I just miss her so much

[willthisyeareverbeover]

Lost my little sister in June. She was 33. It wasn’t sudden, she’d been poorly for some time. I helped our Mum sort thorough her clothes last night and it’s finally hit me she’s gone, I work full time and have 4 dd’s, I have been keeping myself busy so i don’t have fl deal With it. I’ve never felt so down ever. Really don’t feel like myself anymore 😟

Oh OP, I am so terribly sorry for your loss. I wanted to post because I lost my younger sister 5 years ago when she was just 27. Horrific circumstances and I was holding her hand as she passed away. She was my best friend and I still miss her every single day.

I promise you this though, the day will come when you will think of her and smile instead of crying. You’ll be able to laugh at memories again and do/watch/listen to things that remind you of her without feeling like your heart is breaking. I know it seems impossible right now but one day it will be better. It will always hurt, but it will be a pain you can live with, a fraction easier day by day.

My deepest deepest sympathies OP. X

So sorry to all of you who’ve lost too. Some days I do smile at the happy times. I was there when she died. I think I may need counselling.
Is it wrong I feel better when I’m at work or is that just masking the problem?

So sorry for your loss. Sorting through clothe's, personal things is so hard isn't it? From one complete stranger to another, I feel a little of your pain.

When I lost a family member someone said to me the first year is the hardest as it will always be the first XXXX without that person.

Losing someone so young must be incredibly difficult and I'm so sorry you are going through this.

There isn't much more I can say. I've got no advice as people deal with grief differently

Thanks everyone for you comments,
It’s nice to know I’m not mad.
Her Dh started seeing somebody new after 6 weeks, this has made me very angry, especially since he stopped the contact with my nephew (not his biological dad but they were close). When she was alive he was great but I’m starting to think he thrived from all the attention. He hasn’t paid for
Her funeral yet ffs. Had the money but bought a new car instead. It’s like he’s totally forgotten her already. I never expected nor wanted him to be on his own forever but 6 weeks is just a piss take as far as I’m concerned.
Dreading Xmas, the first one without her.
Plus she always wrapped my presets lol!

My (late) Father also started seeing someone, 6 weeks after my DM died, I was furious, a lot of people thought I was being unreasonable,including his sister (my now "late") aunt, if it had been a year down the line, I would have been OK with that.No its not awful to be at work, or anywhere else for that matter and suddenly realise you havent thought about her for a little while.You need to be strong for her son, he will need you, who is he living with if not his step-dad?

So sorry for your loss

I’m so sorry OP. I think arranging some counselling would be really beneficial for you. It’s not a magic wand but I think it will help you to talk about your feelings

My little sister is 33 and I'd be heartbroken if I lost her so my heart goes out to you op xx

6 weeks! That is dreadful op.

My nephew lives with his bio dad who does a great job along with his paternal nan and grandad. When my sister was alive he was the model step dad, always had lots of love and time for him. Now nothing. My nephew has counselling through school and spends a lot of time with our side of the family too.
He’s an only child so loves coming to my mad house to see his 4 cousins. He seems to be coping so well but I see how other people who know him, eg parents of his friends look at him with such sadness and that makes me sad. A 10 year old with no Mum is just not fair. He was my sisters whole world and her miracle baby. I won’t ever let him forget how much she loved him.

He was my sisters whole world and her miracle baby. I won’t ever let him forget how much she loved him

That's lovely op, you'll be doing a great service to your sister

THats beautiful op. He’s lucky to have you guys 😪

33 is so young, and a sister. If I lost my sister I'm not sure how I'd cope. Grief over the loss of someone is horrendous. I hope this doesn't sound silly but there are stages to grief. My sister in law died in 2012, and for a few months afterwards I lived with my brother, niece and nephew. I spent a lot of time with my niece, she's 20 now. She had bereavement counselling. It helped a lot, apparently it's very easy to get stuck at the depression stage of grief. People think that the loss of someone is something you gradually get over naturally but I'm not sure I believe that. It takes time and love and support and someone to talk to. I really recommend you get some bereavement counselling, if you can x

And no, it's not wrong to feel better at work. That's a good thing. It's your brain's way of giving you a break from the sadness.