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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Son - mentally ill, sleep deprived or on drugs?

120 replies

ShatteredRose · 20/11/2017 06:44

Been having lots of problems with my 16 year old son. He hasn't done anything since leaving school and has been out every night smoking dope with his mates. I don't give him money anymore so I don't know where he's getting money from. He disappears for two days at a time lately saying he's staying at his mates.

This morning he got in at 4am (after been "at his mates" for two days.) I found him sat on the dining room floor in pitch black darkness staring out of the window. He said there were 3 men in "gigalo suits" hiding in the bushes watching him with cameras. He insisted on showing me where they were and couldn't understand why I couldn't see them. I've made him go to bed. I'm at a loss of what to do. Is he mentally ill or taking something other than weed? What can I do when I can't physically stop him leaving the house??

OP posts:
Sensimilla · 20/11/2017 08:14

*ONE=IME

Tiredemma · 20/11/2017 08:15

I am a MH Nurse- sounds very much like a drug induced psychosis.

raisinsarenottheonlyfruit · 20/11/2017 08:15

bad not bae!

Sensimilla · 20/11/2017 08:15

I thought I was Bob Dylan for an entire night on acid, once

SilverSpot · 20/11/2017 08:19

Doubt it is LSD. Not very easy to get hold of TBH.

My guess would be Spice or one of the other canaboid synthetics. Spice is bad news - its impacts are more akin to crack/heroin than to cannabis.

LeiasGoldBikini · 20/11/2017 08:20

I had experiences like this at 16 and I wasn't taking any drugs, I was expediting psychosis and was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Would he go see a doctor with you?

Lovemusic33 · 20/11/2017 08:21

My dss expereance a psychotic episode after smoking weed, he then had a complete breakdown, he's now diagnosed with schizophrenia and has been in and out of hospitals/units for years, he has been sectioned twice. You need to get your ds help, he needs to be seen by the mental health team. Weed/pot is totally different than it used to be, much stronger.

I work in mental health and we are seeing this more and more Sad.

RubaDubMum89 · 20/11/2017 08:24

He's on some form of 'upper' - coke, speed, Es, MDMA, Mcat etc. Psychosis usually results from a combination of the drug and prolonged periods of no sleep - uppers generally prevent you from sleeping/eating.

Speaking as an ex-addict for many many years (been through psychosis ALOT), get him help now. Don't give him a choice in it. Before this spirals out of control.

From my experience, psychosis doesn't generally occur after one or two times taking something, it follows a period of prolonged abuse. Although, this was just my experience others may be different.

I took speed/mdma/es/coke daily for a couple of years before I started to get psychosis.

I'm so sorry your sons going through this OP. I'd think that what started as recreational drug use has gotten out of hand. He won't think he has a problem - few people rarely do. But, he does. Good luck.

avocadobrie · 20/11/2017 08:27

From my experiences many years ago, I think that it sounds like he has taken quite a lot of an upper of some sort (cocaine, speed or ecstasy) which is preventing him from sleeping.

If he has been awake constantly for several days he will experience some paranoia simply from going for so long without sleep.

The best thing for him to do is get some good sleep. Can you buy him some sleeping tablets (the chemical ones)?

wellbanana · 20/11/2017 08:28

This sounds really stressful for you all.

I think like some others have said, it's a misnomer to be trying to figure out what drugs he may or may not have been taking. His experiences might be related to drugs or they might not. That will all come out in time. We don't know as much as we would like about the link between skunk and psychosis, but these two things very often go together (not saying skunk use causes psychosis as we just don't know).

What is more important is the distress he's feeling now due to what sound like scary and vivid visual hallucinations and 'paranoia'. They might resolve if they are caused by an acute factor like drugs, or they might carry on regardless of what is causing them. In which case they may well be labelled psychosis.

I would also question if the lack of school achievement could be the early indicators of psychosis too (as people can be at risk for a while and become more isolated, start dropping out of things, etc, before they have the more well known experiences linked to psychosis, like voices and other hallucinations).

If this is psychosis, then the research is that the quicker he gets help, the better the outcomes. There are mental health teams (called Early Intervention services) dedicated to helping people in exactly that sort of situation. If you Google your local mental health trust, you can call them and get put through to your local EI team for advice. They will be able to guide you as to what the best next steps might be for your son and your local resources available.

Please don't leave it though and think oh it's just drugs, it'll all resolve itself. It might be a blip and he's fine today, but even if that is the case, he's still at an increased risk of developing psychosis with all the experiences you're describing x

BackInTheRoom · 20/11/2017 08:28

@ShatteredRose

I'd ring the Crisis Team because how do you know he's not a danger to himself or others?

I'm betting he won't go to the GP because why would he? He likes his drugs, they mask and cover up his unhappiness about his life and his predicament so why would he actively stop this supply of 'feel good'.

