Every year DMIL asks us to go to the pub for lunch on Xmas day but I always decline the offer. I just feel like I want my children to play all day, we do dinner for when we're hungry and it works out ALOT cheaper than booking somewhere. As children we stayed at home and enjoyed the whole day and I want that for my children. I've offered every year to have them over for lunch but she says "she's done the staying in and she wants a pub lunch" then moans to the sister in law I'm being unreasonable by saying no. When me and DP got together and I was telling her I don't go out she said she agreed because she never did with her kids but now we've got our kids it's not right and we should go to the meal with them (bare in mind the place she wants to go is a really classy place where the kids would be expected to sit still and not take any of their toys with them) I've offered them to stay over the night before to be there when kids wake up, breakfast, even supper, I've always said we'd go out Boxing Day but none of it is good enough for how she wants it. She said now they'll just have to fit in a quick visit between spending the morning with her other son (who are going out for lunch with them too) and their meal time. I feel bad on DP because I feel like he'd love to spend more time with the family but he does say he agrees about the kids having the day to enjoy their presents. Aibu saying no to lunch even though I do offer alternatives and try and bend over backwards at any other time?c