Do you freak out when one of your DC injures themselves?

[MrsOverTheRoad]

DD aged 9 was having a sneaky last jump on the trampoline in the fading light this evening (we're in Oz) and DH was gardening.

DD did a last somersault and managed to knee herself in the mouth, splitting her lip....there was quite a bit of blood and DH ran in with her and he was shouting "I told you! I told you to be careful! It was dark! You were meant to be inside!"

He was panicking...I've done it too in the past but seem to have got a handle on it lately.

I made sure DD"s teeth were intact and got her a cold cloth etc and she calmed down and DH apologised to her for yelling...explaining that he was in a state of panic due to concern.

Do you freak or are you calm? My Mum once shouted at me for knocking myself out bless her!

I saved a little girl from choking once. She’d actually passed out and her lips were turning blue. I was so calm and then when all was resolved I was a hysterical mess.

Deathly calm at all times bizarrely. Even did CPR on a stranger then afterwards thought "did that just really happen?"

I’m fully capable of getting into a massive emotional flap about doing my taxes or anything like that, but for crises and injuries I go weirdly calm too. Until it’s over.

Lots of the flappers here are men. Is that because someone has to remain calm and it falls to women? Or are women used to dealing with blood.

My Dad gets fainty at blood and DH flaps somewhat. He was good when I had a difficult birth though.

I'm really calm and always have been even as a child, out playing with my sister and she fell and cut her head blood everywhere and we were on our own in the park.
Carried out CPR on a stranger without panicking.
Had lots of practise with my youngest who was extremely reckless / unlucky (has ADHD) so if I panicked every time something happened to him I would be in a state all the time.

Bummy

Your sil is making it all about her isn’t she how annoying. And how frightening for her kids

DH does this - almost blames the person who has hurt themselves because he gets a fright and panics! I slipped down the stairs when I was pregnant and he just looked at me and shouted 'why did you do that??!!' As though I flung myself bodily down the stairs as a matter of choice.... 😒.

I think is a reaction to panic / fright and some people are better at dealing with it than others. I don't panic - even in quite serious situations so I find it hard to understand why some people freak out. I always think 'how is that helping anything'

Er, I freak out.

But I'm like that.

I was just talking about this with my boss! I stay calm, husband does exactly what yours did op! My poor kids are more traumatised by the shouting than the injury bless them.

Calm and practical here. My kids have had a couple of injuries needing stitches, I’ve been there putting pressure on the wounds until we can get them seen to. Flapping and panicking doesn’t help and the need to help them takes over completely so I do what I think is most useful to them.

I panicked when DS (now 6) was a baby and had a seizure as it was so scary. Friend who is a Dr took us to hospital and really helped me. Broken arm and sprained arms I’ve stayed calm, I don’t know if it’s helped that DS has been older too so can communicate with me.

No I don't panic. Not sure if it's nature or nurture (violent childhood plus nurse training).

In addition both siblings had lots of accidents (not related to the violence) my dd has been diagnosed with hms and looking back I suspect my siblings probably have milder cases.

Dd has had lots of accidents which we now know are likely due to the hms. But she's not yet broken bones but again that's probably the hms because she's more likely to dislocate/sprain/pull a muscle which she's done on numerous occasions. I've always stayed calm with kinda of eyeroll reaction so it seems mundane/nothing to worry about to her.

The most frightened I've been was last year when an infection which people without hms can treat otc, basically shrug off, landed her in hospital severely dehydrated, having lost loads of weight and on drips and looking so so ill, didn't show it to her but I shed a lot of tears and was worried sick. Even after we got home it took several weeks until she seemed to be getting back to her old self.

Ex was a panicker, that annoyed me as its not useful at all. I used to just look at him and order him to calm down which seemed to work.

Main time I felt real panic for myself was my car accident, partly because "OMG what if dd had been in the car" but also my legs went numb and I was scared I'd damaged my spine, which I had but it wasn't as bad as I feared.

I panic on the inside but am relatively calm outwardly. My worst was when 7 yo ds pulled a huge tree branch onto himself in the woods, breaking his leg and collarbone. It was semi dark, February, raining, just me, ds, dd and our large bouncy puppy. No car nearby. Dg away at a stag do. I don't think ny blood pressure went down for about 3 days after that. The nurse at hospital commebted in how calm I was. Nope. Just good at hiding the panic!

@Whatsoccuringlovely it’s sad and scary to see how her little girl is changing in to a paranoid wreck.

I go super-casual almost to the point of denial.

I'm very calm, it's not in my nature to panic. DCs haven't had many accidents that needed anything more than a plaster - DS did once need stitches, but I didn't freak out because I could see it wasn't any more serious than that.

DH and I are both good in a crisis.
No shouting
No flapping
No crying
No fainting
No posting for attention all over Facebook.

It doesn’t help your kids if you are screaming and panicking. They need you to be an adult and get them treatment and comfort.

I’m not good with people who panic or flap. Tbh I wouldn’t have married DH if he was that sort of person.

No, am very calm but I have a nursing background. Just as well as I've had to deal with quite a few accidents and emergencies. Difficult to pick the scariest but it was probably when DS woke me in the middle of the night unable to breathe or talk with blue lips (croup attack). Panicking in that situation could have meant a very different outcome. Kids usually take their cue from their parents so it really is important to stay calm if you can.

DS1s School called and told me to meet them at A&E, thankfully my dad had raced to get him (I don’t drive) and I met them there. There was blood everywhere and his head was wrapped in bandages which were literally dripping with blood. I slapped on a smile and gave him a cuddle and pretended everything was fine while fighting the rising panic in case I scared him.
He’d been banged into a brick wall and split his head and when they took the bandages off it was awful (deep and wide scalp wound = shitloads of blood) I’m so glad he wasn’t looking at my face! He got it glued shut and was brilliant. It wasn’t until all the kids were in bed that night and DP got home that I dissolved.

Hmmm I used to be calmer and say the usually mummy thing "uh oh your ok, up you get".
Then DD2 had a fall and I ran over as she was trying to get up and I seen her arm bend in a really unnatural way 🤢. Then I panicked. And ever since she broke her arm I have a panic in case they broke something. I try to remain calm on the inside but I don't think I'm good at it.

Another calm here. We all know it doesn't help to panic and makes matters worse for the sufferer and any medics. However it's not a virtue - it's how you're built.

I’m calm at the time and then fall apart afterwards. It’s so important that the dc don’t see you panic.

I'm calm at the minute but the worst I've had is bumps, scrapes and a badly bitten lip. No idea how I will be if they do something worse!

I don’t panic. I’m remarkably practical in the face of injury. Dh flaps a bit but follows instruction.

My instant, automatic reaction is to shout at the dc. My actions are practical and considered but it sounds like I'm telling the injured dc off as I sound really cross and angry. It's my reaction to anxiety/worry I suppose.

The most recent time was about a year ago when Ds2 face planted some concrete and had a bump the size of an egg that was also pissing out with blood and covered in dirt - it was actually not that bad in the end but at the time with the mud and blood all over his forehead and matted in his hair, he looked like half his head was caved in.

Anyway I walked him to the bathroom and started washing it to assess the damage and at the same time was going 'DS WHAT ON EARTH HAVE YOU DONE TO YOURSELF, YOU KNOW THAT SIDE PATH IS SLIPPERY' and so on. I didn't realise quite how it seemed until ds's cries escalated and he started saying 'i'm sorry mum, I didn't mean to...'

I freak out immediately. Even if one says they don’t feel well or have a pain somewhere. Absolute panic.

And it’s not healthy or normal for me to be that way either.