To think that the world is becoming a less friendly place. If you have a genuine friend, you should treasure them.

[Rolf38]

To quote the wisdom of a dear grandparent that has always lived with me - 'No matter who your are, no matter how much you have, if you reach 80 with five true friends than you've done very well indeed'

Sometimes I think these days that this is too generous, and that if you simply have one friend who truly and genuinely cares about you should treasure them. The world can be such a lonely and self-fulfilling place these days that many just don't have time for others.

You tend to learn who your true friends are when you hit hard times. You may have loads of fairweather friends who are around you when you are doing well, however, when the 's* hits the fan' so to speak you can often count your true friends on one hand, if that.

I must say, I am so grateful that when I hit hard times earlier this year, I had a friend who actually drove to meet me. Many others just ignored, were busy or simply offered platitude, not advice. I could count the number of genuine friends who wanted to meet on one hand. I am just posting this as I feel so honoured and humbled that I do have a friend who would drive to see me and genuinely cares about me.

My grandad was right - true friends in this world are increasingly hard to come by, and if you do come accross one, treasure them and appreciate how lucky you are. I certainly do.

I think good friends are hard to come by. But I dont think thats a reflectipn on the world.

My best friend is like my sister. Her sister is also a good friend. Me and my best friend would do anything for eachother. She had a shit time earlier this year and drove and picked her up and brought her to stay. She calls me if her dh is being a dick (generally lovely guy but does some daft shit) I have done loads for her. I have just seperated from my dh and wouldnt have got through it without her. Me and exdh are in the same house. The nights he has the kids, i go to hers and she is always there for me. Me her and her sister spend time together and they are really lovely women who always remind me who I am and always lift me up.

Honestly, with 2 kids, a full time job and my own family to spend time with, i could not maintain that level of friendship with 5 people.

If i had 5 good friends i couldnt be there for them completely. And be there for my kids and my family. I woild certainly never have a romantic relationship, because i woild have time.

I have a large circle of friends. A night out has lots of people attending, have people to chat to, people to laugh with. I cant support them all like i do my best friend. But they all have their person who is there with that support.

I have a group of girlfriends and I can honestly say I’d be lost without them.

2 from school (20 years ago, I’m 36)
6 locally (friendships developed over last 5 years. School mums)
3 dotted around the country (picked up from when I worked (sahm now) and NCT over last 10 years.

True friends. Share, laugh, support. Absolutely no judgement whatsoever.

I went through a divorce recently and their support and love was unwavering. They mean the world to me.

I'm not someone who needs friends, however I do have one friend from (secondary) school that I'm very close with. Sometimes we drift apart and don't spend much time together but if either of us need anything we're there. That suits me fine. Oh I have my SIL too who I love, but not as close.

On the far side of 50, I have seen some amazing testimonies of friendship. But I have also learnt to be grateful for the lesser acts of friendship and kindness. These may not transform a life forever or result in lifelong devotion but they still make a difference at the time if we allow ourselves to notice them. The kindness of a stranger on the bus when you're struggling, the friendliness of a colleague who reaches out in support when you're having a hard time, the helpfulness of a doctor or teacher or neighbour who goes the extra mile because they want you to get help, the pleasure of knowing that somebody who may not have thought of us for years is thinking of us today.

If we divide the world into "true" friends and "fairweather" friends, we risk depriving ourselves of an awful lot of friendliness. We also risk being ungrateful.