, drive all over the country to have fun and when it was time for everyone to be moving, she made a fair amount in tenners, bottles of wine and pizzas from grateful friends.)

Mummyoflittledragon · 13/12/2017 14:15

If you can’t afford a car for yourself, do you still intend to pay anything toward her car insurance? I would have thought not and save up for a car for you.

Mummyoflittledragon · 13/12/2017 14:16

Sendin

It wasn’t like that for me, I got taken for a ride so to speak when I had a car in my 1st year. I couldn’t afford to run it after that.

stickytoffeevodka · 13/12/2017 15:08

It's her car - if she can afford to take it to university with her, then I'm pretty sure it's nothing to do with you.

As for you "putting some money towards insurance" so you can drive it in term time - what about tax, MOT, service and any repairs that need doing? You can't drive it for most of the year and only pay towards her insurance costs!

Chrys2017 · 13/12/2017 15:14

potentially rent a parking space

She won't need a car at Uni. Many student housing developments are built without allocated parking, on the understanding that students will use the excellent (and subsidized) public transport facilities, or walk.

However the students in my city (with 2 universities) persist in bringing their cars and leave them parked for months on end without moving them on residential streets, making life very difficult for the permanent residents who can't park on their own streets! Just one of the reasons students are generally not welcomed into a residential community.

Flitter123 · 13/12/2017 15:19

If she's going to be in Canterbury it's absolutely horrific for parking.

HermioneWeasley · 13/12/2017 15:24

So you financial situation has changed since you bought her the car. She will b able to make do without one easily in either location. I think what you've proposed is fine. It’s mad that she has a car (which you bought) but you can’t afford one!

PUGaLUGS · 13/12/2017 15:25

It's her car, her decision.

Tara336 · 13/12/2017 15:25

Mine took her car and it was a god send for her, meant she could take part in sports off campus etc

PUGaLUGS · 13/12/2017 15:26

It's her car, her decision.

stickytoffeevodka · 13/12/2017 15:26

She won't need a car at Uni.

Surely that depends on a whole host of factors? Where you live, where you're at uni, whether you have a partner who drives, where they live/study, how often you go home, whether you have a job or not?

I don't get people saying "Well, I didn't need a car therefore nobody else does either"

harshbuttrue1980 · 13/12/2017 15:28

Yes, its her car. however, she is only able to run the car because you aren't charging her any rent. Therefore, I think its fair for her to share the car with you if you don't have one. If she won't share, then charge her rent and use that to buy a car for yourself. Madness that you don't have a car but your daughter who lives with you rent-free has one.

PaintingByNumbers · 13/12/2017 15:33

Maybe once she leaves you could rent a room out and it would pay for a car? Tbh I dont see how you can ask her to leave it for you to use, but I agree that manchester isnt the best place for a car either

Littlemissamy · 13/12/2017 15:37

I think if it’s her car then there’s no “letting her” argument. It’s her car. She’s an adult.i also disagree with PP who sat if you’re helping her financially at uni then she shouldn’t be allowed to take it. If you’re helping her financially, that should be unconditional. I used my car a lot at uni. It got me to work - much safer getting home since most of my work was pub evening shifts. It allowed me to go shopping without messing around with taxis. I ferried my mates around for petrol money, which pretty much paid for my fuel/parking costs.
It’s up to her. Her car, her choice.

frenchfancy · 13/12/2017 15:38

Yes, its her car. however, she is only able to run the car because you aren't charging her any rent. Therefore, I think its fair for her to share the car with you if you don't have one. If she won't share, then charge her rent and use that to buy a car for yourself. Madness that you don't have a car but your daughter who lives with you rent-free has one.
^This

SlothMama · 13/12/2017 15:49

I left my car at home for the first year as my halls didn't allow us to have our cars on campus. I had it for second and third year, made life easier to get to work and to go for food shops, trips etc. I could have lived without it but I liked having it.

If she's living on campus for the first year she probably won't need it tbh

NamedyChangedy · 13/12/2017 15:54

My quality of life would have been much much better if I'd had a car at uni. I did a lot of sport and it was a nightmare constantly asking for lifts from people who did have cars, or being stuck in the middle of nowhere waiting for a bus / coach / train. If she finds she can't afford it, she'll bring it back.

TheFairyCaravan · 13/12/2017 16:00

DS2 wasn’t allowed to take his car to uni. There was absolutely nowhere for him to have parked it where his halls were any how. The lecturers on his course said they might have been able to get him a permit for the hospital for when he was on placement but even that wasn’t a given. He left it at home and sold it after a term.

He and his friend bought a car together halfway through their second year and share it. Tbh, his house is within walking/cycling distance of uni and the main hospital so he cycles. He spent quite a bit on a decent bike. The only time he’s really needed his car is when he was on his community placement.

She probably won’t need it, tbh and it will at up funds that could be spent elsewhere.

hellsbells99 · 13/12/2017 16:02

Ignoring your reason for wanting her to leave the car and just looking at it from your DD's perspective, then I would recommend that she definitely does not take the car for the first term and then looks at the situation after that. If she goes to Manchester, then the buses run every few minutes and for most of the night.
I have two DDs in Northern cities who are now 2nd years. In the first year they didn't need a car at all. In the 2nd year, DD2 would like a car for shopping but would probably use it once a week. DD1 would use it a lot more but doesn't need one. So DD1 borrows the car occasionally to take for the weekend otherwise they have use of a car (shared) when they are home.

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