To worry about the future sustainability of Santa?

[1DAD2KIDS]

I'm not sure if I'm the only one who fears for the future of Santa's operation. It just seems to me that it must be getting harder for him. I mean he isn't getting any younger. The price of raindeer food rocketing. The global population is spiralling upwards. Anti discrimination laws adding the cost of making all his work facilities acessable to people above heights of 3ft. Improved home security systems. It just seems more and more things are weighted against him?

Also I do wonder if there is anything that could be done to help? Maybe an online ordering system rather than him having to visit all the world's shopping centres and gardening centres to take the orders and waste time with small talk with the little people? Or maybe outsource some of the delivery to private firms. Hermes is reasonable would could they be trusted to do the job? And maybe he could take advantage of some of the new emerging low pay labour makets like Vietnam and outsource production? Although I do recognise he may come to blows with the Unions which in its self will cause operational problems for a bit. Especially if the elves and raindeer unions unite in solidarity over the outsourcing of services.

Never mind Santa retiring.
Does no one think of the aging reindeer. Work for a couple of carrots. Have to carry him, the sleigh, the presents and all that running for lift off. For a couple of carrots at best. And at worse glittery reindeer food

Yeah fekko chucks the guy that you’re thinking of! He could roundhouse anyone’s ass.

Anyone remember Spitting Image?

What with global warming I think he may need to invest in a new wardrobe and an artificial take off and landing strip before the current one melts. Any suggestions for more warm weather attire?

Notsooriginalwerther Well there's another concern you've raised. The growing cost of heating. But lets not forget Vladimir Putin has control of the only gas pipeline into the North Pole. Escalating tensions could she Santa's gas supply used a pawn in an ongoing battle with the West. After all the Russian's don't care they have Babushka to met their needs. His reliance on Russian gas supplies is a serious vulnerability.

Theresnonamesleft luckily The Animal Liberation Front don't have an artic circle branch

Unless he’s in cahoots with the Russians? I mean the rising gas bill could be a red herring in the bigger scheme of a man that visits every house hold in one night and knows who is being naughty and nice... I’m sure Mr.Putin would pay a great deal of money to know what Santa knows...? Welcome to Conspiracy theories 101.

This might fit the bill singasong

SylviaTietjens Has Satna been working out these days? Must be something to do with his new bit on the side.

Notsooriginalwerther that wouldnt suprise me. Putin is a smart and devious adversary. I know he has been aiming fake news and propoganda at the small community ethnic Russians in the North Pole to stir up discontent and resentment anmongst ethic russian elves. Givin him the option to inspire a Moscow backed pro Russia uprising if he fails to get control of Santa's operation by other means. And an uprising would no doubt trigger an invasion by Russian forces "protecting the ethnic Russian elve's right to self determination". Poor Santa probably hasn't got any choice but to give in the Moscow's demands?

The stress of climate change, Putin and Brexit has put him right off the mince pies and eggnog 1dad. He’s been living off carrots and the weight has fallen off. He’s also got rid of the beard as the elves were taking the piss and calling him a hipster.

SylviaTietjens was that the beard or the that he has take to drinking craft beer out of jam jars?

I thought he’d brought NORAD in to help with the planning - y’know, using their satellite tracking systems for weather fronts so that he can use the winds & curvature of the earth to cut down on fuel, build speeds etc?

And didn’t Rudolph have a GPS fitted into his nose for that purpose?

But yyy on the data issues. He must really be worried about storage. I mean, imagine the cost - and that’s without all the updates, in-house training, security etc. And it’s only going to get worse! I mean, even if he only keeps a daily tally for each child that’s 364 x 1,250 for my daughter’s school alone. Not to mention the data gathering and algorithms to work out if a day was ‘naughty’ or ‘nice’.

I can see a real need for outsourcing.

And then on top of it all he has to deal with all the Freedom of Information requests - how many elves are working for him, how much was spent on reindeer food, what type of paper he uses to wrap. I know Mrs Claus runs the office, but he still has to check.

And let's not forget the subject access requests from the naughty ones various people. Takes an age to sort and the admin fee barely covers it.

Definitely time he retired...due to cognition issues he has forgotten our house for years!

Not to mention the glaucoma...don't know whether dvla have been informed..

But unless he has a private pension he'll be working until a hundred and two.

Wonder have the elves sorted out power of attorney??

arrrrghhwinehelpswithteens the NORAD thing worries me. The Amercians have not got the best reputation where it comes to friendly fire. What if they mistake the presence of the sleigh popping up from the North Pole as an ICBM launch from a submarine of the Russian North Fleet? It could be the start of WW3.

EduCated don't forget the cost of the whole appeals process for those that contest the naughty list.

nightshade I did hear that in the event of Santa being out of action or retirement that a different celebrity would do it every year, like how they change the celebrity host on ever episode of Have I got News For You.

Bloody zero contract hours! !

To me he’s Father Christmas and he’s got an amazon prime account

nightshade it's a nightmare. The elves union are being totally obstructive to introduction of zero hours contract, change in pension condition, a 5% increase in the cost of the hot drinks vending machine and an end to free carpark passes.

Wonder is he entitled to a mobility pass for easy parking??!!

I can make 200 bags of environmentally sustainable Reindeer food for £6.00.

HoneyDragon Imports from China cost £3.82 for 300, plus a free New Year calendar of orders over 1000. I don't Santa is worried about sustainability at that price. Although that's still 51p more than last year.

I always wonder about the reindeer. So you have countries with the strict laws when it comes to imports of animals and quarantine but Rudolph and the rest of the gang can prance around Britain, Australia etc. without the border control ever stepping in.

Clandestino your right they are a serious hazard. We'll know who to blame if we all come down with reindeer-flu come boxing day.