To interfere or not - DH and family

[woolythoughts]

DH is due to be going on holiday with his sister this weekend – just a few days break. I can’t go for work reasons and he had a week off from work so off he goes. Sister has a property there so no additional cost. Sister is heading off on Thursday and DH is due to join them on Saturday for five days.

His sister is notoriously unreliable. Think along the lines of you call her and she’s in the middle of dishing up dinner and says she’ll call back. It can be days before she remembers. Its just the way she is.

They also like winding each other up.

So, DH has booked plane ticket and is just waiting on his sister to give him the address of the place she has the property. To be fair he has asked her and texted her a few times and she hasn’t done it. There are two possibilities. One, she just genuinely keeps forgetting. The other is that she knows DH is a control freak and that leaving it until the last minute to tell him will wind him up as he can’t dot every I and cross every t until she tells him.

DH has gotten himself into a right state and is banging on about if she doesn’t tell him where the place is before he gets on the plane on Saturday he’s not going and he’s never speaking to her again.

I’m of the view that he should text her/call he one last time knowing what she’s like. He’s of the view he’s asked her several times and texted her so why should he beg. To be honest, I can see a genuine situation where sister has just forgotten and goes about blithely thinking she’s done it when she hasn’t.

We live several hundred miles from them so popping around isn’t an option. I’m tempted to text her myself and remind her OR contact his BIL on FB and prompt him. The problem is, if it gets back to DH I interfered he’ll never forgive me. Especially since I have invited a couple of girlfriends over Saturday night for a girlie night and having him around will spoil the atmosphere so I do have an ulterior motive for desperately wanting him to go.

WIBU to text his sister asking her never to breathe a word to DH ….. or should I just leave it.

If you contacting anyone is going to cause ructions between Dh and yourself then I would leave it. Your Dh has made contact several times. He can either choose to contact bil himself or hope that his sister finally replies. Do they have a landline he can call them on so there's the possibility of bil answering and giving him the info, or giving his sister a nudge.

Leave it. If your SIL enjoys winding up your DH she is likely to accidentally-on-purpose let it slip to him that you interfered.

It is rude of her imo. If she's going herself tomorrow it must surely jog her memory that she needs to let your DH know the address. She MUST have seen the countless texts / missed calls etc?

As much as it will put a dampener on your evening with friends if he doesn't go, I think he has a right to be pissed off with her, because it does sound like she's doing it on purpose to wind him up. He shouldn't have to keep chasing and begging her and I wouldn't want to go either if she couldn't find all of 30 seconds to text me an address so I could arrange transport to the property from the airport.

Let him deal with his own DSIS

I hate people who never say how things end up regardless of how minor

BIL texted tonight with the address which confirms my theory she was winding him up by leaving it until the last minute.

Girl date is back on

She sounds horrible. Why would she deliberately put her brother through that stress? I can't imagine people who aren't particularly anxious being happy to get on a plane without an address, let alone someone who likes to plan.