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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Gutted I let my little boy down

42 replies

Wishfulmakeupping · 09/12/2017 20:56

Ds bday today we had to cancel party as Dh sick and couldn't have kids to coming to house full of germs- so postponed.
Tried to make it special on my own with dcs meal out, soft play etc but completely gutted that all my plans for his special day were let down:(
Feel quite ready about it- side note I'm
Completely done in and drained caring for dcs, sorted house, building presents, shopping, looking after Dh but I'm really a feeling like a shit mum I just wanted it to be a fun day but think he could feel I was stressed plus going to someone else's bday party tomo so that's puts it even more into focus today wasn't Good enough for him

OP posts:

BumWad · 09/12/2017 22:37

2 years old! He won’t have cared either way

littlemisscomper · 09/12/2017 22:38

OP, you are a great big 'nana Pants! This will go down in family history as the year your DS had TWO birthday treats - the being spoiled rotten by mum on his birthday, and the party he had the next weekend!

Grilledaubergines · 09/12/2017 22:39

Oh that is rubbish. Not sure why DH couldn't go elsewhere so party could go ahead though?

Oh come on! Be reasonable. Yes it’s hugely disappointing for OP and her son but it’s totally unreasonable to expect someone who’s ill to have to leave their home.

grannytomine · 09/12/2017 22:40

OP I am sorry it must have been disappointing but I read the heading as I let my little boy drown and felt sick. I hope you don't mind me saying it was a relief to find out it was about postponing a party.

I hope you do manage to have a lovely party with him and I really don't think you are a shit mum because you obviously care.

ohcecelia · 09/12/2017 22:41

Don't be so hard on yourself! He's two - parties are really only something that even need to happen when they're school age. My DD is two next week and we're not having a party, just presents cake and a day out.

KarmaStar · 09/12/2017 22:42

.uk bet he went to bed a happy little boy knowing everyone knew it was his birthday and his special day,he knew he was loved,he ate out,got presents,lots of attention and another party to look forward to.
Please don't beat yourself up over this.you did your best.
Relax and go look at his smiling sleeping little face.💜💜

tigerdriverII · 09/12/2017 22:43

He’s 2. He doesn’t know what a birthday is Let it go

WhirlwindHugs · 09/12/2017 22:45

I've had to do this before, it's really frustrating at the time - but try not to take it to heart. Maybe try again in January when you don't have to panic about squeezing a time people are available for before Christmas.

We ended up holding our child's party a month later than originally planned, it was fine, she was happy. Double birthday!

becotide · 09/12/2017 22:59

Ahhhshut up, he's fine. he won'tremember it

LBOCS2 · 10/12/2017 08:59

Honestly, he won't remember it and kids are really resilient. No one wants to get ill this close to Christmas and it's always easier to host a party when you have help, which you wouldn't have had if your DP was ill.

We had to cancel DD1's 5th Birthday party last weekend. She suddenly started vomiting spectacularly on Friday evening - and there was NO WAY I was going to be responsible for infecting the whole of reception with a winter vomiting bug! My heart broke for her, I felt awful having to explain that we weren't going to be having a party. But she was fine. She's looking forward to having one in January instead and all of her friends brought her presents to school so it really spun out the gifts!

Don't feel bad. You're doing the right thing.

NerrSnerr · 10/12/2017 09:11

He doesn’t care. At age 2 it’s a special day if he finds a good stick to play with.

Original poster

Wishfulmakeupping · 10/12/2017 09:25

😂 Nerr that genuinely made me chuckle

OP posts:

wetsnow · 10/12/2017 09:29

My DH was ill for my dds last birthday.. luckily party was after another venue but I had to do everything myself with a 3 month old as well and it was bloody hard.
Dh was sad he had missed it too.
Don't feel bad.. I'm sure he had a lovely day xx

DrRanjsRightEyebrow · 10/12/2017 09:29

don't give it another thought. I am doing a small birthday party for DS this year as he turns 4. Previous to this it didn't occur to me as he didn't get the concept or birthday parties. Any birthday for a 1 or 2 year old is for the parent's benefit, not the child. The child is just happy with happy parents (and cake) so don't dwell.

Sirzy · 10/12/2017 09:30

In the nicest possible way you need to stop putting so much pressure on yourself.

ZigZagandDustin · 10/12/2017 10:49

I was getting ready for my little ones 2nd b-day party yesterday too and kept giving her little cups of popcorn to keep her out of my hair. Every time she got a refill she shouted 'hurrah, my party', and went off alone and delighted with her 'party' to watch peppa. I genuinely think that would have been sufficient (no popcorn cap) as her party to make her happy!

Bubbinsmakesthree · 10/12/2017 11:43

He doesn’t care. At age 2 it’s a special day if he finds a good stick to play with

So true - in fact I find the more effort I put in to making something 'special' the less likely it is to really be special to my DS. Often it is the simplest things that delight

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