Friend and santa??

[Hardyloveit]

So a friend is taking her child to Disney Paris at Christmas! Fab' (honestly not jealous at all - we are off on holiday for Xmas and have done Disney this year)
What my Aibu is :
She got a santa to give her child this surprise and has told the child santa has done this all for her - fine.

I asked her not to mention it in front of my child at school because I didn't want my child thinking santa sends kids off to Disney etc.

She proceeded to do just this in front of a lot of kids - all 5-6 years of age and my child has then said how come child A gets to go to Disney from santa but her n her friends don't. My child is quite advanced and I explained that child a's parents have helped with this n santa has given her the surprise of going but not the actual gift if that makes sense and santa will drop off presents to child a like all the other children that night whereever they may be.

before I explained this to my. Chikd she piped up but she's SOOOOO naughty I thought naughty children didn't get anything etc etc etc
(Child a is extremely naughty but that's mainly due to poor parenting - no disapline - for example she wanted a certain bar of chocolate at the Xmas fair n didn't pick the correct ticket out of tombola so mum emptied the tickets on table and found correct one! NO LIE!!!)

Sorry getting back to aibu - about her telling all the kids santa has got this for child a rather than herself? And then when I asked her not to say that she did it anyway??

Sorry for rambling' !!! Just want to know if Iabu or not??

The parent sounds insufferable! Just do as much damage control with your own child and leave her to it.

Every family does 'Santa' differently. Yabu to dictate how other people decide to do it. Even if your child hadn't heard it from her they would have heard about it from the child.

They can tell her the present is from Santa... Everyone gets different gifts. You are overthinking this because you disapprove of the parents more generally

You are overthinking something and nothing.

It's entirely up to you how you do Santa, just as it's up to them. I am sure it is within your ken to come up with an answer to your child's question about presents being given differently in other people's families. In fact it seems that you already have. Job done.

Honestly.

Pretty unpleasant to have "Santa" give nothing to "naughty children" IMO.

And to label other children so.

It was the fact myself and a few other mums had asked her not to say it in front of the others and she then went and did it anyway. If her child had told the children that's fine and I would have said the same but it's the fact she purposely did it after we had asked her not to

The mum announced it to the other kids? That's weird

She sounds exhausting

And Why on earth was she allowed to search through the tombola tickets?

And she's clearly not that bright as it would have been much easier to just swap the tickets on the chocolates

Let it go

It's only flipping 'Santa' or whatever. Stop micromanaging people

Anti that's if it happened!

Everyone does it differently. We don’t do the ‘naughty kids don’t get anything’ because I wanted my dc to be aware that some people have no money and therefore get nothing at Christmas - and I didn’t want them to think it was because they were naughty.

It was a bit weird she told the kids rather than letting her kid do it though.

She did do it? Why would I lie about something like that? I don't think u could make that up! I was sat opposite selling some crafty things and saw it happen! Everyone was too shocked to say anything ! Plus the child was screaming quite loudly!

That's fair enough about the naughty bit - thinks it's because of the list and films etc but that's a good point about others that don't get anything will remember that next time she mentions the naughty list etc.

And if she told the other children about it after discussing it and you asked her not to, so what? It's a bit irritating but surely your day is made up of plenty of stuff like this (AKA people not doing things the way you want them to)? Mine is but that's life not to mention there is no actual harm done.

Because she did it on purpose in a not nice way!
If a friend asked me not to say something in front the other kids id respect that! It wasn't just one that asked her not to do it, a few did!

Hardly, it was a shitty thing to do.* Wether she was maliciously trying to show off or just excited to share that they were going to Disneyland, I don't know.*
Some posters are just hardwired to belittle OPs, take no notice.**

Bold fail! I apologise.

I do get that OP - the point I and others were trying to make is that a) it isn't actually that big a deal and b) you can't control what others' do (even when they've said otherwise). You cannot stage manage life.

In this instance, nothing bad has befallen you or your children. You could actually choose not to let this get to you. I'm not saying you have to love the woman for doing it, but you really do have the option of shrugging it off.

When things like this happen to me (and they do and quite often) I will be irritated but try and let it go quickly. Stuff like this is ultimately petty and not worth the headspace.