I live with my DS who has MH issues (no drug taking) and it is exhausting and takes over your life so I'd go big guns and nip this shit in the bud. Get the experts in no wishy washy sticking plaster stroke of the forehead nonsense. 💐

stealtheatingtunnocks · 20/11/2017 08:28

Tiredemma and other MH professionals:

What should we do if our kids are tripping off their nut and it's drug induced? Is that a MH emergency, or should we keep them at home and wait for it to wear off?

stealtheatingtunnocks · 20/11/2017 08:30

Ah, thanks, PP, got it.

Noting for "just in case" - currently my kids are beautifully compliant, but, I'm not counting anyone's chickens.

OP, hope you're able to stay home with him, or get back home early.

greenberet · 20/11/2017 08:41

I haven't read full thread but your title caught me Op - I feel for you - currently going through my own battles with Ds and this could easily be me on here - Flowers

lalliella · 20/11/2017 09:48

So sorry to hear this OP, we went through many years of this with my DB. It could be cannabis, that can cause paranoia. If he is susceptible he needs help, at his age his brain is still growing and can be permanently altered by cannabis. It’s rare, but it happens. Sit him down when he’s lucid and talk to him, not with a reprimanding stance but from the point of view of trying to help him. He needs to be honest with you. It needs tackling before you have the years of hell we had with my DB. There’s so much more help available these days. And just a thought, he could be selling sex to get the money. This happened with another family member of ours. Sorry OP

LakieLady · 20/11/2017 10:02

What should we do if our kids are tripping off their nut and it's drug induced? Is that a MH emergency, or should we keep them at home and wait for it to wear off?

Not an MH professional, but I took acid most weekends for several years in my teens/early 20s.

I'd say wait for it to wear off. They'll need a long sleep, and maybe be a bit spaced out, weepy or moody for a day or two afterwards.

Coastalcommand · 20/11/2017 10:05

Could you speak to the friends' parents and see if together you can do anything?

reetgood · 20/11/2017 10:05

This happened for a guy I was doing a project with. he was early twenties and none of us knew him well enough/ knew about mental health to see he was not just being a ‘bit odd’. His psychosis escalated somewhat and he did end up being sectioned. In his case it was pressure, plus hallucogens, plus disrupted sleep with an underlying issue that triggered the behaviour. I don’t think it matters what the drugs are tbh.

I would speak to the crisis team I think. I feel bad that with the guy I knew we rationalised it, and thought he would get better once project was less intense/ cake down etc. He didn’t and I do wonder if he could have avoided a distressing and dramatic situation (sectioned after police involvement) had someone taken action earlier. He was probably very scared and having someone else acknowledge that things didn’t seem right could have been helpful, before his condition escalated.

Just to note that he did recover, although he had to change a few things (moved back home, changed jobs). It did have an impact and mean he had to take care of himself in a way that people in their early twenties tend not to. But he was able to do that.

reetgood · 20/11/2017 10:07

Came down not cake down!

hooochycoo · 20/11/2017 10:13

Talk to some professionals, rather than listen to the well meaning advice on here.

And don't necessarily panic. I was smoking weed, taking e, speed and acid at 16, but it didn't cause me any harm other than some come downs and one bad trip. I'd actually even controversially say I'm glad of the experience and that it taught me a lot.

Obviously that's not true for everyone, and there are lots of reasons for an individusl to be vulnerable to the negatives of drug use. That's obviously something to take very seriously and educate yourself and your son about.

You'd be best to educate yourself about the positives and negatives with an open mind, or risk alienating him.

Good luck! I'm not looking forward to my kids being teenagers and having to deal with this kinda stuff. Must feel terrifying!

Juicyfruitloop · 20/11/2017 10:58

There is a legal high, looks like weed but not sure if it smells that causes all sorts of hallucinations. Its called spice or mamba, It definitely sounds like drugs anyway. I watched a programme on this. Have a google on it then lock him up if it is, it destroys lives very quickly.

Roomba · 20/11/2017 12:33

My friend smoked a lot of weed and at 16/17 he developed psychosis as a result. There was also a family history of schizophrenia (which often develops at this age in young men too). Because of this the weed smoking wasn't seen as the primary cause by some doctors, some said it was definitely the weed and others a bit of both. There wasn't as much knowledge about how weed can cause psychosis back in the early 90s. In all cases he was advised to stop smoking it though but he wouldn't as he was psychologically addicted.

He was in and out of hospital for a long time, and many years later is doing okay. He wouldn't touch weed now as he's fine unless he gets tempted again.

I would do anything you can to get your DS help - 'force' him to the GP, take time off work, whatever is needed. My friend's parents emigrated without him just as he began to become ill and their lack of daily support made everything a million times worse.

TheWhyteRoseShallRiseAgain · 20/11/2017 13:52

How is he op? Flowers

Sensimilla · 20/11/2017 17:30

How is he now? Been thinking about you

ZombieVampireHedgehog · 20/11/2017 17:36

Any news OP, hope things have improved.

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