Me vs Costa...

[ImAMarshmellow]

Went to a shopping centre this morning with ds. Wanted to stop for a coffee mid morning so went into one of the 2 costas in the retail park.
Ds is intolerant to soya, dairy and eggs, which means he essentially can't have anything that Costa sell. (Bread contains soya, crumpets have eggs in and cakes are self explanatory. They also prepare stuff in the same area, so cross contamination is highly possible) I don't want him eating a bag of salt and vinegar crisps, so I normally take a bag of Ella's puffs snacks or similar. (He's 15 months).
Bought myself a coffee and cake and sat down with ds and his snack. He's happily chomping through his snack and an employee brought my drink over and asked if I had bought the snack ds was eating from there... I explained not and that he can't eat anything from there because as far as I am aware most of the foods are unsuitable for his dietary needs. She basically asked me to either leave or put the snacks away.
So was I wrong for bringing my own snacks or was I being reasonable since he really can't eat anything from there?
The only other 2 places to eat within that retail park would have been the same I.e they sell cakes/snack style foods.

[AnonEvent]

Even without the allergies, I would be shocked if a cafe/restaurant/coffee shop objected to a very small child eating very-small-child food there. I don't mean serve him a whole meal, but I often give DD (14 months) a square of Philadelphia sandwich in eating establishments, she is still on a low-salt diet (due to age, not illness) and I don't trust shop-bought sandwiches not to be brimming with the stuff (PFB).

[WeAllHaveWings]

YANBU to give him a small snack if there is nothing suitable. Did you buy him a drink (orange/water), I don't drink coffee so rarely go into Costa, but I thought they had a small selection of soft drinks?

[BluthsFrozenBananas]

curryforbreakfast I apologise for wording my post incorrectly, let me try again. I think the server, who was probably working to the rules they had been given from Costa, should have shown some discretion.

[thepatchworkcat]

I always took baby snacks to cafes and not because of allergies, it was just what I did! Always spent plenty of money on things for myself. Don’t think it was ever a problem so perhaps you just got (un)lucky with that staff member.

[happygirly1]

Think she's a jobsworth. Allergies or not, a lot of people would bring a snack and water for a 15 month old baby when going out and about.

They don't really sell food suitable for babies so unless you were willing to order him a smashing piece of lemon drizzle and a mochacchino, what were they expecting you to do?

[Happyhippy45]

I used to go with my adult daughter to Costa/Starbucks etc every week and she would bring her own food but buy a drink. She was on a strict meal plan (eating disorder) so there was good reason. No one EVER questioned her.

[SlothMama]

Sounds like you encountered a jobs worth, I can't see an issue with purchasing drinks and a snack and having something separate for your child who has allergies...

[overnightangel]

Your son is allergic to everything Costa makes, and you take him to .... Costa.
Then complain.
Wow

[Enwi]

We went into costa last week (me plus 3 toddlers, friend plus her 2 toddlers and a baby) and it was absolutely pouring down with rain. We were all soaked and as soon as we got inside on of my toddlers asked if they could open their lunch box now. I explained we couldn’t have our lunch boxes in Costa, but we would order some toast until we got home. The lady rushed over and said it was absolutely fine, the children could have their lunch boxes as long as we atleast bought something to secure the tables. Friend and I got hot chocolates, sandwiches and some Christmas cookies for the children so ended up spending quite a bit more than we would have done had we just bought everyone toast. I thought it was great customer service and very generous.
Sounds like the lady you got was a jobsworth- especially as you were buying things and your little one is so young.

[demhalluk]

Does that mean if you were breast-feeding you'd have been in trouble for bringing in a drink?!

[BluthsFrozenBananas]

While I absolutely think the op should have been allowed to give her son a snack, it’s unfair to brand the waitress as a jobsworth. She could well be, but she could also just be a young, minimum wage employee who happens to work in a coffee shop where people often bring i new outside food and has been told by her manager that they need to crack down on this.

