To feel I've ruined DHs birthday?

[TinyLittleFeet]

Dh turned 25 today. We had planned to spend the day together as a family (we have DD who's 2) at a local pottery place then were going for a meal at DHs favourite restaurant this evening with MIL, DHs best friend and another of DHs work colleagues (he works with his BF) who lives with his BF tonight. Tomorrow we'd promised to go see Santa with DD then go see the Christmas Lights and do a bit of shopping.

But this morning I woke up with excruciating ear pain, stood up and was sick. DH insisted on my mum taking me to the walk in centre (DH doesn't drive, I do but he was worried about me driving so asked my mum to take me). Was up there most of the morning to be told I have a bad ear infection, now on antibiotics and I need to rest.

Told DH to ring MIL and go to the meal without me but he didn't want to, saying he'd rather look after me. He's kept DD entertained all day and kept me topped up with cups of tea and painkillers, kept DD away from our bedroom (we're in a flat) so I could sleep and ignored the "no cats on the bed" rule so DCat could snuggle against me.

I feel awful that I've ruined his birthday. Lying in bed still in pain, trying to decide how to make it up to DH when I'm better. He was really looking forward to some time together with me and DD as usually one of us is working on Saturday, so I feel even more awful.

AIBU to think I've ruined his birthday? And if so how can I make it up to DH when I'm better?

I mean really, this is normal decent behaviour, right? What's the alternative?

"I woke up with excruciating ear pain, stood up and was sick. DH insisted on continuing with our plans so we went to the pottery place. So many spinning plates... I threw up 17 more times. DH told me to stop being melodramatic".

Shit happens and things don't always go to plan, that's life which it sounds like he knows. I'd probably feel a bit guilty too but seriously don't worry about it.

Sorry you're so unwell. So glad your DH is lovely and looking after you. I'm sure you will have a celebration when you're feeling better.

If it had been him who was ill on your special day, would you blame him for ruining your birthday?

Of course not! You didn't do anything stupid or malicious - you were just unlucky (NOBODY wants earache - it's agony!). You can all have a celebration together when you are feeling better - I hope that that's soon.

Ah I'm sure it'll be fine, adult birthday celebrations don't always have to happen on the day, DH has to work his birthday this year so we went for lunch the next day, it was just as good and we still got to spoil him.

As an aside, your DH sounds like a good guy, and your MIL must be pretty cool too, to be invited along to a meal with his mates.

Of course you haven't ruined his birthday! Hope you feel better soon.

On another note, isn't it far too early for a visit to santa?!

Oh, and I hope you feel better soon. After your little 'un is in bed, send the birthday boy to the shop for wine and cake.

A similar thing happened this summer with my birthday - we were due to go on holiday, DH felt unwell so went to the walk in centre in the morning in case he needed antibiotics, so he could take them while we were away. He was admitted to hospital with pneumonia there and then, and like you, felt guilty about ruining my birthday and our holiday. It wasn't his fault, he couldn't help being ill and I was more worried about him than the holiday, that's what insurance is for.

Hope you feel better soon.

You’ve not ruined it at all, you can’t help being ill!

Sounds like he’s doing a great job in looking after you too.

Could your mil babysit tonight so he can go out with his mate?

Not your fault in the slightest! Better to just do the plans again when you're feeling better rather than struggle on. Hope you feel better soon

Aww, @TinyLittleFeet, I hope you are feeling a little better Sweet, ear ache is awful.
Sounds like you've got a good one there !

Thought I'd update this morning. Still in agony.

DHs BF and other work colleague came over for the evening once DD was in bed, my usually teetotal husband was absolutely hammered. The friends live close enough to get themselves home which is a good job because DH was sick all over the bathroom floor, twice tried to get into DDs bdroom who thankfully sleeps through anything as he wanted a cuddle off her, then got into our bed where he thankfully stayed all night bar getting up to be sick again.

He's very apologetic, has bought me breakfast in bed this morning and was talking about the florists so I'll probably get flowers later.

I'm not too upset he never ever drinks normally and I ruined his birthday first with my ear infection.

Sounds like the guy is human after all!
Get well soon.