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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if anyone has experience of antenatal depression?

49 replies

sureitsgrand · 10/12/2017 22:24

Thought there might be more trafffic here, please be nice, I'm a bit desperate.

I'm 33 weeks pregnant. Been fighting it and covering up and blaming bad days on something else for weeks now. I can't cope with anything, I'm off work, I'm finding it impossible to look after my toddler and I think my relationship is falling apart.

I'm going to the GP tomorrow. Can I take anything for this? Will it take a month to work? I can't go on for much longer.

OP posts:
SleepyHeadThisTime · 11/12/2017 09:12

Tbh the withdrawal isn't too bad - not nice but very short lived and the tablets make a world of difference. I breastfed and apparently the withdrawal is only noticeable after the birth because the baby is essentially main lining what you're taking through the umbilical cord. However I didn't know there would be withdrawal until it happened - my dr didn't tell me so Iyou will hopefully be in a better position to make an informed decision about what's best for you. You may find that once you see your gp you start to feel better whatever treatment they recommend - just being able to tell someone how you're feeling and knowing that you're being supported helps.

WhyamIBoredathome · 11/12/2017 09:24

Bless you. I have no experience of antenatal depression, as mine was way before children but by recognising how you are feeling and asking for help you are doing the best possible thing. I hope that your midwives are able to get you the support you need.

sureitsgrand · 11/12/2017 09:47

Ok. My dad has took my little boy for a walk so I can get dressed. I've got a gp appointment for 11.30. I've sent my partner the best article I could find on prenatel depeession. I sound like I'm being in control and pro active but it's only that I feel totaly desperate and scared so I need to do something. None of my friends have noticed as its usually me supporting other people. I am so scared that this is it that I will never feel normal again.

OP posts:
TheOtherGirl · 11/12/2017 10:08

Please, please don't worry that taking ADs while pregnant will do any harm to your baby.

I had PND after DD was born and was put on ADs, and I stayed on them all through my second pregnancy. DD2 has always been very healthy, was a competitive gymnast for 4 years and is now in the top 3% at her grammar school. So you can see my ADs didn't do her any disservice Smile

Hormonal depression is a hideous experience, so please get the help you need.

5amisnotmorning · 11/12/2017 10:25

Yes exactly as you describe. I only realised it after giving birth when I felt like a cloud had lifted. I wish I had reached out for help. Good luck today.

sureitsgrand · 11/12/2017 10:34

I hope to God it lifts when this next little one arrives. My Dad has just walked by the window with my little boy in the snow. He's jumping along beside him in his red wellies and winter coat and hat, he is the most lovely little boy.

Yet after 5 minutes with him I'm unable to cope. I constantly feel sorry for myself, feel like no one can see how awful things are in my life. But actually my life is fine, it's me. I can see it now. I just can't see how it will end?

The replies are helping, I know I'm not the only one. It's bloody horrible and I know it's not the real me.

OP posts:
GreenPurpleRed · 11/12/2017 10:39

I had it with dd2. It was terrible, but the moment she was born it lifted and I didn't suffer from pnd (which I think I did with dd1) and was worried about.

I did tell my hv and she said lots of people feel this way but wasn't much help Hmm

sureitsgrand · 11/12/2017 10:42

I supported a friend through it two years ago. Didn't think I'd end up with it. It's really snuck up on me.

OP posts:
cmax2005 · 11/12/2017 11:07

@sureitsgrand Not sure whereabouts in ireland you are but when I was pregnant I visited the mental health unit in Rotunda as I suffer from ongoing depression and they were so helpful and supportive during my pregnancy. If you are attending this hospital, or any other, they should all have mental health units that can help you out and you should be able to contact them directly or get details from your GP/midwife

DeltaG · 11/12/2017 11:12

Hi OP,

Don't despair, there most definitely is a way through this. I say this as someone who has been and is in the same position.

I'm 35 weeks pregnant and am just tapering off Sertraline for antenatal depression (AND). I had AND with my first pregnancy too (DS now 22 months), although it went undiagnosed until I presented later on with PND after a traumatic birth (assisted delivery, baby in NICU, haemorrage & blood transfusion for me).

For me, the depression is directly linked to Hyperemsis Gravidarum, which I have had until 7 months with both pregnancies. I nearly lost my job over it in first pregnancy and my contract was terminated after I recovered from my episode of PND (also treated with Sertraline). This didn't do much to help my confidence and mental health either, although with the treatment I was able to cope!

For this pregnancy, I realised as soon as the HG hit that the antenatal depression was going to strike again as one week in, I was considering terminating a much-planned pregnancy. Where I live in Switzerland, antenatal care is obstetrician-led and I brought it up with my doctor as soon as I started to feel low. I was put back on Sertraline at 6 weeks and have now just come off it.

So, all of this to say that you most certainly can overcome this. It's good that you have recognised it and are prepared to sort it out now, as antenatal depression is a big risk factor for PND.