[BexleyRae]

No one at my local Costa has ever batted an eyelid when I'm giving DD snacks that I've brought with me. Often they talk to her and ask if she is enjoying her snack

[Mamabear4180]

I had this last week in a different cafe. My 16 month old DD is just like your son with dairy and soya and the only thing on their menu she could safely eat was chips but I ordered a big breakfast for me and a meal for my other toddler and drinks for us all so had spent a reasonable amount. The waitress said she would ask the manager if it was ok for DD to eat her own lunchbox but she never actually came back to tell me. I would have fed her anyway though! I don't trust cafe food very often because there's often hidden things. DD can't have a lot of bits either-peppers, sweet potato, kiwi, mango, whole wheat..the list gets longer all the time. Found out she was allergic to flaxseed about a month ago. It's just too much to ask to see the ingredient list of every menu! Much easier and safer if she just has her own.

[IHaveBrilloHair]

Definitely staff member being a dick.
My close friend is the manager of our local Costa and would never do that, in fact during local events (bonfire night/Xmas light switch on), posts on the local FB groups to let everyone know they can use the toilets without buying anything, and goes out of her way to do as much as she can.

[IamPickleRick]

I go to Costa all the time and feed my 18mo homebought snacks. They don't provide anything suitable for small children imo so what are you supposed to do?! I'd have asked her what they do offer that meets his needs. I am on a low salt diet for health reasons and have often asked how much is in a certain thing. M&S are very good for this, they always get out their nutrition sheets and check for me with no fuss.

You were a paying customer, you'd already paid xxx for a cake and coffee!

[DiegoMadonna]

While asking somebody to put their toddler's snacks away or leave could result in one of two scenarios, I'm pretty sure almost every business in the world knows which one would occur 99.9% of the time.

a) customer apologises and puts the snacks away, then purchases food from the establishment instead, boosting the business's profits

b) customer says wtf and never goes back there again

I probably would have asked the employee to check with their manager.

[Mymycherrypie]

I wonder where the cut off is? A baby under 6 months obviously can't have anything except formula or breast milk and Costa can't provide that! 😂

[MyKidAreTakingMySanity]

They’ve probably had the situation in the past of groups of mums with toddlers turning up, buying a couple of coffees then laying out a spread of brought in snacks on the table.

This sounds plausible. My friend's parents owned a tiny cafe and they would have a group of mums regularly come in with toddlers and babies who all had their own snacks. They took up numerous tables, left complete and utter detestation (BLW apparently meant that any mess their precious little darlings made with the huge packed lunches they brought in, was to be cleaned up by the shop owners who weren't even making any money from them.) and they'd buy maybe 3 coffees between them all and they were in no rush to leave. It lost them money, both in running costs and wages, plus lost revenue from customers being turned away due to no tables. In the end they had to say something and it didn't go down well.

I understand the "no consuming food and drink not purchased here" policy, after all, it's not a public park bench, however, on this occasion I do think the Costa employee should have been understanding. Allergies mean the child couldn't eat there but mum was still a paying customer. That situation is the exception to the rule I think.

[Mamabear4180]

Your son is allergic to everything Costa makes, and you take him to .... Costa.
Then complain.
Wow

What do you suggest as an alternative? Or are you just being a dick?

[CotswoldStrife]

It's entirely standard practice for cafes to say that customers can't eat their own food there. Some are willing to make an exception for smaller children but some are not - it is not unreasonable for a cafe to want it's customers to eat and drink stuff from there, though!

In the circumstances that the OP describes, I'd have got a take-away coffee and cake tbh.

[ooodile]

I'd probably have asked the person at the till while I was paying for my own food if it would be ok for my child to eat her own snack because of her dietary needs. When asked nicely, and given forewarning, it's unlikely they'd have said no.

It's manners to ask beforehand so the Costa employee doesn't think you're being sneaky and trying to dodge buying something for your child.

[overnightangel]

I would suggest going somewhere other than Costa
Is that too obvious a reply?

[montenana]

I'd have asked her what they do offer that meets his needs

THIS.

or the British "smile and nod" and carry on.

If it kicked off i would ask for the manager and/or get everyone's name and get writing to HQ. Just think how many coffees you could get with the voucher you'd receive!

[Mamabear4180]

I would suggest going somewhere other than Costa
Is that too obvious a reply?

More ignorant than obvious. Where exactly, based on a dairy, egg and soya allergy? Where the OP can have a hot drink and her son can eat the food?

[Dahlietta]

I think a lot of places are like that (ie can’t eat anything not brought from them on the premises).

Not normally for babies though! Especially when they don't sell baby food. I've never had this issue in Costa or any other coffee shop. You were definitely unlucky!