As a little background, my DP likes to go down the pub. He likes to pop in after work, or go down to watch the footie or spend a weekend afternoon/evening there. And he likes to do this a good few times a week.
I object to this cos it always means he drinks beer, (and he ALWAYS acts like a bit of a prat when he's had even one which often leads to argusments), it means that he spends less time with the children, it often means I get home (I work p-t while kids at school so rush to school, rush to work, work like crazy, rush to school, rush back home) and do loads of stuff round the house, then do dinner, bath, story, bed etc, and he just comes in , eats, watches TV and goes to bed. I also think its unfair cos I don't have the opportunity to do this sort of thing cos my "job" involves looking after my children!
Anyway, cos it causes arguements I quite frequently suspect that he's been down the pub but lies to me about it when he gets home.
On Friday, I drove the kids and their friends round to the chippy to get dinner. The chippy is opposite the pub, and DP's car was there. He came straight out and I gave it a bit of the moody stuff, but didn't cause a fuss. Then yesterday, I tried to ring him at about 6.15 to see what he fancied for dinner...no answer so left v/mail. Then got in car to go and pick son up from friends. Drove past pub, DP's car there again When I got home I asked why he hadn't answered his phone, gave him a hug and said he smelt of smoke (he's recently given up smoking, apparently!) He came out with some crap about how he'd been working with a couple of smokers. I said "Blimey, were you cuddling them? Normally working alongside a smoker out of doors doesn't make your clothes stick like that!" He said he had no idea why, etc. I then gave hime a coupleo f other subtle opportunites to fess-up but he didn't. In the end I told him I'd seen his car and asked why he had lied to me, how many other times he's lied to me and how I was meant to know if I could trust him in the future, etc, etc. He then somehow turned it round on me and said I was out of order checking up on him (all I did was drive past!) how it "would be different if we were married" cos then I'd have more of a right to check up on him and how he couldn't believe that he had to ask my permission, etc.
Now, I didn't cause a fuss when I first raised it cos I just wanted a sensible discussion about how it all makes me feel. But he has made the whole thing explode and is being grumpy with me! Was I really out of order? I know it's not nice being checked up on, but it's not nice being lied to either.....