I don't have to actually say good morning- I'm not responsible for the way the world is now

[Ambonsai]

Old lady in the park this morning
She said good morning
I smiled at her, half got hello out, but got distracted because her dog was growling at my dog.
So she snapped at me "no response"
I said "oh sorry, hi"smiling
"No that's the way the world is now"
I said - sorry if I upset you by not saying good morning, I do try to smile at everyone in the park"

Turned away, Then I promptly burst into tears- emotional, hormonal right now.

I live in a very friendly area, most people say hello or smile especially if they have dogs. I chat most mornings to someone.
But cos I didn't actually say the words "good morning" I'm a symbol of what's wrong with the world.

Why did you say you always tried to smile at everyone in the park?! Apart from being a bit of a ridiculous comment, it sounded as if you were making an exception for her. Maybe that's what she was offended by?

Greyhound- she was offended long before I said that!
I said it to try and show her that I'm not the horrible non chatty person she thinks I am.

You don't walk around in a permanent state of readiness to speak, so I don't think you did anything wrong. I do say hello or good morning if people speak to me in the park, on a walk, but equally sometimes it takes you by surprise and they've moved on by the time you acknowledge it.

Very ungracious of her.

On a good day I would give her the benefit of doubt, she may be depressed or had bad news. Other days I'd put it down to being a rude git!

YANBU - it's a bit like when a stranger says "cheer up" - it might well be meant in a friendly way but it's inviting a conversation you didn't ask for and if you're preoccupied you might not deliver the response they are expecting. You didn't do anything wrong. Doing something wrong would have been telling her to fuck off!

After a few incidents like this, I started kindly pointing out to the "Your Generation" lot, that their beloved offspring are the ones that produced us, so if you always have to 'blame the parents', then where did our parents get their ideas from?

No wonder so many old people live lonely existences until they die. We are supposed to be social creatures.

Maybe it's just this miserable month of a not-so-great year-round climate.

If you've had a bad day you just put your head down don't you? No need to take it out on anyone else

I know what you mean Ambonsai but our mental health can suffer due to a variety of things. It can make people grumpy. I remember snapping at someone in the weeks after my mum died. Everything in the world felt cruel and pointless without her in it. I was cross with everyone.

Sorry but I think you were being rude.
If you hadn’t heard her then yes, fair enough but you did.
I’m only 40 and have always said hi or hello to people....and i still do unless they’ve got their head down.

What’s even worse is if the person knows you by sight and looks away.
How hard is it to say hello?

It’s not about the older generation and it’s not about having a lot on your mind to not reply to their hello.
Unless you have such severe anxiety that you are unable to say the word hi, then it’s rude.

In my mind, it’s no different to parents not writing thank you notes/thank you emails for presents, or not making their children write a thank you.....but that’s w hole other thread!

She basically snapped at me before I had the chance to say anything. I'd already smiled at her. I didn't have my phone out, I was smiling at the dogs. I wasn't rude.

Hmm. If I said hello, I’d think it rude for the person to only smile back.
Like why??
Bit different info she had wanted to stop and chat and you didn’t feel like it or you had to be somewhere but to not even be bothered to say hello is off.

So if someone didn't verbally reply you'd think it's rude? A nod or a smile is rude ?

Well that happens a hundred times on my walks.

I think a smile is fine OP.Sometimes people catch you off guard and it sounds like she jumped in before you had the chance to add more. Don't worry about it, just carry on being friendly and polite as you already are. There will be hundreds like you and a few who aren't for whatever reason but you can't control that.
"Be as you want to seem." Can't remember who said that!

Socrates!

"I always smile at everyone in the park" that made me laugh. That's the sort of thing I'd blurt out and then walk off thinking Why the heck did I say that?

I don't have a dog but walked a friend's dog once and noticed it was practically the law that you bellowed Morning! at every dog owner you passed swinging your little bag of poo. #dog walker etiquette.

I'd suggest hiding if you see the grumpy woman again though.

Are you usually very sensitive, OP? I know you said you were feeling emotional at the moment. Would you ordinarily cry at such a mild exchange?

I got told off the other day for feeding a baby seagull whilst waiting for a bus. My fault, of course, but the wifie waited until I’d finished feeding it before telling me off.

Rebuke was relatively mild, although apparently it’s all my fault there’s a gull infestation in Aberdeen. . But when I murmured something non commital and it was clear zero fucks were given, she stalked off in high dungeon to wait at the other end of the queue.

It was my bad, and she was right, but I really couldn’t care less. As a teenager, I’d have stewed over the incident for years.

Depending on whether I was pre or post tea she could have been dodging a few expletives if she’d said that to me. I’m not pleasant in the morning. I owe no-one a smile let alone thoughts and words. She’d be lucky I wasn’t growling, let alone the dog.

Butchy- seem to cry at the drop of a hat these days.
Hormonal, grieving, guilt, exhausted, finding it all a bit too much.

Well in that case, Amb give yourself a break, you didn't do anything wrong. You're going through a difficult time at the moment so it's understandable you cried.

Ambonsal don't waste another minute thinking about it. My mum died 2 years ago and I still find myself sat at the lights bawling for some random reason. You have permission to feel emotional, hormonal or whatever, It's ok.

Butchy I've seen the seagulls in Aberdeen, if they want my food they can bloody have it, not sure I could stop them if I wanted to!

OP, she was the one being rude. Yes it's polite to say good morning, but you don't expect a response - and a nod and smile is perfectly adequate anyway.

You didn't ignore her, she's the rude one here

Socrates didnt say that. Aristophanies did. It's socrates speaking in one of his plays. Frogs i think.

Oh right Minesril, t'internet's wrong then!