To discuss my period in front of my 13yo DS?

[Geillis]

Peri-menopausal. I feel like my periods are literally trying to kill me each month and I keep sanitary towels and tampons in both loos in a basket next to the sink as I need them regularly and usually urgently.

My sons are aware of my periods and how they affect me and I think nothing of asking them to nip upstairs to get me supplies or fill a hot water bottle. My friend was round this evening and was “horrified” at this being a topic of conversation especially in front my 13yo who “is probably secretly disgusted” by my periods. I am apparently “putting him off women” 🤣.

Should I be more discreet? It’s not like I go into gory detail...

No. You are a woman. Women have periods. He may go on to have girlfriends/female partner who will have periods. This is not a problem. Your friend is nuts.

@disneydatknee I’m laughing at these but should be crying!

offer to share his chocolate with me!

One day some girl is going to bless you for raising that boy!

A future girlfriend or wife may benefit from your having discussed periods with your son. Half the world have them for many years of their lives.

I used to work in an office with a guy who would completely freak out if one of the women said something along the lines of “oh, I have awful period pain” - nothing more graphic than that but it would send him into a flat spin. He was not only married but had two daughters, both of whom would now be teenagers. I genuinely can’t imagine not being able to ask my DP to pick up tampons or Feminax - although to be fair he generally does need either a photo or a web link to make sure he gets the correct product.

@Charolais wtaf???

Discussing your menses????

Are you Jane Austen???

@TheTroutofNoCraic I would have wanted to high five that lad, and his parents!

I've always been open and honest about my periods with my sons.

That must be why the oldest is gay, I've put him off women!

Cease and desist OP, lest your son catches the gay too!

TBH there is oversharing and TMI at times.

No one needs to know about the following habits of another person:
pissing
shitting
sex
wanking
periods

Yes they exist, no they don't need to be discussed in minute detail.

TheEmmaDilemma I hi-fived that lad and his parents on several occasions throughout the year, due to his, and their, absolutely dead on approach to everything. He was the kind of boy you want your daughter to end up with and your son to end up like.

I think you are fine.

Unless he plans on running off and living in a men only commune for the rest of his life he needs to be able to he a bit mature and considerate. Should any future sister in laws /girlfriends/female friends or housemates have a hard time with their periods the last thing they need is a baby getting precious about the sight of a tampon in the bathroom cupboard.

I had a boy friend once who got funn when I couldn't have sex as I was on my period. A man who fetches chocolate and runs a bath is preferable than one who thinks biology is gross and gets embarrassed.

Good for you OP and good for your DS. Why should there be any shame about a normal bodily function? Sounds like you’re raising a very considerate and thoughtful boy there. However - if you’re suffering that much with your periods OP I’d definitely recommend the Mirena coil, it’s changed my life!

Yes they exist, no they don't need to be discussed in minute detail

There's a middle ground between not saying anything and discussing in major detail at the dinner table.

Perfectly acceptable for teenage boys to not only know about the basic biology of periods but also about any effects they have on woman.

If someone suffers badly /extremely then the family need to be aware so they can help, or be prepared.

Don't get the problem. Shock horror if their wife is ill and can't go shopping they may have to buy tampons

As long as it's not graphic detail- totally normal and part of life, they need to know. I too have had - in happy, loud voice "mummy that's your nappy" -4yo DS spotting my pad while in a public loo

My 3 year old follows me into the loo sometimes and seems to be thrilled that I wear 'nappies like a baby' to catch the blood. Hopefully he will remain this nonchalant, nothing more pathetic than a man who can't cope with a period-where exactly does he think he came from?

@spliterz how is my period a habit?

ttbb don't you know, we women bleed on purpose, just to annoy people, we should stop this habit immediately! sarcasm

No YANBU, I had similar with teenage DS, he knows the score and that’s good IMO. It’s life.

How would that even work, the putting him off women bit? It's not like it could be kept secret from him in all future relationships! I'd say it's very healthy actually for them to know about the menstrual cycle of their primary female role model.

Your friend would be mortified that I once asked my 16 yo DB to go pick some pads/tampons for me as I was running out, not only did he do it, the poor lad had a party that same evening and ending up carrying all of it in his bag the entire night () . Some of his friends probably would have been mortified/grossed out had they found out but I was glad to see my brother acting like an adult and not freaking out at the thought of women having their period.

I also have a 10 yo DB and he knows all about periods. He is at the age where soon, girls his age will start having their first period. So it's only normal he learns about it so he doesn't freak out or act all grossed out if he happens to be around when that happens, and also because it's something that affect half of the population and is nothing to be ashamed of.

Your friend is being utterly ridiculous and I really hope her daughters won't grow up to be ashamed of having their period.

(still trying to put my DBs off of women by the way, just no luck as of yet! )

Your friend is a fool.

Presumably your friend is sleeping in the outhouse burning ritual cleansing herbs during That Time of Which We May Not Speak...

Presumably your friend is sleeping in the outhouse burning ritual cleansing herbs during That Time of Which We May Not Speak...

Mind you it's a good way of not cooking/being near milk or meat, in-case the meat turns rancid & the milk turns sour! Or it that thunder? I can never remember.

OP you are raising great men...carry on.

Yanbu if he has a girlfriend he's going to need to know about them, not discussing it because he's a boy is massively ignorant.

We've always been very open in our house and D's (nearly 16,) is not phased at all.
It used to make him leave the room so it was used to stop him being so nosey when I was gossiping with my friends but the other day I asked him to go buy me tampons (to Try and get him out of ear shot) thinking he'd go to his room but he was up for getting them and even knew which brand I didn't like.
I know if/when he has a girlfriend she won't need to be shy about her periods around him. He'll be understanding and probably buy her chocolate.