Setting example for other people's children

[AvenuesAndAlleyways]

I was waiting at a pedestrian crossing on the school run with another mum - our daughters are in year 6 and she has a daughter in year 1. A man crossed the road before the lights changed and the other mum freaked out. She was yelling that he should wait til the lights went red and he was setting a terrible example for her 5 year old - what if she copied him? He looked at her with a WTF look and carried on.

After we crossed she said how awful the man was - I said maybe it wasn't the best thing to do but it's not up to others to set examples for our kids and children need to know even if someone else is doing something it doesn't mean it's right. She totally disagreed and insisted she was right.

She's not a friend, we just live near to each other and sometimes walk up together so I'm not bothered if she thinks I'm wrong but was she BU?

I saw a guy go on a total rant about this once. It was particularly amusing as he was not holding his kids' hands due to having a bottle of beer in one hand and a ciggie
In the other.

Chaos I'd never noticed that - thank you for telling me. I'd always assumed the dog went by the lights/beep.

Nah, don't avoid her avenues , you need to set an example to her children of how not to be a weirdo!

What everyone else said, plus

I think I might leave a bit earlier to avoid walking with her.

Pleeeeease don't do this, OP. This woman is already comedy gold!

and Chaos that's really funny about your 18 month old.

Cross post Clafoutis

I'd have loved to see her reaction if he'd told her to fuck off!

KeepServingTheDrinks and Clafoutis that made me snort-laugh! It's good to have a bit of perspective on it as it was quite embarrassing to be next to her when she went off on one.

Unfortunately I didn't see her this morning - she would have gone absolutely ballistic at the man who decided to cross the road with an ambulance blaring its sirens while everyone else waited. We had the proper British response of tutting and rolling our eyes

No I agree with her. I belive it's everyone's responsibility to set an example to children.
I always follow the traffic lights. I'd never forgive myself if I stepped out and a child did the same and got killed or suffered life changing injuries.
However that being said. If someone "shouted" at me. I'd probably give them a WTF face. I'm 42 I'm not 12.

given that both myself and my eldest daughter had very narrow misses when drivers have jumped red lights (so crossing on the green man) I prefer to teach kids to use some common sense - so why wait on an empty road for the green man - just cross - equally even on green check for bllody idiot drivers!

But awwwlook, there are LOADS of things that adults do on a daily basis which children shouldn't
Are you honestly say you will never ever drive, boil water, drink alcohol, use a knife etc in front of a child in case they do the same and injure themselves?

As someone said upthread, there are things adults do which children shouldn't. That includes judging when it's safe to cross the road without needing a traffic light to stop cars

Aww It’s absolutely not my responsibility to set a good example to other people’s children. That’s their parent’s job

No I agree with her. I belive it's everyone's responsibility to set an example to children

what when my idea of an example to set is not the same as yours?

She was BU. I tend to wait for a green man when there are children at a crossing (mostly since having my dd) but if I'm in a rush then I go when it's safe not when the lights tell me it should be safe.

Children also need to be taught to still look at the traffic not just there's a green man - there are still lots of idiots on the roads that just have to get through that set of lights!!

I don't expect everyone to set a good example.

Well surely the OPs friend won't mind when tell there kids off when running about like a tornado in a pub seeing as other people are now expected to parent other people's kids.

When other people's children do things mine aren't allowed to I hear 'Mummy that child is XYZ'. My DDs hear 'I'm not their mummy. Their mummy tells them what to do. I'm your mummy. I tell you what to do'.

So I'd say 'I'm not the man's mummy. I can't tell him what to do. But I can tell you to wait for the green man or you might get run over'.

I do find it annoying. I'm teaching my DC to wait for the green man and then they see people crossing on red...it means I have to work harder at explaining road safety. I don't shout at them though!

😂😂😂 this is hilarious! My DD is 2.5 YO and when she sees someone crossing without the green man she usually shouts really loudly "OH! NAUGHTY MAN/WOMAN!" Makes me chuckle every time

I was told this by my friend, "don't cross yet - it's red!" It was a loooooong road with nothing coming, nothing at all half a km or so. "You should set an example for children!", we were early-30s, had no children and there weren't any frickin children waiting at the lights

She has come out with other bollocks gems since. Smile and nod, smile and nod.

@YCAWS haha I so hope my 2yo turns out like your DD!!! That would be awesome

@YorkieDorkie makes me laugh no end but I think it's good as she knows what's she's meant to be doing and won't be lead by the crowd read as she's a bossy moo who won't be told

She sounds brill!