Sertraline is safe to take in pregnancy and during BF and whilst ideally you would taper off before the birth, there is no problem in continuing for as long as you need. The baby's paediatrician will need to know, just so they can be followed, but in my case he and both my obstetrician and psychiatrist were all happy for me to continue the medication if I felt I needed to.

Realistically, there is not enough time for you to start the medicine, be treated and taper off it before the baby is born, so it's likely you'll be on it in the post-partum period too (It takes a few weeks to start working). But this is preferable to your current mental state and will safeguard you against developing PND. PND is no joke, neither for yourself, your baby, your partner nor your wider social & professional circle. If you can treat the AND now, it's more likely that you won't go on the develop PND.

If you have any further questions, feel free to ask and I will try to answer them. Oh and I'm a scientist myself (PhD chemistry), so I went down the pharmaceutical treatment route with my eyes wide open.

Good luck (and sorry for the essay!).

sureitsgrand · 11/12/2017 12:39

Thank you for the information. I am still waiting to be seen at the GP.

OP posts:
TheOtherGirl · 11/12/2017 17:38

I think it was sertraline that I took for PND too. It was amazing stuff and rescued me from a very, very dark place. I knew something was very, very wrong within 48 hours of DD being born as I felt like I was sinking deeper and deeper into a black hole while everyone around me was smiling and happy.

Some unfortunate women really cannot cope with the massive drop in hormones after birth, or conversely the very high level of hormones while pregnant.

DeltaG · 11/12/2017 19:16

How did it go at the GP, OP?

ElsaMars · 11/12/2017 19:32

I'm 34 weeks pregnant and at about 25 weeks I had to concede I needed help. I felt exactly as you describe.

This is no 2 and I hadn't felt like it last time. I spoke to Docs who put me on ADs and referred me to MH Team (though I'm still waiting for an appt!)

Everyone has been great and taken it very seriously as they worry about the higher risk of PND. Definitely speak to a professional.

justforthisnow · 11/12/2017 21:21

@sureitsgrand
How did today go? Any referral?

@cmax2005 I am sorry you went through this but you were lucky with the Rotunda as they do have that service. Nowhere outside Dublin does as far as I know.

sureitsgrand · 11/12/2017 21:33

Hi, I got on ok. Got a referal to the Dean clinic at St. Pats, as I have Vhi, doc said it would be quicker than local psychiatrist services. Still feel shit but a bit relieved too. Thanks for all the replies and for checking. I'm not great at tagging etc on mumsnet, but this thread is a help.

OP posts:
DeltaG · 11/12/2017 21:58

Ah that's good news! Hope you can be seen soon and on the road to recovery Smile

justforthisnow · 12/12/2017 21:27

That's a great service, make the most of it and hopefully it will help. Good luck and check in if it's helpful.

sureitsgrand · 12/12/2017 21:38

Thanks. I'm feeling worse again today if I'm honest. Not got an appointment as of yet. I'm in bed. If I get up I'm horrible to everyone so I'm better off here. But I feel like a total slob.

OP posts:
nousername123 · 16/12/2017 12:26

I honestly know exactly how you feel. I'm currently pregnant with my first and have been going through it quite badly but I promise that it will get better when you talk to someone. Write how you feel in a journal. When you feel really out of control, sit in a comfy seat, but your hands on your lap and take 5 deep breaths slowly, try to clear your mind a think of somewhere you like to go or have been where you were happy, then after a few minutes, take 5 deep breaths again slowly. Do this until you're calm. It works for me. I hope this helps x

villainousbroodmare · 16/12/2017 12:33

I was told the other day by my consultant that there is an established link between anaemia and PND. I imagine the same might be true of AND. So try to take your supplements. Thinking of you.

sureitsgrand · 17/12/2017 20:56

I do have slightly low iron. Will keep on the supplements. Still no appointment for psychiatrist. Went to a counseller who is supposed to specialise in this area, but she just said I'm trying to hard to control everything. Which I knew anyway. My husband has stepped up to the mark hugely the last few days and been very underunderstanding which has helped and we've done nice christmassy things both days this weekend. I still don't feel 'happy' or like myself but feel an improvement for having told people and spoken about it.

OP posts:
villainousbroodmare · 18/12/2017 11:30

Good for you. Keep in touch. Thinking of you x

FMBT2 · 08/12/2018 19:53

Hi there,
It's so difficult and not your fault. I am 31 weeks pregnant and feel similar to you.

I think its worth finding out which GP has an interest in mental health etc and seeing them. Try a few out until you feel listened to.

I have just decided to take anti depressants as it has been getting too difficult to function and I want to be well when the baby comes if possible. I have had them before not in preg and they have taken a week to work thats all.
Also check out this website, they have online support I think and a helpline
www.pandasfoundation.org.uk
Lots of love.
It will pass
x

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