My father in law has promised my son a new bike and I am furious

[frances5]

My son is five years old and is not developmentally ready to ride a bike, but my father in law considers it a major issue. He told my son that he would buy him a new bike when he could ride his present bike without stablisers. He has insulted and bullied my son about the fact he can't ride a bike without stablisers. I really couldn't care a flying f$@K that his cousins learnt to ride a bike at four.

My son had a go and was in floods of tears because he couldnt ride the bike however much he tried. I felt really sorry for him being put under so much pressure to learn to ride his bike by grand dad.

His present bike is too small and I feel tempted buy him a new or second hand bike anyway. My husband feels this would be spoiling my son.

It's easier for them to learn to ride a bike which is a bit small - and anyway 5 is in no way late to learn - tell him he will learn to ride when he's ready and that his old bike is fine to learn on

its imperative that he gains confidence on a bike that is suitable. My ds only learned to ride last summer just befor ehe was 10! His g/p bought him a bike several years ago despite him not being interested/co-ordinated enough to learn. Obviously that went to a good cause brand new. We bought him a new one last year when he said he was ready to learn. He picked it up in a day.

Go by what your ds wants to do not what his g/f wants.

And ignore the bossy FIL - don't let him get to you!

has he got a scooter .. if he doesn't get him one .. its far easier to master and it helps them appreciate what a centre of balance is and how to find it .. which is crucial when he is finally ready to ride a bike.. you have to let them whizz around on it for months though

He has a scooter that he whizzes around on.

I resent my FIL bullying my son over something as trivel as learning to ride bike.

5 years seems very young to be learning to ride a bike without stabilisers, but if it's any help I was once told that the easiest way to teach a child balance on a bike is to remove the pedals so that the child can go sitting on the seat and learning the balance points, but it's safer because they can put their feet down if they start to topple. Ideal if his current bike id a little on the small side! I'm so sorry that your lo is feeling pressured, but if he wants to try for himself the pedals off might be a good compromise? (I've no idea whether it works or not, though, as my ds is too young for a bike yet, apologies in advance if it's a rubbish idea, but it made sense to me when I heard it)

likeabike have no pedals and if you took the pedals off his existing bike, as monkeybar suggests, it would have the same effect.

Children will learn to ride a bike in their own time as with learning to walk and talk and you shouldn't let fil get to you. Sorry your ds was so unset but I'm only just going to buy dd1 a bike for her 4th birthday and yes I'll have stablisers fitted.
Am I wrong in thinking that stablisers come off when the child is able to ride without them touching the floor?

I am 36 and cannot ride a bike. Has never been more than an idle, fleeting irritation. I never felt I was missing anything. And now I'm rather proud of the fact in some ways, makes me feel that I'm rather unique.

Having said all that I never had stabilisers as a child and never felt confident and thus never learnt to ride. So if you and FIL do want your child to learn, then YES you should use stablilisers in my (limited) opinion as long as they are required.