I am on a train. There is a man watching a golf tips video without headphones. What is reasonable as a response?

[SimultaneousEquation]

I’m being very British and occasionally giving him surprised looks. And huffing.

No, I could just sense those knees being a mile apart.

Ooh! Someone else has joined in. I think we have a history documentary on the Boer War going on! Can’t see if it’s meek-looking granny or young bloke further along.

Quietly (at the same volume of his video) narrate your journey to yourself

Can you say "If you don't use sone bloody headphones I'll shove a tee up yer arse!"
Ok, don't say that but with that mental image in your head just tap him on the shoulder and say in a staged whisper "visiting are we? Well you see, In Britain it's actually very rude to not use headphones in public."

Okay, he’s now switched off. Boer War and I have followed. Older lady has caught my eye

Ah, he’s getting off. Fun while it lasted. I shall now have some peace. Thank you for helping me not go mad

I love British passive aggressiveness. happy sigh

Good work OP!

Sad i'm late but my suggestion was to watch a video review of headphones.

well done OP

Thatstoast I’m now kind of sad he’s gone, that’d have been so apt

Shout "four" and lob a golf ball at his head

😂

I wish this ploy would work for me when I've tried it a couple of times. About 3 months ago I was in a coffee shop and the bloke on the next table started watching watching,without headphones,something on his laptop with a lot of shouting,cheering,applause and general rowdiness on it. I put up with it for 10 minutes,then thought 'sod it' and started watching a suitably noisy video on my tablet. Within about 1minute,several people at nearby tables started muttering and glaring at me! Then after about 5 minutes,one bloke actually called over to me 'Can you turn it down love? Or use headphones?' To which I responded 'Yes of course,but you may want to ask him as well' nodding towards the guy on the next table. To which he said 'Oh yes,I was going to'. Funny that he hadn't said anything to him before though. It was only when I committed the 'crime' that he acted!

I was on a train recently and there were a couple watching TV programmes without headphones so loudly that I (several seats away) could hear most of the dialogue. No-one did anything for a while and then I craned over my seat, and said (loudly but politely) "would you mind turning that down please" And the bloke said "of course, sorry", and he did and the rest of the journey passed in peace. I need to channel that firm and friendly approach in future.

Tell him that his golf addiction is driving a wedge between you. No idea what that means, its some sort of golf pun!

Hmm, I'm too late.

Inwasnon a train keast week, standing room only. I was stiod behind the seat of a man in his 50s (?) who spent the whole of my 75minute journey Mumsnetting, much to my delight and slight disturbance

Good God, i sound drunk! Sorry for typos!

I think the porn in public variant would have done the trick.

Why don't you watch a YouTube video about how to do your pelvic floors - loudly?

Was in hospital a few months back watching something quite sweaty on my iPad. Wasn't til I got up & walked around the bed I realised my earphones weren't plugged into it

Sweary not sweaty

thelastredwinegum I had terrible visions about what the sweaty vid could have been, so glad you clarified.

Toooldtobearsed
Did you ask if he wanted a pombear or dome naice ham to go with that?

Or even some cutted up pear?