Aibu to be irritated by this ?

[laketaupo]

Friend of many many years came round to see newborn DS today , and when informed that the milk in the bottle was formula rather than breastmilk , proclaimer that I really should be breastfeeding as breastmilk is best for baby.
For clarification I have toddler DS who was FF from 5 weeks onwards due to contact with his father and is thriving as per his peers (expressed milk initially ) , my dm is seriously ill with cancer and I need to be able to drop and run at a moments notice etc, she is a trainee doctor so should accept that I know my limits with these things and I also have another child so do have experience.

Aibu to tell her that I have enough on without being tied to a baby on the sofa permanently breastfeeding and expressing?!

I didn't breastfeed. I didn't want to. Just tell her.

I had someone at an NCT local coffee morning try and force my nipple into my sons mouth whilst I was desperately trying to cool down a hot bottle of water for his feed how? were you naked?

As a friend of many years she should be a lot more sensitive to and supportive of your situation.

Don’t store it up and simmer, be direct. Say “look, you know how I’ll Mum is, I need to be able to run at a moment’s notice and to not be tied to bf. It’s a sensitive subject for me, so can you leave it, please?”

I had similar from a friend as I gave formula top ups - I said very clearly that this was not a subject for discussion. Unfortunately our friendship has never really recovered properly, but I still think it was the right response - ultimately none of her business.

Should've told her to fuck off. No reasons, no justifications for your choices. Just a 'fuck off'

Ywbu to engage with her further.
Although, if she's a doctor maybe she does need telling

YANBU. I have a 9 week old, I breastfed for 2 days, it was horrible, painful and emotionally draining. If I have anymore babies I will be going straight for formula. That’s my choice, as to FF is yours too, as is to breastfeed for those who choose to. Absolutely hate the whole breast is best brigade. Breast is great but what’s not great is a Mum who’s wearing herself out emotionally and physically just so she can say she breast fed, fed is best. You do you and pay no attention to this friend.

Yanbu she sounds like a right dick, I'd tell her to fuck off in those exact words.

Completely your choice. Friend is an idiot. I would ditch her. Judgemental people are draining.
Hope you are ok and manage not to waste too much energy on this

See I didn't have this with mine. I ff ds2. Medication dictated it- great excuse, cause I didn't bloody wanna bf this go round having been ds1s entire everything- food machine, dummy, sleep soother (all boob) for over a year.
Only person to say anything was mw when I was in labour. I gave her a gentle bollocking and suggested firmly she read my notes. My diagnosis and medication list was right there- prescription to start the day ds was born.
I'd have loved someone tell me I was doing wrong my ff. I'd have happily lost my shit and told them where they could take their unwanted opinions

YANBU - you don’t have tell anyone your reasons for not breastfeeding or try and justify it with your Mum’s illness.

I didn’t breastfeed because I didn’t want to. I tried it for 3 days with my first and it was horrible. I’m physical capable etc no supply
Issues etc I just did not want too.

I’ve been called everything under the sun by certain people and I care not one bit.

“Yes but the great advantage with FF is that I can add a couple of spoonfuls of sugar to the bottle”.

And watch her head spin.

Thanks vipers , will tell her in no uncertain terms next time if she dares try again.

I'm a massive breastfeeding advocate and I think a lot more needs to be done on support for new mothers, however, YANBU - it is ultimately your choice on how to feed your baby and you do not need to justify yourself to anyone. Your friend was really rude!!

for you - it's tough enough having a new baby let alone dealing with your mums illness - be kind to yourself!!

"Best for baby!" Oh please fed is best and a happy baby is a full up one no matter if it's breast milk or formula! Tell her to piss off. Congratulations on your new baby!

I think the phrase 'Oh Do Fuck Odd Dear' is perfect in this situation!
Don't hold back - tell her to fuck off!

She needs a telling. My childless SIL was horrified when she found out that DS wasn't breastfed. He was five months old and it was the first time she'd bothered to clap eyes on him. I said "The day he was born he was transferred to a hospital forty miles away from the one I was in and my nipples didn't stretch that far!" Worked like a charm.