to stress out about competing obligations?

[tinkertailorsoildersailor]

I work full time and have 2 young kids. Dp is a stay at home dad. At the moment I can never do what I want to do it seems, because of a continual stream of competing obligations. This week I have been invited out for a xmas meal and drinks on two separate nights - I can't do either because of work meetings and other obligations where I have to travel away on the train and won't get back in time / at all.

I want to spend more time doing xmas things with the kids like going to xmas markets but I'm always having to work / meet deadlines. My leisure invites and activities all seem to be when I can't get a babysitter or dp can't look after them.. I feel like I'm not in the right place at the right time, half the time!

I feel bored and frustrated? Anyone out there have their shit together and you life flows smoothly with a balance of fun and work? I'd like to hear from you!!! I'm in a grump!

I think this is inevitable when you have young children never mind the working full time unless you want to pay a babysitter.

My social life was pretty much on hold for years - and I think it's worse at this time of year because there are so many things on!

Simple solution - quit your job and ban DP from ever leaving the house.

More realistic - make sure you and DP have equal evenings out, and push back on work to protect your leisure time better.

"push back on work to protect your leisure time better"
I think this may be the key. Perhaps I should stop trying to be the 'ideal worker'..... and slack off a bit. Easier said than done though - as I have some responsibilities for managing others...

I’m not sure what line of work you are in OP but have you ‘costed’ you time, by this I mean calculate the hours it would take you to fulfill all your work requirements. I did this recently and it was a shock to my line manager - in paid for 21houra but costing out my job description is more like 30 hours - so negotiated what needs to give.

Most of the 'fun' Christmas work stuff is crappy....just saying. You're not going to look back on your fantastic night with Bov from accounts...

just to clarify - the nights out are not with work folk - with old friends and colleagues I don't normally see!

This is my busiest time of the year work-wise, and I always end up turning down invites out, either because i am too busy or too exhausted. Our christmas always seems to be thrown together in a last min fog of panic over the last few days, I am ok getting presents in advance but our tree rarely gets put up earlier than the 23rd Dec, and I am always dashing round the shops on Christmas Eve for last min things. I know exactly what you mean OP, there never seems to be enough time to actually enjoy doing Christmassy things