To hate the phrase, 'I'm sorry, but'

[Loonoonow]

I am normally relaxed about idioms but the phrase 'I'm sorry, but' followed by an opposing view to an earlier comment really annoys me and I have just read it in three threads in succession. It makes no sense - why would you be sorry for disagreeing with someone? The whole point of a forum is to debate and discuss so why on earth apologise for politely expressing a different opinion?

A very wise friend says that 'but' is shorthand for 'ignore everything else I've just said and start listening now' and that is particularly true when it is used online. Cast aside the 'I'm sorry' MNetters. State your opinions freely, be proud of your own ideas.

I'm sorry, but that's just how I feel.

YANBU I was cured of this when I used it in a particularly fractious business meeting. My opponent rubbished everything I said and finished his vicious attack with “and I accept your apology”

It's along the lines of, "I'm not racist, but," or "No offense, but." You can be sure your about to hear something racist or offensive.

Can I include "I'm going to play devil's advocate for a moment..."

And I'm adding "I'm not being funny, but..."

My personal pet hate is "I'm not being funny, but..."

Not really seen it on MN but hear it a lot in RL. Always right beore the speaker says something pretty rude, as if saying that first excuses it?

Xpost LavenderTrug

With all due respect.....

Totally agree with Op. Saw this a few minutes ago on a thread, it’s something I really dislike. So passive aggressive - you’re not sorry at all, so why say it!

No, I hate it. No need to apologise for disagreeing or stating an opinion. If you're about to say something you feel you need to apologise for in advance then maybe it shouldn't be said!

YANBU.

You can ignore all the fluff before but. It’s when people finally cut to the chase, that you find out what they really meant

This reminded me of a Game of Thrones quote!

Jon Snow: "What did father use to say? Everything before the word "but" is horse shit."

"Are you me, OP?"

For some irrational reason, that makes me want to punch the screen.

It's such a fucking stupid question

Oh I fucking hate the "are you me". It's fucking ridiculous!
And I absolutely hate the phrase "trotted out". It makes me think of some sort of wierd pig line up.

@ 'pig line up'

YANBU

I can stand any of those. ‘I’m sorry but...’

No you’re not.

Yeah, I loathe "I'm sorry but..." It's like that person is elevating their view, making out that I'm going to be really upset that they disagree with me when actually I probably couldn't give a rat's arse.