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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To object to someone with a cold sore kissing my baby?

60 replies

Fluffycoffeemachine · 12/12/2017 18:05

Ffs. A family member of mine who has a cold sore kissed my baby on the head. It was so quick I couldn't stop her! AiBu to think you just don't do That?

OP posts:
Chasingsquirrels · 12/12/2017 20:34

YADNBU.
I have coldsores and I don't miss anyone when I've got an outbreak, kids, partners, no one.

Original poster
Fluffycoffeemachine · 12/12/2017 20:38

I dont get coldsores but sure I've been exposed so hopefully I have some immunity. Bloody silly cow

OP posts:
Prusik · 12/12/2017 20:39

This (MN link) is how the herpes virus has impacted my ten (now eleven) month old. I would go nuclear at them and I really am a placid person

Original poster
Fluffycoffeemachine · 12/12/2017 20:42

Sorry pruisk I can't read that I'll have a panic attack seriously.

OP posts:
Tigertoes · 12/12/2017 20:44

For your reassurance, he is far from certain to contract the virus through a kiss on the head and, even in the unlikely case that he did, then he would not become ill tonight. It would develop over 2 days to 2 weeks. Look out for rash or blister on his face, lips or mouth, a high fever or just being floppy/off his food. If these things happen, A&E and tell them he has been exposed to HSV. These problems are very rare. But YADNBU. I would be beyond livid.

Standingcat · 12/12/2017 20:47

My DD was hospitalised for a week, had to be tube fed and was very poorly as a baby after coming into contact with a cold sore

Original poster
Fluffycoffeemachine · 12/12/2017 20:51

Omg this makes me feel sick seriously I'm furious. The thought of something happening to my baby makes me feel physically ill

OP posts:
Ansumpasty · 12/12/2017 20:51

Easier said than done but my guess is that he's very unlikely to get it from a kiss to the head. Perhaps call your GP tomorrow so that they can reassure you but nothing will happen tonight. Chances are he will be just fine, op.
Someone did this to mine, too, (I couldn't work out of it was a coldsore or a spot but I was freaking out and angry) but I forced myself to put it out my head and DS was just fine.

RestingGrinchFace · 12/12/2017 20:53

I would have stopped talking to them for a few months tbf. But I get super hormonal after childbirth.

Letseatgrandma · 12/12/2017 20:57

I would be very unhappy-cold sores can be extremely dangerous in some situations. A friend of mine got her first cold sore when she was pregnant and ended up losing her baby at 8 months pregnant Sad. Nasty things.

Gemini69 · 12/12/2017 20:59

I'd be bloody LIVID LIVID LIVID ...

did you Say anything to the FOOL Flowers

BrownBreadSliced · 12/12/2017 20:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bambamber · 12/12/2017 20:59

Some people genuinely are unaware of how dangerous the virus can be. I have a coldsore at the moment and was telling my husband that coldsores are why people often get angry about kissing babies on their lips. He genuinely didn't know it was that big a deal.

A lot of people also don't realise that you can get coldsores anywhere on your body, so even a kiss on the head is not a good idea. A couple of times a year I get clusters of coldsores somewhere on my upper body

JollyGiraffe · 12/12/2017 20:59

It might be a good idea to stop posting the horror stories now??

It sounds like the OP is extremely worried, and those posts are not helping Sad

OP, the likelihood is your DS will be absolutely fine. The vast majority of babies that come into contact with the virus will be absolutely fine. He would have to be very very unlucky for something awful to happen. And if he starts to get poorly, you will know that herpes is a risk and be able to get him seen and treated as soon as possible.

Please try not to worry (although I understand how hard that is) Flowers

georgie262 · 12/12/2017 21:00

As a sidenote, Not everyone who has the cold sore virus actually gets the symptom of a co,sore. So they will often think they are immune when actually they have it but don't get coldsores.
YANBU, However a kiss on the head is very unlikely to be harmful so please don't be too anxious.

Thedietstartsnow · 12/12/2017 21:00

I'd be fuming

JaneEyre70 · 12/12/2017 21:01

Have you got a number for the hospital/unit you were discharged from that you could contact tonight to put your mind at rest? Failing that I'd see your GP in the morning. But don't panic over it.
I'd also be reading the riot act to the idiot who goes round kissing babies when they have a coldsore..............

UterusUterusGhali · 12/12/2017 21:01

Does baby have any open wounds on their head? FSE marks or forcep cuts?

rcit · 12/12/2017 21:02

Op don't panic about the link. I've read it for you and pruisk's baby is ok.

Since you know that your baby was kissed by a complete and utter moron, you will be on the lookout. Any sign of anything, then go to hospital.

In a few weeks time, I'd write to this relative explaining what a risk they took. You don't want them going and kissing more newborns with cold sores. If relative takes no notice or is rude, you should cut them off imo.

Original poster
Fluffycoffeemachine · 12/12/2017 21:03

I didn't say anything as we were at a funeral ffs! I have anxiety anyway and with him being a bit early ive been worried about him.

OP posts:
MillennialFalcon · 12/12/2017 21:03

Hopefully your little one will be ok but I would be furious because it is a risk and has been in the media enough that people should be aware not to do it!

Original poster
Fluffycoffeemachine · 12/12/2017 21:04

So glad pruisk baby is ok xx
I might phone health visitor in the morning

OP posts:
MillennialFalcon · 12/12/2017 21:04

Meant to say hopefully will be OK as not near the lips, I completely understand why you are worried though.

littlecabbage · 12/12/2017 21:15

Try not to worry - kissing him on the head will not allow the virus to get into his body, unless he just happened to have an open cut where she kissed him. But you are right to be annoyed - I would be.

Wills · 12/12/2017 21:21

Whenever I've had a coldsore myself the worst bit has been not being able to kiss my children's heads. After the first birth the next three I always went in with a zovirax as part of my "birth kit" During my third I even demanded I be allowed to put it on, though for the life of me I can't be sure I had one emerging. So YOU ARE 100% not being unreasonable. I had a hissy fit when a close friend wanted to cuddle my new born 30secs after she'd stubbed out her cigarette outside!

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