Weird washing up behaviour!

[ShimmerAndShite]

My OH refuses to use our dishwasher. I think in the 6 months we've had it he has put a couple of pieces of cutlery in and taken something out that he needs that's in there when it hasn't been emptied yet. Sometimes though he will wash the stuff up instead of putting it in the dishwasher which then means I need to dry it and put it away as I got rid of our dish drainer when we got the dishwasher. It also means that we run out of stuff that we need as it takes longer to fill before it can be put on so I then need to wash stuff up before meals for example.

This morning though I have noticed that he has washed up a load of stuff that could go in the dishwasher (apart from the stuff that he left in the cold dirty water that I then had to fish out) BUT left the stuff that needs to be washed by hand like the wooden chopping boards.

Please tell me I'm not on my own in finding this weird and annoying?!

oops xpost with your update OP

That's a good point actually, I've grown up in a house with a dishwasher but he has never had one before so it probably does seem easier to him to just wash up. Doesn't excuse the leaving things in cold water or only selectively washing up though!

Just do a dishwasher load put it on every evening before bed whether he's washed up or not just shove it all in. I'd just do this and leave him out of it completely.

MrTrebus: so he gets out of doing a domestic task by repeatedly fucking it up so OP just does it herself? That's only a good solution if he then takes on a different domestic task and does that properly.

I have an opposite problem with my mother, she will use every cupshe has and instead of washing/reusing she will fill the dishwasher with them. Gets on my nerves no end . She never ever did wash and reuse a cup . At one point she had left so many outside (smoking) that my sister planted them in the border.

Bet he does the plates and the glasses, leaving the pans and burnt on crap ‘to soak’. If it’s just you and him then yes, probably a couple of plates takes about a minute to wash. But he’s leaving the annoying stuff to you to deal with.

My DH was like this. So was I tbh. So we got a dishwasher

This is for pps who cheerfully run the dishwasher whether it's full or not.

I bought a dishwasher but I live on my own and only use it when I'm entertaining. That's after looking at my electricity bill. It went down by a third when I reverted to washing up by hand. And it's so much quicker.

The numbers don't stack up like that for me thyme. Our dishwasher costs about 20 pence a cycle to run on a normal wash.

If it goes on every day, it costs £6 a month to run. In reality, it probably goes on 5 days a week, so dropping the number of washes to the bare minimum, it will cost probably a fiver a month worth every penny and more IMHO. Plus washing up by hand you would have to heat the water by other means.

Washing up by hand uses a lot more water as a dishwashers uses about half a sink full of water per cycle - you won't get very far with 12 place settings, cups, glasses, bowls, pans, cutlery etc with half a sink full of water.

You either use very very little electricity, or your dishwasher is extremely thirstly on the power consumption to save a third of your electricity bill by switching to hand washing.

@Thymeout nah I don't believe that, the water use of dishwashers is low and the electricity costs are only like 20-30p per wash.

I do use v little electricity. Gas CH and hot water. Gas for cooking. Electricity just for washing machine and dishwasher, plus usual TV, lights etc.

My supplier tells me how much electricity I use from year to year, and for me it was a third more with dishwasher, running it once a day on eco setting.

@cooldarkroom
Mine is the same! Drives me mad and I just put everything in the dishwasher afterwards! Such a waste of time but then he is a faffer!!

I agree with above, it is a lot more energy efficient and a lot cheaper to use a dishwasher than wash by hands - unless you are on your own and only used 1 mug and 1 spoon that day, obviously.

My DW runs every single evening (sometimes more), full or not. It's on economy, and if it's really not that full, on half load, or on a fast program. Because nothing has been left overnight or more, everything gets clean easily even on a fast wash.

OP, your Dh would drive me mad!

My father in law did this. Refused to use the dishwasher or let us use it. His reason was it was cheaper to wash by hand and we were being wasteful using it. He was actually quite wealthy.

So we’d all be visiting. Breakfast lunch and Dinner for eight people and we would have to hand wash piles and piles of dishes. The dishwasher was totally out of bounds. He was a cantankerous old bugger though.

Just thought this might be relevant...

DH comes from a family of committed hand washers. His dad will snatch your cup and wash it the moment you finish coffee etc.
After 20+ years of marriage we only got a dishwasher 4 years ago. He was very reluctant but managed to transfer his attachment from Proper Washing Up to Correctly Stacking The Dishwasher.

If you have a dishwasher you have to use for pretty much everything or it doesn't get filled enough to run every night. Is he afraid of it?

Tape the lid of the Fairy shut.

Don't you need a dish drainer for large saucepans and pots etc? We have both. Get one and then you and your dh can both do things your own way

He probably thinks it's more efficient and cheaper. He would be wrong.

(n.b. I have previously sent this link to my dishwasher avoiding OH)

www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/energy-bills/11250403/Dishwasher-vs-washing-up-which-is-cheaper.html

As long as things get washed up is it really a problem

Doesn't excuse the leaving things in cold water or only selectively washing up though!

Ah, the leaving things 'in soak' (i.e.in cold dirty water), that's a staple form of procrastination in non-dishwasher owning households in my experience.

re leaving to soak, I now leave these pans. f he doesn't do them in the morning (he gets up hours before me, he can't sleep) I leave them outside. Sod it. I'm not playing anymore